Jimmy looked up from the papers at his desk as the door to the office opened. He smiled at the woman standing there and quickly stood.

"Hello Polly, everything alright?"

"Everything’s fine," she answered. He knew what he wanted to know, but couldn’t bring himself to ask. "Alexis is watchin’ the saloon, I actually came to bring you something."

"Now Polly," he protested. "I ain’t got much room for anything else. Between you, Rachel and Lou, I got more furniture and things than a man like me could possibly have need for."

"Well, this is just one little thing. I think it’s only right you have it, considering your job now."

They walked outside and Jimmy stopped short as he saw what was in the wagon. When he moved into the rooms behind the jail three days ago, Polly took one look at the furnishings and declared they’d never do. Rachel and Lou agreed and so they all gave him a few things, a sofa and some dishes from Rachel and Janus, some linens and a table from Lou and Polly gave him a few things. But this was too much.

"No Polly," he said shaking his head. "I can’t take it. It belongs to you, I really can’t."

"Darlin’ I want you to have it. It was his and he would want you to have it, I know he would."

"That’s the thing Polly, it was his."

She stopped at the back of the wagon and looked at him. "Do you remember what I told you that night? Teaspoon used to sit in this chair and think over his cases. When I saw you sittin’ in it, I thought you were a perfect match for it. So I want you to have it. Now are you going to help me or are you just going to stand there?"

"I’ll help you," Jimmy said with a chuckle. "Now I know why you and Teapsoon got back together. You both could talk a fox out of its hole if you set your minds to it."

"Don’t worry sugar, you’re not far behind in that regards. She’ll come around."

Jimmy nearly dropped the chair, but managed to keep his grip. Leave it to Polly to hit on what he really was worried about. Alexis hadn’t spoken to him since the day of the fight with Kid. He didn’t know how to reach her. She worked at Polly’s bar, went straight home and didn’t spend time with anyone. She seemed determined to push everyone, especially him, away and he didn’t understand why.

"Thanks Polly," he said once they got the chair inside. "Thanks for everything."

"No problem Jimmy. You want to come over for supper tonight?"

"No, I gotta work. That deputy that Teaspoon had, well, I don’t understand why he kept him. I gotta find a replacement."

"Well, perhaps he could help," Polly said as she gestured to the man climbing off his horse outside. "If you decide you want to come over, you know you’re welcome."

"Thanks Polly, I’ll see you later."

She breezed out the door calling her good-byes over her shoulder. Buck watched her go and then walked inside.

"Hey Jimmy," he said, looking around the room. "They sure fixed you up nice here didn’t they?"

Jimmy joined in with Buck’s laughter. "Yeah, don’t know what they think I’m going to do with half this stuff. It’s not like I even cook here. Polly or Rachel are always bringing food by for me."

"Sounds like them," Buck agreed as they walked into the office and sat down. "How are you likin’ the job?"

"It’s different than bein’ the deputy, but it’s fine. Gotta find me another deputy though. The one Teaspoon had just ain’t workin’ out. How come you or Kid never worked here?"

Buck leaned back in his chair, "We’d help out on occasion, but Kid’s been pretty busy with the ranch. And now with the baby comin’ Lou wants him to be around. And me, well, I didn’t stick around here all the time. I’d go and see my brother and my people."

Jimmy sat silently for a moment before he asked, "Did I step on your toes, takin’ this job when I just got back into town?"

A moment passed before Buck shook his head. "No. It seems right. You and Teaspoon seem like you were made for the law. You belong here as the marshal."

"Thank you Buck," Jimmy said. Then leaning forward he said, "I just got one more question. You wanna be my deputy?"

Alexis opened the door and stopped in her tracks. She should have known it would only be a matter of time before Polly did something. Ever since the day at Kid and Lou’s, Alexis had refused to talk about the fight. She’d gone to work in Polly’s bar, talked late at night with her friend about Teaspoon, but she refused to discuss what happened. Nor did they talk about Jimmy. He stopped by occasionally to see Polly, but he and Alexis hardly spoke. Alexis was only surprised that it took Polly a week to do something.

Forcing a smile she greeted the ladies in the room. "Hello."

"Hi Alexis," Lou said with a smile.

"How was work today?" Rachel asked as she moved over on the settee.

"Oh, it was all right," Alexis answered. Resigned to the fact that she couldn’t just slip off to her room, she joined the blond woman and looked up when Polly offered her a cup of tea.

"Thank you," she said, accepting the cup.

The four women sat in the room listening to the fire and the wind whistling over the chimney. Alexis kept her gaze focused on her cup, even long after the liquid inside was gone.

"Alexis?" Lou said, finally breaking the silence.

Her head came up and she stared tiredly at her friend. She’d been working herself to the bone every day, and she wasn’t sleeping at nights. Polly had told her firmly that morning that she was only to work a few hours and then come home. The tone in Polly’s voice stifled any argument Alexis had before it was even raised.

Getting no response, but finally having her friend’s attention Lou continued, "I’m sorry for Kid."

"Yeah," Alexis said non-committally.

"Really, I am. What he said was way out of line, and I told him so, often."

"I don’t blame you Lou. And I’m sorry for not spending more time with you, especially after I promised I’d help out with the baby comin’ and all. It’s just…" she trailed off, unable to continue. It was partly that she didn’t want to see Kid, but seeing Lou pregnant and knowing that could never be her was too painful right now.

"I know," Lou answered. "Teresa’s been helpin’ out a lot, and so has Rachel."

Guilt swept over Alexis and she turned to Rachel. "I’m sorry. You’ve got Adelle to take care of. I told Lou I’d help her out, I really should be doing it. No matter what happened between Kid and me."

A smile crossed Rachel’s lips and she said, "Alexis, Lou didn’t tell you that to make you feel guilty. I can help Lou and still take care of Adelle. We’re just worried about you is all."

Her head sunk to her chest and Alexis closed her eyes. She didn’t want to have to do this, not now, not ever.

"Darlin’ you’re makin’ yourself sick. You’re not eating, you’re not sleeping and you’re working to the point of exhaustion," Polly said. "You can’t go on like this. And I know it’s not just Kid."

Slowly Alexis raised her head. Her eyes pleaded with Polly to not go on, but this time Polly refused to heed the request. For a week she’d backed away every time she tried to reach out because Alexis warded her off with her eyes. Well today was the end of that. She’d let the young woman wallow in her emotions for too long, it was time to bring it all out in the open so they could deal with it.

"You’re pushing Jimmy away, and if you keep pushing he may not be there when you want him."

Want him. She did want him. The problem was, she couldn’t allow herself to be with him. But she couldn’t say that to Polly, not with Lou present. She couldn’t spoil this moment, this baby for Lou, it wouldn’t be fair to her.

"I need some space," she said weakly.

"I know you’re hurt about Rosemary," Lou said, "But it’s over between them. Jimmy told me that."

"He took the marshal’s position. Would he have done that if he was plannin’ on leaving any time soon?" Rachel asked.

Alexis shook her head no and Polly smiled. "He just wants a chance, darlin’. You don’t have to take him back, but you can at least be his friend."

Alexis nodded her head slightly. It felt like an order, though she knew Polly didn’t mean it like that. She had treated Jimmy badly. Maybe if she was at least polite to him, and stopped avoiding him, everyone would stop pushing her so hard. She wouldn’t take him back, that was simply out of the question. However, she could be nicer to him, that wouldn’t kill her, would it?

"All right," she said, slowly nodding again. "It was good to see you two again, I’m just very tired."

"Of course you are," Rachel said.

Alexis wearily stood and slowly walked out of the room. Inside her room she sat on the bed as she unlaced her boots. Polly and the others were right. She had to stop acting like this. She could be polite and friendly, it didn’t mean she had to encourage Jimmy’s advances, she just had to stop pushing him away so hard. She knew that the harder she pushed, the harder Jimmy would push back. She just had to find a happy balance.

The door opened and Jimmy slapped his hand down on his desk to keep the papers on top from blowing away. The wind was picking up outside and he figured a storm was on it’s way. The one nice thing about that was it would keep people inside. He might actually be able to finish getting the office in order. Having Buck as a reliable deputy was definitely helping there.

He was amazed at how easily they were working together. He feared there might be some slight chaffing, now that he was Buck’s boss instead a fellow deputy to Teaspoon. But there weren’t any problems. From the start Jimmy had treated him much more like a partner than a deputy, and Buck had accepted it.

"Hello Jimmy."

Jimmy brought his head up and tried not to stare. He had expected the opening door to bring Buck back from settling some disturbance at the hotel. Instead, Kid was standing inside the doorway, unbuttoning his coat.

"Kid," Jimmy said with a nod. "If you’re lookin’ for Buck he’s over at the hotel."

"Good. I was kinda hopin’ I could talk to you without him around."

Jimmy nodded and indicated for Kid to take a seat at Buck’s desk.

"I wanted to apologize, for that day at out at the ranch."

"Well, I really think you should be apologizin’ to Alexis."

Kid swallowed and nodded his head. "I know. I’m going to. Believe me, I’ve gotten an earful everyday from Lou ‘bout that. But I wanted to apologize to you also."

"Alright," Jimmy said evenly. He felt he owed it to Lou to try and smooth over his relationship with Kid. He didn’t want her worrying about their animosity.

"I wasn’t really angry at Alexis, she was just an easy target. Like you said. I was mad at you. You took off, we never heard from you, not even once, and suddenly after Teaspoon’s death you showed up. And it’s like you’re not even sorry for all the hurt you caused everybody when you left. Now, you’ve suddenly become the marshal."

Kid let out a breath and Jimmy calmly sat there. He wanted to strike back and say he shouldn’t have to explain himself to anybody, but Kid was here, reaching out and he knew that he needed to do the same.

"It was wrong of me to leave like I did," Jimmy finally said. "At the time it seemed right. I know I should have kept in touch, and I really wish I had. I hate that I never made things right between Teaspoon and me, especially after all he helped me. Things hadn’t been right in my life for a while, so when Alexis showed up and told me about Teaspoon I just felt like I had to come. Bein’ back here has felt right. Same with takin’ the job. Do you feel I should have asked you first, were you wantin’ the position?"

Kid shook his head, "No, I didn’t want the job, not with the baby comin’ and all now. I’m too busy with the ranch."

He stopped and sighed. "I don’t know Jimmy, I was so angry with you for so long. I just don’t want to hold on to that anger anymore."

The door opened, and Jimmy watched helplessly as the papers flew off his desk and onto the floor. So much for all that work. Buck closed the door and regarded the two men sitting across from each other.

"Everything all right here?" he asked with a little wariness.

"Everything’s fine," Jimmy assured him and also Kid. "Kid and me are just sortin’ some things out."

"I came to apologize," Kid added.

"And?" Buck asked Jimmy pointedly.

"Well, I once said apologizin’ is something I only do on Sundays. But I think I can make an exception in this case. I’m sorry too Kid, for a lot of things. But I’m home now."

"Welcome home then," Kid said standing.

"Thanks Kid. I really stayed away too long."

"Finally," Buck breathed out, causing both men to look at him. "I’m glad the two of you came to your senses, and so peaceful like too. I’da hated having to lock both of you up for disturbing the peace."

"Wanted to keep your job?" Jimmy asked with a smile.

"No, wanted to keep my skin. I’da had four angry women after me if I’d thrown you two in jail."

The three men laughed and then Kid turned. "I better get goin’. Lou’s over at Polly’s and I wanna get back home before this storm hits."

He opened the door and Jimmy winced as the sound of more papers flying off the desk caught his ears. Buck laughed after the door was closed and Jimmy started gathering up the papers while grumbling. "Never knew there was so much paperwork involved, did you?"

Jimmy tried to scowl, but couldn’t quite keep a straight face. Things had gone surprisingly well with Kid and he just couldn’t keep his relief or his pleasure from showing through.

Alexis looked up from polishing the already spotless bar and stifled an exasperated groan when she saw Jimmy through the door. It had been nearly a week since the talk with Polly, Lou and Rachel and she was trying very hard to keep the polite rapport going with Jimmy. She’d hoped that once she stopped being so antagonistic towards him that he let up on his pursuit. He seemed to take her talking to him as an encouragement and now came to Polly’s bar at least once a day, and always at the times that she was working.

He smiled a greeting and bellied up to the corner of the bar where he could stand and watch the room. He really is getting this marshal bit down, Alexis thought as she walked towards him.

"Afternoon, Marshal," she said with a nod of her head. "What can I get you?"

"Lunch with the barkeep," Jimmy replied, the smile still on his face.

"Well, I’d love to, but you know the place is really packed today."

Jimmy turned and looked at the two men sitting at the only occupied table. "Oh, I don’t think they’d mind if you took a moment from your busy schedule, would you boys?"

"Fine," she sighed. "Let me guess, cheese sandwich and a sarsaparilla."

"You really do know me too well ‘Lexis."

"Well I took a chance, considerin’ it’s the same thing you’ve ordered every day."

It really was easy to slip into a comfortable banter with Jimmy despite her every intention not to. However this lunch proved to be different. Alexis stopped mid-bite when the door opened up again and Kid stepped inside. He looked at Jimmy and tipped his hat and then smiled nervously at Alexis. She’d heard Jimmy and Kid had reached a truce of sorts, and now it seemed he’d come to make amends with her.

"Jimmy, Alexis," Kid greeted them as he reached the bar.

"Hello Kid," Jimmy returned before taking another bite.

"How’s Lou doin’?" Alexis asked.

"She’s doin’ real good," Kid replied with a grin. "Doctor thinks it’ll only be a week or two more."

"Does she need something?" Alexis asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

"No, actually I came to see you."

Alexis and Kid looked over as Jimmy mumbled around his sandwich and fixed a meaningful look at Kid.

Kid caught the look and quickly said, "I’ve been meanin’ to come by sooner. But a few of the horses took sick and it was real busy there for a while."

He paused and nervously played with the brim of his hat while watching Jimmy out of the corner of his eye. Jimmy swallowed the bite of sandwich and casually reached for the bottle of sarsaparilla.

"Do you have a moment to talk?" Kid asked.

Alexis looked at Kid, and then to the pathetically populated bar. There was no excuse for her not to talk with Kid, except for her overwhelming desire not to. She just didn’t want to have to relive the fight with him, and the painful memories of her past that it awakened.

"I’ll watch things here," Jimmy said, noticing her glances. "You go ahead and talk."

He watched as they walked to a table in the far corner and sat down. Lou must have kept at him to come talk to Alexis. Kid had a slight hound dog expression around his eyes. He just hoped that Alexis would sit still long enough to listen. Trying to pin her down in one place lately was like trying to nail down the wind.

As the conversation progressed he finished his lunch and then turned his eyes to scan the street out the window. Every few minutes he would glance back to the corner table. Alexis looked deflated, sitting slouched in the chair, her hands carelessly playing with the bar rag she’d unwittingly taken with her. He felt someone walk up beside him and didn’t need to look to see who it was.

"Hi Polly," he said as his eyes drifted back to the corner before resting on her.

"You workin’ here now as well?" she asked with a smile, her eyes drifting toward the corner of the room even as she asked the question.

"Nope, just holdin’ down the bar while they talk."

"Everythin’ going alright?"

"Well, no one’s shouted yet and she hasn’t bolted from the room, so I’d say that’s a good sign."

"Well, finally," Polly breathed out. "Guess we’ll have to take what we can get. You have someone waiting for you at the office, by the way."

He turned his head and looked at her. "Who?"

"Louise," Polly told him. "Must have come into town with Kid."

"Thanks Polly," he said. "Guess I better go then."

She nodded and moved behind the bar as he walked toward the door.

From her seat, Alexis’s eye caught the movement of him leaving. She looked up as he left, and wondered if something was wrong. She shot a look toward the bar and sank even farther into her seat as she saw Polly straightening the bottles Alexis had already straightened that morning. With Polly here she didn’t have an excuse to end the conversation with Kid and so steeled herself as Kid continued to talk and offer amends.

Silence. Pure and utter silence. Alexis sat at the now empty table and reveled in the comfort of solitude and peace. She really wasn’t angry with Kid. She’d gotten over that, and knew he truly hadn’t been mad at her. Tensions were high that day; things were said that they hadn’t meant. She had avoided talking to Kid because of the unwanted memories of Robert. Those memories were harder to tap back into the corner than she liked.

So peace had been forged, and Kid had left to attend to errands. The bar was quiet still, only a few more patrons had drifted inside. The long winter was keeping all but the most determined customers and a few drifters at bay. Judging by the darkening clouds and the shrill wind picking up outside, there wouldn’t be a run of customers tonight.

She continued to stare out the window and cursed the lengthy winter. The stifling weight in her chest felt heavier as she gazed on the leaden skies. She wished these storms would break and Spring would come. She wanted to see grass and flowers again instead of snow and frozen ground.

"You look tired," Polly said as she dropped lightly into the chair across from Alexis.

The younger woman tore her gaze from the window and regarded her friend. "I suppose I am. Still haven’t been sleeping well."

"Why don’t you head on home. Maybe now you’ll be able to get some rest. Sure doesn’t seem like we’ll be busy tonight."

With a heavy sigh Alexis took her dismissal and rose to gather her things. She moved toward the door, buttoning her coat as she returned the few good-byes the customers directed at her. Slipping the last wooden button into place before opening the door, she was grateful for the heavy wool of the coat as the wind caught her skirts and pinned them against her legs. Catching her breath, she turned towards Polly’s house seeking the shortest route home. She knew it would take her by the Marshal’s office and normally she would avoid it, but today she just wanted out of the wind.

Rounding the corner the wind knocked her full in the face. But that wasn’t what stopped her short and ripped the breath from her chest. Jimmy was standing on the boardwalk next to Lou, who was very heavy with child. The scene and Jimmy’s next action proved to be the final straw for Alexis that day.

"You sure you don’t want to wait inside Lou?" Jimmy asked again.

"I’m sure Jimmy," she said as she shook her head. "Kid should be comin’ any moment now and it’s best I get a head start on my walking."

Jimmy tried to swallow his laugh, but Lou noticed it.

"Go ahead and laugh, but some day your wife is going to be just like me. Laugh at her and you’ll be sleeping on couch."

Jimmy blinked and ruefully shook his head. That’s not gonna happen any time soon the way things are goin’. "You sure you’re not cold?"

Laughter bubbled up from Lou. "Yes Jimmy, in fact it feels nice out here."

"Nice?" he asked as the wind tugged at his jacket.

"Yes," she replied. "I feel like I’m trapped next to the stove in July. I’m hot, and before you ask, I don’t want to sit down. It’s hard to find a comfortable position and the chairs in there aren’t exactly the softest things."

"Alright," Jimmy said in surrender. "You know best. I’ll just stand here and…"

His words trailed off as he watched Lou start and then shift her position. "Are you alright?"

She smiled to ease the worry in his voice and his brow. "I’m fine. The baby just kicked."

His eyebrows rose as he asked, "Does it hurt?"

She shook her head and said, "No, not like if I kicked you. Do you want to feel?"

Jimmy tried to swallow past the lump that suddenly formed in his throat. "Feel it?"

"The kick? The baby’s still kickin’."

Jimmy hedged, wanting to feel it and yet not sure if he should be touching Lou’s stomach. Finally curiosity won out and he reached out to touch. She guided his hand and held it place as they waited and then he felt it. A solid THUMP against the palm of his hand. His face split with a huge grin of wonder and amazement.

"That’s…that’s incredible Lou," he said as he drew his hand back.

She smiled and nodded, as her eyes scanned the streets looking for a sign of Kid. She was tired and wanted to go home and rest. She recognized Alexis standing by the building kitty-corner across from the office. There was a look of pure despair on her face and Lou was immediately worried. She reached out to draw Jimmy’s attention when Alexis spun around and fled.

"Jimmy?" she said, her eyes not leaving Alexis’s retreating form.

His head snapped around at the worry in her tone. "What’s wrong Lou?"

"Alexis, she was standin’ over there," she said as she indicated, "and then she suddenly left."

Jimmy raised his eyes and caught a glimpse of her dark hair weaving erratically through the people on the boardwalk. He listened as Lou recited seeing her and her expression and then Alexis suddenly fleeing. He wanted to go after her, he needed to go after her and find out what was wrong.

"Lou…"

"Go."

He gave her a thankful glance and then stepped off the boardwalk. He crossed the street and with long strides moved to close the distance between him and Alexis. Suddenly he felt that Rock Creek was teaming with people and he wanted to shout for everyone to move out of his way. He watched as she passed the last of the buildings and kept going, stumbling as she hit the uneven ground.

Reaching the edge of town, Jimmy paused for a moment. Alexis was stumbling as she pushed forward at a furious pace. Her motions were filled with desperation and Jimmy weighed the merits of having the town marshal go sprinting full-speed away from town. He set off quickly after her, worried and anxious to keep her in his sight. It wasn’t until he realized where she was going that he slowed his pace.

It was a knife to her heart. The look on Jimmy’s face as he placed his hand on Lou’s stomach. It had to be to the feel the baby move and the sudden smile and the joy that radiated from his body just made Alexis want to crumple to the ground. She saw Lou look in her direction and she just couldn’t stay there. Home was forgotten. She just had to leave, get away, far away from Jimmy, from the prying eyes of the town, from this blinding pain inside her.

She turned and wove her way through the people heading about their shopping, trying to get it done before the impending storm. Fighting the tears as she walked she didn’t care where her feet carried her, she just had to keep moving. When she reached the edge of town, she continued on, free to walk faster now that she didn’t have to worry about avoiding people.

Her brain finally realized where her feet were leading and gave them free reign. Gathering up her skirts, Alexis began to run as the tears finally came. When she reached the white fence she leaned heavily against it, trying to catch her breath. Slowly pushing away, she walked through the gate and up to the one person she thought would be able to help her, that is if he had been alive.

Falling to the ground next to Teaspoon’s grave she curled up onto her side. Tears streamed down her face, collecting on the frozen soil. She ignored the biting wind as she stared plaintively at the grave marker, desperately wishing she could speak to him instead of his grave.

"Please help me Teaspoon," she whispered. "I don’t know what to do anymore. If you were here you’d know just what to say."

Moments passed as tears continued to fall. It was almost calming to her to simply be surrounded by the silence, except for the crashing emotions inside her. Voices played out in her mind, growing louder, shouting to be heard over the rising wind. The voices simply would not still to let her rest and she had to speak in order to release them.

"You’d be the one person who could talk to Jimmy," she said, laying her hand on the ground, her eyes closed. "You could explain this to him, make him understand why it could never work out between us. I don’t want to hurt him Teaspoon. I love him too much to do that, but he just won’t accept it, and he keeps pushin’. He seems so sincere, like he really has changed and wants to start again. But I just can’t.

"You should have seen his face. He lit up like a bonfire when he felt the baby move. I can’t give that to him, and he’ll leave just like everyone else. I can’t let him break my heart again Teaspoon"

Slowly Jimmy approached the cemetery, biding his time, trying to allow Alexis some privacy before he showed up. He understood her need to be here. There had been a few early mornings before the town shook off its sleep that he had slipped out to talk to his mentor and friend. Teaspoon had left a lasting impression on both his life and Alexis’s, and to him it was natural for them to seek out his advice.

As he approached the entrance to the graveyard, he paused. Alexis was lying on the ground, curled up like a child, sobs shaking her body. He was reminded of the day they visited his grave and she cried for the first time. Jimmy had clearly seen her grief and anguish, but now, there was something there besides the loss of Teaspoon.

Alexis was dressed in a blue dress and she made a deep contrast to the stark, frozen earth looking like a discarded flower. He heard her voice carried to him on the wind, but he couldn’t make out the words. There was an internal war between going to her and letting her have her space, but the war was brief. For too long he had stepped back and not pushed too far beyond her warning signs. Today he couldn’t do that.

He longed to see the remembered spark and life in her eyes. It was missing, and he felt that an important part of her was hiding along with that vibrancy. He had fallen in love with her fight and her love for life, but now he felt that that essential piece was missing from her. It was as if her will to live had been abandoned, and he was determined to help her find it again.

Walking up to Alexis, Jimmy knelt beside her and cradled her in his arms. She stiffened momentarily and then melted into chest as she wrapped her arms around him. She gasped for breath and finally managed to speak, "Teaspoon?"

He sagged slightly, disappointed that she had not called his name and said softly, "No ‘Lexis, it’s me."

She stiffened again and pushed her arms against his chest, tearing herself out of his embrace. "Jimmy? What are you doing here?"

"I’m worried about you ‘Lexis. Lou saw you in town and when you suddenly turned and walked away we became worried," he told her. Then a thought flashed through his mind. "What happened with Kid after I left?"

"Nothin’," she spit out at him. "We talked, civilly, he apologized, we worked things out. If that’s what you and Lou were wonderin’, well you can go back and tell her she doesn’t have anythin’ to worry about."

Jimmy rocked back and rested on his heels. The sudden venom in her voice when talking about Kid and Lou surprised him. If things were settled between her and Kid why did she seem to be exuding anger in regards to him and Lou?

"’Lexis?"

"Stop calling me that!" she screamed at him, backing further away. "You have no right to call me that."

Even more confused, Jimmy tried to reach out to her, but she shrank away. "Alexis, maybe you should go back to town, talk to Polly or Lou?"

"Would you stop throwing her in my face?" Alexis shrieked, her voice matching the wind in it’s discordant howling.

"What?" Jimmy questioned. "Lou?"

"Yes!"

"Alexis, Lou is married to Kid. They’re going to have a baby. What does she have to do with us?"

"I know she’s going to have a baby. I know that! I saw you with her Jimmy. I saw you feel the baby move. I saw how happy you were. Don’t you see, that’s why there can be no us?"

Shaking his head slowly as he tried to make sense of what she was saying, Jimmy said, "No Alexis, I don’t understand. What does Kid and Lou havin’ a baby have to do with us?"

"Because," she screamed, and then lowered her voice. "Because you deserve to be with someone who can make you happy like that."

Jimmy’s dreams surfaced in his mind, dreams of them having children. "But ‘Lexis, that can be us. I know I hurt you, but that can be us. You just have to give us a chance."

"No, Jimmy," she said, her voice growing even softer and agony crossing her features. "That can’t be us. That can never be us."

"’Lexis, you’re not makin’ any sense sweetheart."

"I can’t have children Jimmy. I can never have children. Robert made sure of that."

Alexis looked at Jimmy and her heart shattered like dropped pottery. He looked stricken, blinking and shaking his head, but worst of all, he’d moved further away from her. Just like all the others, she thought. This was why she had pushed him, refused to give in to his advances, she tried to protect herself from just this moment, and stupidly she had hoped that Jimmy would different.

"I knew it," she said, causing Jimmy’s eyes to focus on her instead of the ground in between them. "You’re just like all the others. Every man who’s ever found out has run for the hills. You’re just like them. If a woman can’t be your breed mare then you want nothin’ to do with her."

Jimmy’s eyes widened in surprise, but Alexis saw the look as embarrassment over the truth of her words. Hurt over being so vulnerable in front of Jimmy quickly to turned to anger in self-preservation.

"This is why I pushed you away Jimmy. And I was right to do so. I can’t have your children and now you want to get away from me. Well, just go! Go find someone who can give you a house full of children. Go back to Rosemary if you want."

"I don’t want Rosemary," Jimmy finally said, breaking his silence. "I don’t want her, don’t you see that? I want you. I love you."

Alexis snorted softly in disbelief.

Jimmy leaned towards her and tried to reach for her hand, but she kept it out of his grasp. "I love you, ‘Lexis. I don’t love Rosemary, I never did. I know I hurt you when I left, and if I could go back and change that, I would. But I can’t change it, all I can do is say I’m sorry and move forward if you’ll let us."

"Why should I believe you?" she asked, her visage starting to crack.

"Because it’s the truth. I’m not leavin’ ‘Lexis. I’m not leaving you ever again."

Alexis shook her head. Part of her wanting desperately to believe, and yet not allowing herself to. She couldn’t have children. He hadn’t said it, but she knew that was important to him. How could she believe him to stick around when she could never give that to him?

Reading her thoughts, which played clearly across her face, Jimmy leaned closer. "I’m sorry you can’t have children ‘Lexis. But that doesn’t matter to me. If Robert wasn’t already dead, I’d shoot him myself for what he did to you, for causing you this hurt."

Tears began to flow down her face as the hurt and anger bled off, combined with an odd relief that Jimmy finally knew the truth. Her body began to shake and Jimmy pulled her to him, hugging her tightly.

"I love you ‘Lexis, and I’m not goin’ anywhere."

She pushed back slightly, not out of his embrace, but enough that she could look up into his face. The question was knit into her brow, begging to hear the reassurance once again.

"It doesn’t matter if you can’t have children, ‘Lexis," he said as he pulled her close again. "I love you."

She began to shake again, and it wasn’t until he heard her teeth chatter together did Jimmy realize that she wasn’t just crying. The wind had continued to increase and the temperature was dropping and Alexis was now shaking with the chill that came from sitting on the frozen earth. He looked down as she moved to wipe her face and noticed she wasn’t wearing gloves.

He quickly took off his gloves and pressed his hands over hers, feeling the icy cold penetrate his skin. He rubbed her hands gently with his own and then tucked them into the folds of her skirt to keep them sheltered. Then he moved his hands to her face to wipe away the tears. Feeling how cold they were he cupped his hands together, blew his warm breath into them and then rubbed them vigorously together. He placed them gently on her cheeks and held them there.

Alexis felt a shudder course through her body when he placed his hands on her cheeks. She had submitted easily as he warmed her hands and placed them in the material of her skirt. He was tender, caring and his actions spoke volumes to her heart. When he placed his hands on her cheeks, her body couldn’t help but respond to the intimacy of the act. Her brain finally seemed to process the words that he had told her. He loved her and it didn’t matter to him if she couldn’t have children. That thought ran over and over through her mind and she raised her eyes to meet Jimmy’s.

Her breath caught in her throat as the concern, love and passion danced in his warm, dark eyes. "I love you Jimmy."

The words tripped off her tongue catching them both by surprise. Jimmy’s eyes locked onto hers and she finally stopped hiding her feelings. She let her eyes reflect the love clearly displayed in his. Gently pulling her face towards him, he lowered his head and brushed his lips across hers. Capturing them fully, Jimmy continued to kiss her as he pulled Alexis closer. She wrapped her arms around him and returned his kiss with equal intensity.

On to Chapter 17!