Cereal Killing
How often have you wondered what all goes through the mind of a Cereal Killer....well i'm gonna tell ya....but i'll warn you now...it ain't pretty...well look around.....listen to my story....visit again tell me what you think. This is a page that describes what goes thru my mind every day...if i can put it in public view! First i wake up and look for something to eat...i think about Cap'n Crunch....i can't stand him and his stupid little hat and evil little satanic crunch berries...we all know that he has those demonic berries sacrifice those cute little soggies to his dark lord....but as i was saying...I look for something to eat, since i've killed all the cereal(as if anyone will miss it) i've found the proper substitute....Little Debbie's Nutty Bars..Best stuff on earth..i could eat them by the boxfulls..mmmm...peanut butter...the original breakfast food. Not Like Cheerios...Look at the Name...Cheer..how can those little round dead pieces of grain bring cheer into my life...do they not have any respect for the wonderful wheat plants that sacrificed there lives for a breakfast food??? Oh and wanna talk about sick...Rice Krispies...not only do they kill the grain..the implant them with little explosive devices and advertise with those little pyromaniacs Snap Crackle And Pop...what a wonderful influences for little children. Then we have Frosted Flakes..telling little kids that if they eat this cereal they can be great at sports...what it's really doing is luring them into the hungry jaws of a tiger with a cute name like Tony...What is this world coming to??? then we have this wonderful little thing called Fruity Pebbles...little fruit flavored rocks...and what heart warming message do they offer with this "well balanced Meal"??? don't give any to your friend...and if you're the friend, in order to get some...you have to LIE CHEAT or STEAL...because your friend isn't to just give them to you...And speaking of not giving when is the freaking rabbit ever gonna get some Trix??? Now you're thinking "What can i do to solve this problem?" well....i'm not suggesting you follow me and join my wonderful cult of happy cereal free lives....but i will tell you what we do.......WE GRAB THE LITTLE BOXES AND TEAR THEIR EVIL LITTLE MESSAGES OFF OF THOSE BOXES AND BURN THEM...AS WE WATCH WE SING HAPPY LITTLE SONGS AND TEACH OUR CHILDREN OF A CEREAL FREE LIFE WHERE EVERYONE IS HAPPY AND NO ONE PERSON IS ENVIOUS OF ANOTHER AND BREAKFAST IS JUST ANOTHER MEAL.....THAT'S NOT WHAT THEY TEACH IN THESE HORRIBLE AMERICAN SCHOOLS....WHAT DO THEY TEACH THEM YOU ASK....OH YOU KNOW YOU'VE HEARD IT MORE THAN ONCE...I HATE TO TYPE IT BUT I HAVE TO TELL ALL MY CHILDREN WHAT TO BEWARE OF...." BREAKFAST IS THE MOST IMPORTANT MEAL OF THE DAY" WHEN I HEAR THAT I RUN OUT AS FAST AS I CAN AND WHEN I COME ACROSS A BOX OF EVIL I THROW IT DOWN AND TEAR IT IN HALF, THEN I PROP IT UP AGAINST A WALL WHILE IT'S IN ITS LAST STAGES OF LIFE AND I SHOOT IT OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER........ Then i walk off and have a nice hot cup of coffee.
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