Setting: Exam room 4.
Duo is entering with a pair of tweezers.
Duo: Hello Mrs. Septum, I’m Duo, your nurse.
Mrs. Septum: I…uh (hic) got a sliver (hic) in my tooshie.
Duo: Might I ask how you got a sliver in your tooshie?
<Puts on gloves>
Mrs. Septum: I…um. Well
(hic) the pool boy and I (hic) and we have (hic) wood floors.
Duo: I really don’t need to know anymore.
<Starts process of removing aforementioned sliver>
So do you have any kids?
Mrs. Septum: Yeah, I (hic) got three kids and (hic) ten
grandkids.
Duo: And yet you’re doing the pool boy? <Realizes what
he just said>
Mrs. Septum: My husband (hic) can’t get it up.
Duo: Uh..yeah. Do
you hiccup often?
Mrs. Septum: Only when I drink (hic).
Duo: Mind if I ask you how much you drink then?
Mrs. Septum: I’m not (hic) sure.
Duo: Let me rephrase that…when was the last time you were
sober?
Mrs. Septum: <looking proud> 1984!!