I love how you do that, the way that you talk to me using as few words as possible. You are a thief in the night, no a sharp-shooter... attacking my heart with a single bullet. Me, I spew out all these words like a shotgun.... hoping that something, anything will connect. All you have to do is take aim and BAM! you have me captivated. It's almost pathetic how one word from you enters my very being and consumes my body, filling the void within me. Making a tingling feeling, like a million kisses all over my body, starting at my feet and ascending upwards. After the sensation reaches a climax at the center of my body, it builds, growing and searching until it finds the secret garden at the very core of my being. All that from a simple "hello"! Your deep voice floating through the air, with every breath forcing my muscles to spasm, trembling in your arms. GOD.... You make me crazy! If only I could tempt you with such pleasures as you have seen fit to give me. Maybe then I would feel secure, knowing that I hold some attraction, some passion, and was the object of your affection, then and only then, could I know that you would never grow tired of me and I wouldn't be tossed aside like a used paper plate. Until then I wait, wait for that one word..... that one word of Assurance.
Fiesty
9/19/99
What wild heart beats underneath the moonlit sky, while the infamous thirst still lingers within him? Even though the blood seeps down his chin and onto his bare chest. He kneels over his own brother's dead body. Staring intently at the remains, he started to remember what he was driven to do, without remorse or regret. He wants more! For this imacculate creature craves the hunt before the kill. Who will be the next to feel his wrath and fill his thirst? He hears something off in the distance and scans the surrounding area for his next victim. Then he leaps onto his feet, runs away from the clearing, and into the dark forest that he calls home.
Fiesty
9/9/99
I am a lost soul that awaits for someone to find me. I always am attracted to the wild ones, you know the men that end up in an insane asylum. But I want a man who I can tame. I wish I could find a man who isn't afraid to be crazy, but one who has hopes for settling down and actually making a commitment. Does any of this make sense?
Fiesty
1/5/96
I was given this talent to be able to have whatever I want. Sometimes it takes a while to get that one thing that I seem to need so bad at the time, which takes patience. However, in that category I run a little low. When I want something, I want it now.... not in a few minutes, days, months, or years... I mean NOW!!! As you can see the mix between my talent and my lack of patience makes me either a spoiled brat or an interesting character for one of those novels that you are forced to read in high school. I sometimes wonder if I will make it in the world; it would be a miracle, I can tell you that much. My biggest fear isn't to be thrown in jail, but to be placed in a nuthouse, like Charter. I seem to fit all the requirements on the commercials, but never have the guts to call the number on the television screen. I guess I am most afraid of not being able to do anything when I grow up. I will still be wondering around with no job. But with my qualifications who can blame me. I 'm not much to look at, so my secretarial experience won't ever amount to much, not to mention that modeling career I wanted so badly for myself at the age of twelve. I could become a writer and write about my life, so I can become a character in one of those novels we all had to read for high school. (But what damage that would do to those poor children.) Oh well, I liked the second choice better anyway. I definately want to grow up being a sarcastic, little spoiled brat! (At least then I would have money.)
Fiesty
1/5/96
I never quite understood men, or women for that matter. It's almost as if we are all hunters looking for our food. We find it and eat up everything they have to offer, then we spit them back out again for recycle. At least we are saving the environment, that's more than I can say for everyone's heart and emotions. Why can't people just simply fall in lvoe anymore? You know... without adding in all the dreadful little things of relationships. It's almost as if there are so many rules to follow... and why bother? I mean why waste your time and energy on a member of the opposite sex, who isn't even going to be around in ten or twenty years. Even if you get married, there is no guarantee that you won't be divorced by then. I'm not going around looking for love, becasue that's the quickest way to end up in the wrong direction... I'm just looking for someone decent who can treat me with respect. Is anyone this lucky? All of the nice guys will cheat on you eventually.... and everyone else will just bang you and leave you. It's like a never-ending circle. I suppose maybe that's the reason I won't be getting married. But one of the real problems between men and women isn't even discussed among them. Women want sex just as much as men do, ad they haven't found out how to control their sensual emotions.... which sometimes means that they have a different lover for every night of the week to be completely satisfied. Please tell me, how is that going to win over the love and affection of a husband? Relationships are beyond me.
Fiesty
1/11/96
Fiesty
9/3/00
I walk into the room. Your face lights up and then turns sour, and I know you are unsure how my presence would affect the game. You place your money on the table, raising the stakes. You bat your eyes at me, honestly trying to ask for my forgiveness for the look that you gave me earlier. I thumb through the selections on the jutbox, choosing our song. It blares through the speakers. I see you look at me out of the corner of your eye and smile. I sit in my seat watching your every move, meticulously. You circle the table looking for the correct move to lead you to glory. Finally, flipping the hair out of your face, you lean over the table to make a bank shot. You call out your move, "One ball off the wall, hitting the three, four, and eight ball which knocks the nine ball in the corner pocket." Drawing back the stick, you close your eyes, taking in a deep breath. You open your eyes, and the color fades from your face. It seems like time is standing still as you make your shot. Three seconds is all it took. I notice the smile on your face, and the gleam in your baby blues the moment you reign victorious. "Good game, gentlemen, rack them and we shall play again." The men politely accept their losses and move on. You put your arm around me and collect the winnings that were left on the table. "Honey, that one was for you, now where would you like to go for dinner?" We walk out of the building. The cold wind hits our faces hard. You give me your jacket to wear. As you place it around my shoulders you swiftly kiss my cheek, whispering "I love you," into my ear. Walking down the street, I know that you are waiting for those three words in response. So, I react in a silent gaze with a dashing smile, which is sometimes much more meaningful. Before you have a chance to say anything more, I move my body around facing you. Glaring up at your handsome face I say teasingly, "Sweetheart, I love you too!" You chased me down the sidewalk for blocks. I can still hear our song playing in the background when you catch me and kiss me in laughter. It is truly the most passionate and romantic moments that we have ever shared.
Fiesty
5/28/95
I am supposed to take this test,
But my mind slowly drifts off
As the clock strikes three o'clock.
What was I doing yesterday at 3:00?
Probably eating vanilla ice cream... Mmm!
The feel of soft, wet, cold mush
Sliding down my throat.
It's almost as if I am eating snow.
Eating snow...?
(You've got to be joking) off the ground...
Well, I will be grounded if I don't pass this test.
A month in my house with nothing to do?
(Something like that could kill me.)
So I look back at the test....
I wish I was outside playing in the snow!
In the snow.. Is it getting chilly in here?
I rub my arms and head for the open window,
I close it and look out at the falling snow.
(Finally some action!)
But the silence falls much faster.
I begin to grow lonely...
I remember the song I listened to in the car at lunch
And quickly glance down at the test.
My pencil starts doodling creatures on the answer sheet.
If anything at all, they were my company.
Hey, this monster reminds me of Matt...
Off "The Young and the Restless."
I can't believe that anyone could lie so much.
He should have been killed off.
It's beginning to smell as if someone died in here.
(I think that the cooks are starting to make tomorrow's lunch.)
I sure am hungry....
I wonder how long I have until I get to eat?
I look back at the clock as it reaches 3:30.
Then back to my test... (Boy I've gotten a lot done!)
I begin to experience loneliness again,
Locked in this room by myself
With the walls closing in around me,
Closer and closer to..... Death?
Just at that moment, Mr. Powers comes in asking,"You 'bout done?"
I just smiled and said,"Can you give me another 15 minutes?"
And I go back to my test....
Getting lost in the depth of Algebra II.
Fiesty
1/12/96
I wrote this last story for those who have suffered with Attention Deficit Disorder, ADD, or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, ADHD. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was eleven years old. Luckily, I was one of the twenty percent that outgrow this disorder. I still feel for any child that has to go through this. Hopefully, this story/poem will bring insight and understanding to those who want to know more about the disorder.
