A new, life-saving informational pamphlet by the Reverend Professor J. Brewster

The Jaws of Life Cannot Save You from an Accident on the Information Superhighway!!!

Zoooooom! Yaaahhhhh!! Crash-Kaaa-BOOOOM!!!

What's that sound, dear reader? Why, it's the sound of yet another hapless soul careering out of control down the so-called Information Superhighway. Or should we be calling it The Information Stupor-Highway? Yes, it becomes clear to anyone with even the tiniest amount of grey matter concealed somewhere about their person that today's Modern World is not a Virtual Reality storefront locale, but a truly real, truly three-dimensional non-vacuum... a corporeal plane of very stolid solidity.

This is NOT a simulation!

Over the last few years the growth and popularity of the 'home computer' or 'electronic brain' market has been staggering. Statistically speaking, say those who should know, computing machines now outnumber dogs in many suburban homes. When computing machines outnumber human beings, will we then sit up and take notice? Or will it be 'too late'? Will we have become so reliant upon the speed and versatility of the Mighty Miniature Microchip that we will surrender the rest of our society to those demonic evil beings who inhabit Silicon Valley, just as today we have surrendered control over so many other aspects of our lives?

It's not the meek, it's the notion

Relaxing, carefree and enjoyable as it may be, you don't have to be a computer-controlled sheep. You can stand up on your hind legs and bleat as loudly as you are able: 'I am not a cog in the vast computerized machine! I am a human being! I deserve better than this, and I shall have it! Beep!' You have the right - nay, the responsibility - to take control of your own destiny. Human history consists of individuals fighting to run their own lives. (It also consists of individuals fighting to run other people's lives. For the moment we will ignore this inconvenient fact.) Be a part of history! Take back your own life! Don't let them run roughshod over you! And if they do run roughshod over you, demand an apology the next time you see them!

Don't be a disgusting worm!

Even if you actually believe yourself to be the lowest worm to wriggle in fear of The Powers That Be - and their infernal Electronic Brain Machines - you can still pretend you have a backbone. Don't just take the guff they hurl at you; stand up to them. They'll either recognize you as a strong and deserving human being, or they will crush you so completely, so utterly, that you will at least be out of your misery. Either way, ownership of your life will be returned to you. And isn't that what it's all about?

Reverend Professor J. Brewster has been called by some "the greatest single mind existing on this planet," while others have hailed him as "nothing less than the most intelligent spawn of the apes." Still others have said: "As a philosopher, metaphysician, psychic healer and mental gymnast, that [guy] is tops." Modestly preferring the company of angels, the Rev. Prof. shuns the Society of Man, spending his days in study and consultation with those who have Passed Over or who have (in the words of the Great Man himself) Died. In fact, much of the knowledge imparted by Rev. Prof. Brewster has been gleaned in conversation with the Honoured Dead. Communication is achieved through a combination of Tantrum Yoga, Preternatural Meditation and an advanced form of Ouija technology. The Reverend Professor believes his mission in today's troubled times is to help those less fortunate than himself. In thus desiring to help all the rest of the world, the Rev. Prof. Brewster knows he is truly engaged in God's Work, continuing what began so long ago with the building of the first Ziggurats in Sumer and continuing far into the next five years.

Here are several other information packed pamphlets which can be ordered by sending a money order for the full amount.