MWHB Presents: Millenium Wednesday
At the snow filled Pit, The MWHBers met for their final card of the millenium. Entitled Millenium Wednesday, It would prove to be a very fine event.
Professor Palpitator came out and was challenged by Fiend to a tag match between the IOV and Prof. Palp and partner of his choice. The commish, not wanting to be outdone, booked a match between himself and the Heavyweight Champion, Dusty Boy.
Match 1:
For the Pussyweight Title:
Sonny Ono vs. Big Gotlibowski vs. The Giant Killer Pratt
It was announced the Butane was stripped from his title, because he was no longer within required weight to participate in Pussyweight Matches.
Big Gotlibowski was hit hard early in the match by the Tag Partners Pratt and Ono. He was eliminated after he took a moonsault from the Great American Pratt.
Eliminated First: Big Got via Prattsault
The Tag partners than began to work on each other, and it looked like Sonny was going to be the new champ, until Pratt pulled off a TKO.
Eliminated Second: Sonny Ono via TKO.
New Pussyweight Champion: The Giant Killer Pratt
Match 2:
Hardass Lobb vs. 1/2 of Team Security (Now known as the Duke)
Duke came out and asked who is his opponent was for this card. All of a sudden Hardass Lobb answered the call and came roaring out on a sled. He was dressed in baseball and hockey fatigues, covered in padding. The equipment would do him no good however, as Duke delivered a Spyder DDT and pulled off some nice suplexes. Hardass appeared to be finished after a devastating DVD, but, he was able to attempt a Hardass Headlock. It back fired on him, when Duke gave him a mule kick to the good ol family jewels. Hardass was unable to escape the wrath of the camel clutch and soon tapped out, giving Duke the win.
Winner: Duke via Camel Clutch
Match 3:
For TV Title
Fiend vs. TV Title Champ LSD
LSD is forced to defend his title against Fiend. The entire match was back and forth momentum, with niether wrestler really gaining any ground. That was until Professor Palpitator interfered, allowing LSD to nail Fiend with a Super Kick, then amazingly Scoop Slamed Fiend, setting him up for the Thug Splash off the fourth rung of the ladder. 1-2-3, LSD retains the title.
Winner: LSD via Thug Splash
Match 4:
High Performance Null vs Big Gotlibowski
HPN, as of yet undefeated, began this match-up with a variation of a Double Armed DDT. The momentum soon changed with Big Got performing a variety of standard moves, including a DDT, a leg drop, and other quick moves. HPN, not to be outdone, hit Got with a Cobra Clutch Slam, and a reverse Flatliner (Downward Spiral). Big Got is able to hit HPN with his finisher, the Got Drop (Spinning Splash), but doesn't go for the pin, and chooses to encite the crowd. This give HPN the oppurtunity to give Got the Nullifier, improving his record to 4-0.
Winner: High Performance Null via Nullifier
Match 5:
For Tag-Team Titles
The Duke vs. The Allied Powers
The Duke came out and seemed very confident that he could beat the tag champs with out his partner. Unfortunatley, he was wrong, Pratt and Ono quickly pulled off many double-team maneuvers. Those maneuvers consisted of Double Rocker Droppers, Double DDT, and the Double Suplex. It looked like thre was no chance for The Duke to win the match until, that back-stabbing american turned on his one time partner, Ono. Rolling up Ono in a school boy and getting the three count, to make Pratt and The Duke new Tag-Team champions and leaving Sonny Ono to wonder why his partner Pratt would turn on him.
Winner: The Duke and (PRATT?) via school boy
The camera is zoomed in on Professor Palpitator face. He is talking to someone off camera, and asks him if he is ready for thier match against the Innovators of Violence. The mysterious partner grunts an affirmation.
We now see LSD, and he gets the camera's attention. He says he is happy he won against Fiend, but even happier that he didn't have to face the Elephant Man. He says that the Elephant Man is a no-talent loser that can only hit people with light bulbs when they aren't looking. During this interview, we can see the Elephant Man sneak up behind LSD, and smack him over the head with a large flouresent light bulb.
LSD is now in the ring, and he callenges the Elephant Man to a match, and says he will put the TV Title on the line.
Match 6:
For the TV Title:
Elephant Man vs. TV Title Champion LSD
One of the finest matches of the card, LSD and the Elephant Man held nothing back. The Elephant Man clearly had the advantage early in the match, hitting LSD with a pull down piledriver, and a double underhook suplex. LSD, however, came back with a double armed DDT and a piledriver of his own. As he went to the top for an elbow drop, the Elephant Man rolled out of the way. Elephant then gave him a swinging bulldog that led to series of pin reversals. Then, in an act of pure queerness, Fiend decides he can interfere in the match. He is quickly by team security. Elephant Man stands up and delivers a viscious spear, and picks up LSD for the Pachyderm Pump. After a Big Leg Drop off the ladder, we have a new TV Title Champ.
Winner and New TV Title Champion: The Elephant Man
Match 7:
Jobber Battle Royale
Duke vs. Hardass Lobb vs. Big Got vs. Pratt vs. Sonny Ono vs. LSD
Elephant Man come out and says that he is using his power as the president of the MWHB to book a Jobber Battle Royale. He says he knows the LSD will lose, because he sucks. The rest of this match is so terrible, because of all the wrestlers were scrubs and jobbers, that I will not make you suffer by describing it in detail. In fact, the match was thrown out by the ref, the Elephant Man, after LSD assaulted him.
Match 8:
For The Heavyweight Title:
Professor Palpitator vs. Heavyweight Champion Dusty Boy
The match started off a normal Dusty Boy type match. He came out and did his usual gay routine, which put the crowd into an uproar. Professor Palpitator quickly grabbed the upper hand in the match operating on all cylinders he crushed Dusty Boy. Until Dusty Boy lead him to the wooded area where he executed a double ax handle from the tree. Then just as soon as Dusty Boy gained the momenteum he lost it when Professor Palpitator caught him off the tree and gave him three atomic drops. He then procedeed to bring Dusty Boy to the ring area and gave Dusty Boy a huge back body drop. But later in the match out of nowhere Dusty Boy got a run started by executing such moves as the shoe bite, knee drop, and a kamakazi headbutt. Late in the match Professor pulled off the Greetings to come within reach of the Heavyweight Title Fiend came out and ruined it for him. Allowing Dusty Boy to hit the Star of David and retain the Heavyweight Title.
Winner: Dusty Boy via Star of David
Match 9:
Innovators of Violence vs. Professor Palpitator/Mystery Partner.
It looked like at the beginning of the match that Professor Palpitator was not going to have a partner. So he wrestled alone and got stomped by Fiend and Dusty Boy. At one time in the match Fiend picked up his own partner Dusty Boy and Gorilla Pressed him on to Professor Palpitator, leaving him knocked sensless. It seemed that the IOV where to much for Professor Palpitator as they set him up for the Innovation. Until of god knows where, Elephant Man ran on to the seen to become Professor Palpitator's mystery partner. He stopped the Innovation from happenning and helped Palpitator gain control. All seemed well for Elephant Man and Professor Palpitator until the show ran out of time and a winner was I guess not decided. One thing that was made out was that Elephant Man had a shirt on that said something in the terms of a Dark Carnival.
Winner: (?) Draw
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