Touchy II

Author: PhileyX 
E-Mail: phileyxback@yahoo.com 
Web-site: https://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx
Rating: G
Category: UST
Prequels: Touchy from https://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Touchy.html
Disclaimer: Here I go again... Mulder and Scully belong to Fox.

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Touchy II 

"We're late." Scully sighed as they walked into the Skinner's outer office. Kim, the latter's secretary was nowhere in sight.

"No, we're not." Mulder refuted looking at his watch and then lifting it in front of his partner's face.

"We are late. Your watch is fifteen minutes slow. Didn't I tell you to get it fixed?"

He ignored her and proceeded to correct the time. "Should we knock or just wait?"

"Wait." She decided for him and sat down on the couch nearby.

Shaking his head at his ever-cautious partner, Mulder took a couple of steps towards his superior's door. He leaned his head against it for a moment and whispered. "Ooo... He's got company."

"Mulder, will you get the hell away from there? You're gonna get us both fired!" Scully hissed at him with a scorching glare.

Unperturbed, he began to casually glance over the files on Kim's desk. Then, he tried to get his partner's attention. "Psst Scully..." Unfortunately, she saw what he was up to and was determined not get involved. Instead, she looked fixedly out the door at nothing in particular. "Scully!" He growled this time.

The latter closed her eyes briefly and muttered a short prayer for patience before growling back. "Mulder, I am not interested in anything that you shouldn't be reading on that table so leave me alone."

"Not even your own psycho analysis that Dr. Lisa Matthews drew up?"

She refused to be baited yet again. "Sorry to disappoint you Mulder. Not even that."

Mulder watched his firm redheaded partner for a moment, a slow smile spreading across his face. "Are you sure? Because it's really interesting." Still no response. Instantly, the devil in him took complete control. "Hmmm... let's see here." He made a noisy production of the turning the page. "Mental status examination revealed an alert but perhaps slightly distracted individual. Eye contact was not completely appropriate, suggesting uneasiness of the session. Vocabulary and grammar skills suggested intellectual functioning beyond the average range..."

"Mulder, stop it. That's confidential!"

He ignored her. "You're right, too boring. Let's skip on to the good stuff, shall we?"

"Mulderrrr..."

"Results of psychological evaluation reveal an extended history of unresolved sexual tension with a long standing close friend or colleague, possibly her partner..."

"What?" Completely flabbergasted, Scully was immediately on her feet. "It doesn't say that!"

Her partner lifted the file slightly as if to counter her claim. Then he smugly went on. "The current clinical presentation was characterized primarily by disturbance of thought content, with repeated subject references towards her male counterpart. The patient appears to be attempting to cope with her obsessions and fantasies using extreme guardedness and withdrawal. Throughout recent years she has shown signs of physical intimacy..."

By that time, she had reached him. "Give me that!"

Unfortunately, he was too fast for her and lifted the file high above her head. "It is recommended that efforts to restrain the patient from jumping her partner should be implemented, preferably handcuffs or when all else fails, a straightjacket. Once her horniness has been..."

As the narration began to take on a more ridiculous nature, Scully began to realize that he was teasing her. Sure enough, the file hovering above her was entitled 'Claims And Expenditure Log'. Clenching one fist and grabbing his tie with the other, she growled fiercely. "You are so dead."

He laughed before warning her. "Tsk tsk tsk, there you go again Scully. Just can't get enough of me, can you?"

She instantly let go and gave him the mother of all glares. Before he could shrink away from the intensity of it, Skinner's door suddenly swung open, hiding both them behind it. Not wanting to be caught handling files that weren't their business, Scully temporarily put aside her thoughts of murder and joined her partner in silence, waiting for the door that shielded them to close again.

Meanwhile, Assistant Director Walter Skinner glanced at the waiting area of his outer office from his office doorway. 'They're late. Again.' He thought, rolling his eyes.

Dr. Lisa Matthew walked passed him. "I'm sorry, Walter. I'm sticking to my findings."

"And I'm sticking to mine." He told her. "They are not suitable for the job and I'm recommending just that."

"But I'm the psychologist. Who do you think Carter will listen to?"

"You spend fifteen minutes with them and you think you know them through and through?"

"What I think is that there is no real concern about their sexual attraction towards each other."

"No real concern? Have you seen them together?"

Slightly irritated, Lisa rolled her eyes and snapped back. "They're been partners for seven years. You would think if there's anything there, they would have done it already!"

"Yes well sometimes it's hard to understand what goes on in their paranoid little minds." He growled.

"Fine, do whatever you want Walter. But good luck with your recommendation because Carter's having a tough time finding a pair of agents for this lousy job. Agents Mulder and Scully were his only hope."

"He'll live."

Lisa shook her head and waved him goodbye as she strode out. When she was gone, Skinner muttered a curse under his breath and walked into his office, closing the door behind him.

Only after half a minute had passed did Mulder and Scully begin to react to the conversation that had just taken place between the Bureau psychologist and their superior. Mulder started first. "Son of a..."

"I thought he was on our side." His partner muttered in accordance.

"When will we ever learn? Trust no one." They looked at each other, both still somewhat dazed. But they weren't given any opportunity to talk about it further because SAC Mike Carter suddenly appeared at the door.

"Agent Mulder. Agent Scully. Good, you're already here." The FBI director sauntered confidently towards their direct superior's door. "Well let's get on with it, shall we?"

Before Mulder walked into Skinner's office, he shot Scully a look. One that she recognized well. He was going to put a stop to this. And for a moment, Scully felt a little apprehensive because usually that meant that things were bound to go wrong. She shook her head slightly to object but he gave her another intense glare and she sighed. He was determined and there was nothing she could gesture that would stop him.

While Carter made himself comfortable in his seat, Skinner walked passed his agents and softly rebuked them. "You're late. I wanted to speak to you before he came." The duo did not reply but each gave him a piercing look. Their superior frowned, unsure why they did.

Then Carter spoke, breaking the tense moment. "Agents, for the past seven years, you have been invaluable to this department. Although the nature of your inquiries are a little bizarre and perhaps most would write them off as a complete waste of the Bureau's resources, I find your success rate of these unsolved cases quite impressive. The both of you certainly show an aptitude for investigative work with good coordination of the minds and skills. I'm not sure if Walter has filled you in with the details but he did send me a distressing memo this morning, saying that he does not recommend you for this job. However, I thought I might still have a go and try to persuade him to change his mind. I was hoping I could count on the both of you to help me out here."

Mulder cleared his throat. "Oh we'll be more than happy to convince him, Sir."

"Agent Mulder..." Skinner began to interrupt.

"With all due respect Sir, would you mind if I said my piece before you begin your lame-ass excuses?"

Scully cringed. She was right, it was going to be all downhill from here. But not that she really cared. If Skinner was going to shut them down, they might as well go in glory.

Meanwhile Skinner's jaw tightened a notch. "Do you know why the both of you are here at all?"

In reply, Mulder's eyes flashed in anger. "We do, Sir. We're here to hear your wonderful work of fiction on why Scully and I aren't suitable for the job we've been working our butts off to keep."

"Well I certainly didn't know you and Agent Scully had this much passion for..." Carter began.

But Mulder turned and cut him off. "Sir, Agent Scully and I have worked for seven years on the X-files to get to where we are today. We are professionals and we are damned good at what we do. Despite what Assistant Director Skinner said in his memo, I assure you the only thing we're passionate about is our work."

Skinner initially looked furious then a moment later, the look morphed into defeat. Shaking his head, he stared a spot between his feet in silence. Carter glanced at the director and seeing his reflective state decided to get a second opinion. "And do you feel the same way as your partner, Agent Scully?"

Licking her lips, Scully lifted her head confidently. "Yes Sir. I do."

Suddenly smiling, Carter got up from his seat. "Good. I'm sorry Walter. If your agents want this job so much, I say give it to them. Not to mention, it'll save me a hell lot of trouble finding a new Mr. and Mrs. Bunsen. They are to report to the Miami Office on Friday morning, bright and early." He nodded at the two confused agents. "Good luck, agents. You'll need it." Then, he strode out of the office.

Mulder and Scully shared a dumbfounded look and together they glanced at their superior who was still studying the carpeted floor. Scully finally plucked up the courage to ask the question that was burning on both their minds. "Erm... sir? Who are Mr. and Mrs. Bunsen?"

Skinner looked up and gave them a sardonic smile. "You are."

"What?" They echoed collectively.

The former sighed and walked to his table, picked up two files and tossed one to each of them. "Recently, the Miami Bureau have come to a conclusion that the local lifeguard team has a part in the smuggling of drugs. Carter's agents decided it would be best if they sent in a pair of undercover agents as lifeguards to find the evidence. To prevent complicated external relationship issues, they decided that it would be best if they sent in a married couple. It will also be a perfect excuse for the couple of be constantly seen together or wanting to be left alone. And a few of minutes ago, you two graciously offered your services."

"For six months?" Scully eyes widen as she read the file in her hand.

"At least. You will have to stay as long as you have to until your find enough to shut the whole operation down."

"Wait a minute, we didn't volunteer for this. We thought..." Mulder began.

But Skinner gleefully cut him off. "You can expect to be trained in CPR and other life saving techniques when you reach the Miami office." His voice grew a little thick as he continued. "Oh and bring swimsuits, tank tops, shorts and various skimpy articles because Miami can be very... um... hot."

Mulder snapped his head up to look at him. The twinkle in his superior's eye said it all. The latter was fully aware that he was barely able to keep his hands to himself as it is and thus was trying to get them out of the assignment. Unfortunately, the conversation that they weren't supposed to hear caused them to completely misread everything and now they were heading for potential disaster. 'Scully in a swimsuit, tank tops, shorts and various skimpy articles? Oh shit!' Mulder thought.

"The reason why you had to see Lisa Matthews was because of the long term proximity in the lifeguard hostel. It's a tiny apartment with a tiny room and a tiny bed. We needed to make sure that you two were able to handle it professionally. Then of course it doesn't help with the both of you strutting around with one or two-piece bathing suits." He cleared his throat and drawled on further. "But since your psychological analysis read nothing and you were so eloquent about the total disregard of each other's sexuality, I guess I can rest easy knowing there is absolutely no danger of indiscreet behaviour. All I can say now is that I'm sorry I doubted you in the first place."

At that precise moment Scully was imagining Mulder in speedos. Hearing Skinner's apology, she guiltily shook the thought away. 'Six months with a nearly naked and probably well-tanned Mulder, lying next to her in a tiny bed? Oh shit!'

"Well, I'll leave you to read up your profiles. Kim should be back from lunch by now, I'll get her to make the travel arrangements." With that, Skinner strode out with a mischievous smile.

A full minute of silence remained in the room. Then Scully broke it, plucking an excuse from the thin air. "We can't do this Mulder. You don't even own a pair of trunks."

'I will not think of Scully in a bathing suit. I will not..' Mulder chanted repeatedly to himself but a couple of seconds later he asked anyway. "Do you?"

"Sure I do. But this is ridiculous! Six months and maybe more? What about the X-files?"

"A one piece or two piece?"

"Two." She muttered at first and then raised an eyebrow. "Mulder, what the hell has that got to do with anything?" Her preoccupied partner bit his inner lip for a moment. "Mulder?"

Suddenly, he stood up. "You're right. We can't do this." He rolled the file in his hand and tapped her shoulder gently. "Come on, you've got to talk to Skinner."

"Me? And tell him what?"

"That you're secretly in love with me. I'm pretty sure he'll take us off the case then."

She was absolutely incredulous and glared at him. "You know what? Why don't you go tell him that!"

He pretended to misunderstand. "Well okay. But don't you think it's a little egoistical for me to tell him that you're secretly in love with me?" The glare grew fiercer and he argued. "But you're the obvious one. He'll never believe I have designs on you. You're touchy, remember?"

"Jesus Christ, Mulder! I refuse to get into that stupid argument again." She groaned loudly.

"Fine. How about we go have another session with Lisa Matthews?"

"What?" She sputtered, totally dumbfounded. After all the trouble she went through in convincing the shrink that she was molested daily by her family, now he wanted her to convince her otherwise? "No."

"Then just what do you propose we do, Scully?"

She closed her eyes tightly in frustration. 'No matter what, I will not relent.' She told herself firmly. 'I will not succumb to Mulder's insane sense of logic. I will not go tell Skinner that I'm secretly in love with my partner. I'd rather spend six months with him on the beach, in the glorious sun and nearly nude, rub and massage lotion on his splendid body and maybe even allow him to the same for me... Good God! What am I thinking?'

Her eyes opened and Mulder was looked at her curiously. "Scully, you okay? You kinda zoned out there for a while."

She blinked twice and nodded. "I'm... fine."

"Thought of anything yet?"

Sighing, she shook her head at him but internally she strengthened her resolve, not to relent. Then her partner gave her a look and her confidence began to waver. 'Uh oh. Not that look again!' Suddenly, she had a bad feeling that Mulder will eventually get his way. Again.

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End of Touchy II 

Someone asked for a sequel and I live to please. Well at least, I try to.
E-Mail: phileyxback@yahoo.com