[8 december 1998.]

sing the fuck out of it, man.

i'm starting to look like the real thing.

i got justin's tape today. it shocks me that he put electrolite on here. everyone i talked to who went to tfc hated it. i screamed my lungs out afterwards. you've got to take the elevator the mezzanine.

harmonies. harmonies. yeah, i hear you. i hear you. hiding. i know you are. i need to take the trash out. my keyboard is sticky. so are my fingers. which came first?

there's a name i'd like to speak but it would come out wrong. so i'm keeping it on my tongue. i say it to myself before i go to sleep. there's a certain rise out of that. it makes me snicker under my breath. i wonder if erin hears me. i don't think i've ever said this word with any assurance before. there's pause.. because it's like i'm talking about living in south africa during a war. i have no idea what that's like. i dreamed of ringing voices, the sky opening up & exhaulting the word. your promises are as stable as my mental capacities, my dear. i wish i had my guitar with me. i would write some thing down. twiddle twiddle. twink. twink. space to breathe, space to move.

i shall become intangible.

with all my soul.

whispering i hear you whispering.

plunk, plink think drink sink.

hand me a __ & a kick.

dream small?

Never.