you're so stupid.
19 march 1999.
you're so Plain.

AUGH.

yeah, it's not the next day, but whatever. screw you, i'm pissed.

all right, i went to dinner. & afterwards, i walk into our little convienence store thing or whatever to get some kix. you know. maybe a two-liter bottle of soda or something. whatever. no big deal. five minutes, i'll be in & out. just let me stare at whomever is on the cover of newsweek or who is offering sin-sual sex tips on glamour & i'll be out in a minute.

i'm inside the store. & i guess i'm feeling kind of not so good about humanity because of two somethings i had seen earlier in the evening. at any rate, i just happen to be barefooted because it's hot outside & when there's no reason to wear shoes, i don't wear them. just because it makes me feel more bohemian. no, that's not it. just because i don't really like shoes. so i walk down the aisle to get my kix & the chick at the counter, who is talking to her friend on the phone about something absolutely inane & is twirling her hair around her finger to keep herself entertained until her next cigarette break, says, "you need shoes to be in here." uhh. let me explain that she, an employee of this fine, overpriced, money-sucking establishment, is in a crop top & high waters. if i'm not in proper dress, what is She wearing? uh huh. so i just pretended i didn't hear her & got my kix & went around to find some diet soda refreshment. jess comes over to me, & kind of nudges me: "shan, i think that chick's serious." so i look over & she's motioning to jess & me. bullshit. i think i'll take my time picking out my two-litered beverage, thank you.

so armed with my kix & my diet coke bottle & a hesitant, nonconfrontational sidekick, i go over to the register place, avoiding the skimp chick. but skanker says to the guy, "don't let her buy anything. she's not wearing shoes." uh WHAT?! what the FUCK?!
me: excuse me?
skankho: you're not wearing shoes.
me: i know. hence the reason i just want to patronize your store & leave.
skankhobitch: you are in violation of the rules. i'm sorry, but you're going to have to leave without your purchases.
me: what are you talking about? are you saying that you're not going to let me feed your salary by buying a four dollar box of cereal & some coke because i'm not wearing shoes? what sense does that make? (aside to guy) please just do it really quick. i don't want to bother with this.
skankhoslut: (aside to guy) jeff, don't ring her up, i said! (to me) can't you Read? the sign says "no shoes, no service."
me: okay, so say i'm working here. which is worse, me being barefoot or you wearing next to nothing & not doing crap?
skankhoevil: it doesn't say there's anything wrong with my clothing.
me: they probably couldn't fit it on the fucking si-- forget it. just let me buy my shit & leave.
skankhomraaah!: NO. you're holding up the line.
me: okay, i see. the standard is that i can't walk around without shoes. but you can parade back there in next to nothing & get paid for it. I SEE.
at this point, boywondersidekick is pulling on my shirt like a mama's boy, begging to just leave. hell no. i'm going to make my point.
you might not want to read this part. prepare for some gross images.


-- spoilahhhhh --


okay, you asked. i am totally pissed off here. "okay, i GET it now. so i'll do this." at this point, i take off my shirts (sweater & white t-shirt), wrap them around my feet & ask the guy again, "hi. now that i'm following protocol, could you Please put this on my flex account? thanks."
so miss snotface just kind of stands there, staring & jeff laughs while jesse pouts in the corner. he sticks the stuff in the bag & i sauntered out of the store followed by approving applause from the other customers.

ARGH. JESUS. don't fuck with me & my COKE, people!!!!! you WILL get something you Don't want to see.

oh, i wrote something. but i'll read it to you later.

fuck you.

i won't do what you tell me.