CHAPTER FIVE
“What more do you want from me, Dad? How many more tests do I need to pass before I’m good enough to be your son?” He shouted.
Peter glared at him. “There aren’t enough tests in the world for that, you miserable little shit.”
Tom stared at his feet and said nothing. He knew better than to disagree with him. He knew what would happen if he did.
“Your dressed awful fancy there, boy,” said Peter, changing topics quickly. He sniffed the side of Tom’s face. “Well now. If I didn’t know better, I’d say that was a woman’s perfume I smell. What? Didja have a hot date?” He snickered unpleasantly. “That why your all dressed up? In your sissy clothes, with that sissy ponytail. If you ask me, you look like a fuckin’ faggot.”
Peter came up from behind him and whispered in his ear. “I bet the dumb bitch didn’t get lucky, did she Todd? ‘Cause I know what you’re problem is,” he purred. “You couldn’t get your tiny pecker up if your life depended on it.” He laughed darkly. “No son of mine would have that problem. Your not a man, Todd, and you never will be. You sure as shit could never be like me. Not in a million years. Women were always beggin’ me for it. And I was more than willing to give it to them.”
Tom closed his eyes against the memory of his father sodomizing his mother. He walked into their bedroom late one night. He’d had a nightmare and was scared. He heard muffled cries coming from his parent’s room. He opened he door and stood transfixed with horror.
His father was behind his mom, hurting her. His face was dark and vicious, and he was calling her filthy names. His mother had her hand clamped over her mouth, trying to muffle her cries so her son wouldn’t hear. She had a black eye, and blood was running down her legs. His father turned around and stared straight at him. Then he laughed. He was eight years old at the time.
“Get it over with,” Tom begged through clenched teeth. “Just do it… and then please… just go, and leave me alone.” His shoulders were shaking with angry sobs.
Peter faced him. “All in good time, Todd. All in good time. Our little fun and games are just beginning. We can’t hurry things along, can we?” Peter leaned his face so close to Tom’s that their lips almost touched. “I want to drag this out for a long, long time,” he said venomously. His voice was ominous and sinister.
He lightly kissed Tom’s lips, biting the lower one sharply as he drew away. “Test number two is finished,” he said abruptly. He took a last drag on his cigar, blowing the smoke in Tom’s face. He walked over and dropped it into the snifter of brandy. “You really should get yourself an ashtray,” he quipped. He walked out the front door leaving it wide open.
Tom raced to the door and bolted it. He slid down to his knees holding his head in his hands. “It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay,” he whispered. But deep down he knew that was the biggest lie of all.
The next day Todd combed through every hotel, inn, and motel. There was no sign of his miserable father anywhere. It was like he fell of the face of the planet. “Goddammit!” He shouted in frustration. He was holed up somewhere. Close by. He knew it, he could feel it.
Waiting and watching.
He was shaking with fury. That bastard came into his house. Drank his liquor, and proceeded to shit on him, just like he always did. He hated him with a blinding passion. Oh yeah? Then why the hell didn’t you do something about it Todd? Why are you such a useless, pathetic coward? Let me out and I’ll kill him. I’ll fix it so you’ll never have to see him again.
“Shut-up!” I’m gonna handle it, not you!” He shouted. He pulled his black Ferrarri alongside the curb and laid his head on the steering wheel, breathing harshly. He knew now, what everybody else, had guessed. He was fucked up, completely. Last night when his old man was there, it was as if he were deep inside himself. He knew what was happening to him, but he couldn’t get out, no matter how hard he tried. It was like being in a lake, then someone came and put a sheet of glass over it. You banged your fists against it, but you were trapped. You couldn’t speak, you couldn’t breath. He was at the very bottom of that lake.
He had to stay in control. His life depended on it.
When are you going to get it, Todd? I am you and you are me. Forget about the other’s, their just by-products. Once you accept that, you’ll defeat him. Until then… YOUR SCREWED.
“Who are you?” He whispered harshly.
Nothing. Silence.
He rubbed his hand over his goatee. He sighed tiredly pulled away from the curb smoothly. He headed in the direction of the diner. The Sausalito streets were busy with tourists walking from shop to shop, happy and carefree. Todd shook his head. He wondered what that felt like.
“What the…?” Todd narrowed his eyes. There was Manning. He was seated outside a café drinking expresso without a care in the world. Pete pulled sharply over and jumped out of the car. He crossed the street in a flash, with his teeth bared. His long legs ate the space between them in a heartbeat.
He took advantage of Mannings surprise and knocked the small table over. He grabbed Peter by his collar and yanked him roughly to his feet. “Hey asshole,” he snarled. “I just thought I’d come on over and deliver a little message. If you EVER come in his house again, I will fuckin’ kill you. You got that!”
Peter threw Pete’s arms off of him. “You?” He laughed incredulously. “You haven’t got the stones, sonny. And you’re not the one who’s in control. You don’t think I know who you are?” He leaned forward and whispered. “I created you, and I can destroy you in a heartbeat.”
Pete jerked his head back. “What the hell are you talkin’ about?” He whispered. “Hey! Excuse me? Would somebody please tell me just what the hell’s going on?” Todd spun around. The owner of the café, was in his face and understandably furious. “Who’s gonna pay for this? Huh? Give me a reason why I shouldn’t call the cops?” Todd reached into his coat and pulled his wallet out. “I’ll give you five,” he snapped. He shoved five hundred dollars into the guys hand. “Sorry for the trouble,” Todd said, not really sounding sorry at all. “Will this cover it?”
The owner, slightly mollified, nodded his head. “Yeah,” he said sourly. “Do me a favor, huh? Next time, take it somewhere else!” He stalked into the restaurant. “Gladly,” Todd muttered. He turned around and naturally, Manning was no where in sight. “Shit!” He yelled in frustration. If he didn’t have bad luck, he’d have no luck at all.
He stalked back to his car, ignoring the shocked looks from the patrons of the café. He gunned the powerful engine and took off, burning the tires and laying twenty feet of rubber on the street.
He needed to go home and regroup. He also had another person to deal with, and just the thought of it, made him sick to his stomach.
CHAPTER SIX
Clarice had just stepped out of the shower when she heard a sharp knock. Throwing a soft cotton robe on, she quickly walked to her front door. “Who is it?” She called.
“Thomas,” said Pete.
Smiling in surprise she opened her door. “Hi!” She looked down at herself, laughing softly. “As you can see, I just got out of the shower. Please come in.”
Pete walked in her apartment and tried to get his mind off the fact that Clarice was naked underneath her robe. She smelled incredible and the thin cotton molded itself sinfully over her body. He took a deep breath. This was going to be one of the hardest things he’d ever have to do.
“Can you wait a couple of minutes, while I change into some clothes?” Clarice said sweetly.
“No. Don’t bother, I won’t be here that long,” he said coldly.
Clarice stood still. “What’s wrong?” She asked faintly. Her heart began banging against her ribs. Thomas was dressed, well… differently. He looked tough and remote. A black leather jacket was worn over a tight black T-shirt. He had on black jeans with heavy boots. A thick silver chain was hooked on his belt loop, holding his keys. His hair was long and wild looking, like he’d run his fingers through it repeatedly. The scar, which added character to his face, stood out. Tonight, it made him look… sinister.
Pete bunched his jaw. “I can’t see you anymore,” he said abruptly.
Clarice took a step back. “Why?” She blinked several times. She could feel the tears coming. Her chest rose and fell rapidly.
He lifted one eyebrow. “Why? Because I don’t want to, that’s why.” He laughed slightly. His smile was white and cruel. Inside, he was breaking apart. “I don’t owe you any more of an explanation than that, Clarice.” His gaze was steady and cool. She put her hand to her throat. “I know you don’t mean that Thomas,” her voice was trembling uncontrollably.
Pete shook his head in amazement. “You don’t know me at all,” he said indifferently. Clarice shook her head. “You could not have kissed me the way you did, if I didn’t mean anything to you.”
In two quick strides he was in her face. He yanked her to him. He laced his fingers through her hair and held her head steady. He brought his mouth on hers, kissing her hard. He slanted his open mouth across hers and thrust his velvety tongue in her mouth. He pushed her against the wall and ground his hips into hers. He was rock hard. Clarice moaned and wrapped her arms around him. He pulled her arms from around his neck and stepped away from her. He casually ran his tongue over his lips and shrugged. “I kiss a lot of women. It doesn’t mean a thing. You don’t mean anything to me, Clarice. It was just a kiss. If you wanna have sex, hey, you’ll get no objections from me. But, it’ll only be a physical release,” he said matter-of-factly. His face was closed and shuttered.
Clarice’s face was leeched of all color. She was unaware of the tears running down her face. “Please… just go,” she whispered.
Todd turned around and squeezed his eyes shut. He walked out the door slamming it behind him. He was shaking so badly he could barley walk. He jumped on his black and sliver Kowasaki 1100. He revved the motor quickly and took off.
Peter Manning stepped out from behind a tall redwood. He looked up at Clarice Anderson’s apartment and smiled. “Gotcha!” He whispered.
Todd flew down the dark streets as fast as the powerful bike would take him. Once he got on Interstate 101, he jumped on it, reaching 110 mph in about ten seconds flat.
He wore no helmet and the wind cut through him like a blade. He didn’t care if he died. He hurt the one person in the world that cared about him.
We did what we had to do Todd. You know that. She wasn’t safe. Not with Manning out there.
God, the devastation on her face would haunt him for the rest of his life. He didn’t think it was possible to fall in love with someone so utterly and completely. What he felt for Tea and even Blair paled in comparison to what he felt for Clarice. It wasn’t based on money, or trickery, or lies. He loved her for the good and decent person that she was. The engine’s throbbing whine was the only thing he could hear. The scenery passed by in a blur. He oughta just end it right now. He cranked the throttle, and the bullet bike was up to 120 mph in an instant. He was no good to anyone.
There was a hairpin turn up about ten miles ahead. He’d be reaching at any time. Don’t Todd. I am you and you are me. Don’t give that motherfucker the satisfaction. For once in your miserable life, BE A MAN.
“Fuck you!” He screamed. He was sick of everything. People accused him of having no feelings. He felt EVERYTHING. He didn’t want to feel anymore. He wanted oblivion, he wanted death.
What about Starr Todd? You gonna leave her too? With no one to protect her? Bullshit. BE A MAN.
Todd slowed the bike down. 100, 85, 60, the speed dropped off until he was at a reasonable 45mph. He navigated the turn expertly and rolled off the freeway into the shoulder and let it idle. He was out of breath and trembling. It was the second time in his life that he came close to ending it.
I am you and you are me.
“What does that mean!” he shouted. His voice echoed throughout the mountains eerily. There was nothing but silence and the pounding of his heart. He sat there and slowly came to a decision. He was not a coward, he was not a quitter, he was who he was.
“Did you hear that Dad?” He shouted. “I will not let you destroy me!”
He revved the engine and pulled off the shoulder. He needed to think. He was gonna destroy that bastard before he destroyed him.
Todd Manning had no idea how bad things were going to get.
