Chapter Thirteen

"Lance! You have mail!" Mrs. Bass called as Lance rushed into the house. He stopped immediately to give his Mom a kiss on the cheek.

Lance had just gotten back from florist shop. He had purchased a bouquet of bright sunflowers for Michelle, just for no particular reason at all. He and Michelle were going to take a romantic walk on the beach that evening, and talk about their prom plans. Lance knew how much Michelle loved sunflowers-more than roses anyway.

"Well now," Mrs. Bass said in an amused tone, "I am guessing that those flowers are for your object of your affection?"

Lance grinned, slightly embarrassed. "Yes, they're for Michelle. Guess what? I'm taking her to the prom!"

Mrs. Bass sensed the happiness in her son's voice. His eyes twinkled whenever he spoke of Michelle. Michelle had been over a few times, and Mrs. Bass found her to be a delightful, civil girl. She was intelligent and had good manners. Mr. and Mrs. Bass approved of their son's girlfriend.

"Well, here is your mail." Mrs. Bass held out a large envelope, which was slightly heavy. "It's from Michelle, I wonder what she sent you."

"I know. They're probably pictures from our four month anniversary," Lance said, examining her address on the envelope. "Someone took them for us when we went paint-balling and stuff." He ripped the envelope open excitedly. He peeked inside and pulled out several photos. He was right. They were photos of them when they went paint-balling. Michelle and him were smiling brightly into the camera, paint smeared on both of their faces and outfits. It had been a great day. Lance beamed as he took out the next picture.

The next one was one he took of Michelle when she was making a silly face. He laughed. She looked so funny but cute in the picture. He reached into the envelope and pulled out a thick bunch of papers. He was confused. It was his History project with Michelle, and it was finished.

"What is this doing here?" he asked aloud. Suddenly, a piece of paper flew out and Lance picked it up from the floor. He unfolded it and read Michelle's writing:

Dear Lance,

By the time you get this, I will have been gone. It was too hard for me to tell you myself. Knowing me, I have a weak character. I just want you to know that I love you sooo much, more than anyone else in the entire world.. I wanted to let you know that I am pregnant. I just wanted to let you know that it wasn't your fault that this happened, so please don't blame yourself for any of this. Here is our History project-the final draft and the timeline, everything. I finished it for us, Lance. Even though we'll never see each other again, I will always remember you. I didn't want to take my own life, I just felt that there was no other way out. My parents kicked me out of the house, and I didn't have anywhere else to go. My future was ruined because of my pregnancy. I just felt that there was no reason to go on. My own parents didn't even love me! Please don't forget me. I love you very much.

Yours always,

Michelle

P.S.- I hope we get that A!

Lance dropped the letter, hyperventilating. It was too hard to breathe. He felt suffocated. "Oh my God…" he whispered, vomit rising into his throat. Michelle was dead. She had committed suicide. "Oh my God!" he screamed, tears forming in his green eyes.

His Mom looked at him, fearful and worried. "Lance? Lance, what's wrong?" she asked with concern in her voice. She saw the pale look on Lance's face and knew something was definitely wrong.

Lance looked at his Mom with grief. "Mom…she's dead," he said in a low whisper. His eyes were full of tears, and he let them fall down his cheeks. "Michelle is dead! She killed herself! Mom, she committed suicide! She's really dead!" He broke down hysterically, sobbing uncontrollably.

Mrs. Bass rushed to his side and Lance embraced her tightly. He wept and wept, his body shaking. "No! No, she can't be dead!" he cried, sobbing into his mother's shoulder. "It can't be true, she really can't be gone. I love her. Please, no! She can't be gone!"

"I'm so sorry, dear," Mrs. Bass comforted, tears falling down her own cheeks. The girl Lance loved and adored took her own life. Mrs. Bass felt shock all over her body. Lance had never cried in a very long time. Right now he couldn't stop crying. He was in shock too, and he couldn't handle the fact that he would never see Michelle again.

"I love her! No!" Lance sobbed. "She's gone." His blurry vision saw the bouquet of sunflowers on the chair. They were no use to him anymore..

"Oh my God!" Jana exploded. JC had given her a ride home back to her house from bowling. As soon as she had walked inside the door, Mr. and Mrs. Chong had sadly given her the news. She had then found out the news about Michelle's death. Her hand flew over her mouth as her parents told her of Michelle's suicide. JC was pale in the face too. They had both lost a good friend of theirs.

"Mom! It can't be true!" Jana's face and hands were going white. "I won't accept that! Michelle wouldn't do that."

Even JC was sick with anguish. "Does Lance know about this?" he asked softly, looking down. He couldn't believe his own friend had taken her life. It was unbelievable for everyone. No one suspected of Michelle doing it. Poor Lance, he mourned.

"It is true," Mrs. Chong replied, dabbing a tissue over her eyes. "Mrs. Clarke called me and told me that Michelle hung herself in her room. According to Lance, she had mailed him a package the day before. She was sure of her pregnancy-"

"Pregnancy?" JC interrupted, overwhelmed. Dammit, Lance! he thought disapprovingly. "She was pregnant?"

"She was positive?" Jana also said at the same time. She buried her face in her hands. "Oh my God, no," she said, starting compulsively shaking.. She felt her hot tears over hands. JC quickly rushed to her side and hugged her.

"Yes, she was pregnant," Mr. Chong interrupted. "She didn't want to tell anyone. She was too miserable. Her parents disowned her."

"Disowned her!" Jana cried, looking up wiping away her tears. "Her own parents did that? Why? Why didn't they support her? She needed them!"

"We're all very shocked and sad," Mrs. Chong replied. "We don't know everything that happened." She walked away with Mr. Chong following her.

JC had his own grief to wallow in. This was so unexpected. Michelle just couldn't be dead. "JC," Jana lamented through tears, "we need each other right now."

JC nodded. "Yes," he answered, hugging her close to him. She was breaking down in front of him, crying mournfully over her friend. "I'm there for you."

"We…we just lost a good friend of ours," Jana said. "And I can't imagine what Lance is going through right now! Oh, he must be so much more upset than we both are!"

JC nodded. "I don't believe this all happened," he said, trying to keep his own tears from filling his blue eyes. He had cried too much recently. He would mourn Michelle at her funeral.

Lance kept himself locked in his room. It was the fourth night he had done this. He didn't want to talk to anyone. He didn't want to sleep, eat, or just plain get out of his room. I'm staying in here forever, he promised himself. He was still trying to get over the miserable fact that his own girlfriend-and best friend had died.

His parents had tried numerous of times to get him out of his room. They didn't want him penned up in his room anymore. Lance didn't feel the need to eat. Food wasn't important to him anymore. In fact, he had lost his appetite ever since Michelle's death. He sat in his own room, not talking. It would be this way for a very long time.

The color in Lance's cheeks had drained to a white, pale color. His eyes had evident bags under them, and he had lost some weight since four days ago. He had read Michelle's letter over a million times, trying to comprehend it into his brain. He just couldn't. Lance reached out and grabbed the pictures he and Michelle had together. They were his last pictures of them together, his last memories of them being together.

"I was going to take her to our last prom together," he said gravely to himself, staring down at those pictures. He didn't cry. He was too sick to cry anymore. "She was going to go to a wonderful college, and have a wonderful career…and I ruined all of that for her. It's all my fault that this happened." He didn't care what anyone said. He felt that it was his own fault that Michelle had gotten pregnant.

Their History project lay on his night table. He gulped, looking at it. It was perfect. It was the last thing Michelle had given to him before she left. They had worked hard together to complete it. Why did she do it? Why the hell did she do it! Lance asked himself, not knowing why. It was completely selfish…Everyone loved her. Hell, if only she knew how much I loved her. I would have been there for here and supported her if she had told me that she was pregnant. He buried his face into a pillow.

Suddenly there was a soft knocking on his door. "Lance?" Mrs. Bass asked from outside. "Are you okay? Do you want to come out?"

"No! Leave me alone!" Lance shouted back, trying to keep the anger out of his voice. "I don't want to leave my room."

"Honey," Mrs. Bass said with sympathy, "you can't stay in there forever."

"Well, too bad. I am," Lance argued. "Please leave me alone now."

"Lance," Mrs. Bass tried again. "Don't you want to talk?"

"No."

"Aren't you hungry?"

"No!"

Mrs. Bass sighed desperately and leaned against his doorway. "You can lock yourself up like that anymore. I won't let you do it. You haven't eaten for almost a week. It's not right."

"I don't care anymore," Lance scoffed. "Nothing matters to me anymore."

"No, you don't mean that."

"I do mean it! Nothing matters now that Michelle is gone. I don't have anything. I don't care about anything."

"Lance," Mrs. Bass pleaded. "I know how upset you are. We're all deeply saddened by the loss of Michelle. I know how deeply it affected you."

"No, you don't," Lance snapped. "Now go away, Mom."

"If you'd-"

"Mom, I need time. You don't understand! Michelle meant everything to me. I liked her ever since I first met her. I loved her so much. You couldn't possibly know how much pain I am going through right now. And for her to do what she did-well, it broke my heart. She didn't tell me she was in trouble. She didn't tell me she was pregnant. She didn't tell me that she was going to hang herself!"

Lance felt nauseous. He couldn't stand it anymore. What was the point of life? It wasn't fair, and it made him sick.

"Okay," Mrs. Bass finally relented. "I'll let you be alone."

"Mom? Sorry I yelled at you," Lance apologized, feeling shameful. He never had an outburst at his Mom.

"It's okay, honey. I understand," Mrs. Bass replied. She could almost see Lance through the door, staring out his window in misery. She bit her lip and walked down the stairs, feeling sorry for her son.