by Ms Raye
Lou finished her chores and wiped her forehead with the back of her hand. She waved to Noah and Cody as they rode back in from Town, supplies loaded in the back of the wagon. They called out to her as they neared. "Hey Lou!" called Cody.
"Lou," Noah tipped his hat. "You done?"
"Yep, chores all finished!"
"After we put the supplies up, you want to swim with us? The water looks damn good today."
A broad smile spread over her dust streaked features, "Sure, sounds good."
"Lou!" Lou's eyes closed as she heard Kid's voice, "Hey Lou, hold up!"
Lou clapped her hand on the side of the wagon, "Better go on without me."
Cody shrugged his shoulders and turned the horses toward the house.
"Kid?" she looked at him, square in the eye, and he found his steps unsure.
"Ah, Lou? You got a minute?"
"Actually? No, I've got a ride in an hour... can you let me clean up first and I'll meet you in the barn."
About a half an hour later Lou was fresh from her shower and dressed for her ride. Jimmy wasn't due back until tomorrow, and Lou had a feeling that she was going to need to talk to him.
She walked Lightning into the open area and saddled up. Everything was finished when she heard the door open, "You have a minute?"
He sounded so unsure, Lou had to shake her head in amazement. This was a different man than the Kid she knew and lo- she stopped herself. Her feelings for the last few weeks had caused her no shortage of grief. She knew she needed some time to sort stuff out, and Kid wasn't giving her a lot of room.
"Lou?" she brought her gaze up to meet his.
"Yeah Kid, I'm ready."
He moved a bit closer but still stayed back about an arm's length... "I ah..." he laughed under his breath, "heck, this is hard."
"Jimmy and I were talkin'" Lou took in a deep breath, "and uh, he said..."
Lou looked around the barn... this was was not turning out well, "and..." she prompted, her foot tapping out a beat on the hay strewn floor.
"And I was wondering...." Then Kid lay it out on the table, "Why have the two of you been spendin' so much time together? Is there something I should know?"
"It's really simple, " she started... and for once, the words seemed to fall into place, "I like who I am when I'm with him."
Kid hung his head and clasped his hands in his lap, "And you don't like who you are with me?" he asked, almost as a joke.
Lou felt ashamed, but she had to admit, "No, I don't. Not lately."
Kid stared at her like she had grown a third eye, "What's changed between us?"
"Us? Just that fact that I want to like me." She could see she wasn't quite reaching him. "We call you 'the KID', but the way you treat me -- that's what I feel like!"
"Lou," he scoffed gently, "You're almost a grown woman."
"When I'm with you, I don't feel like a woman at all," she shook her head. "Heck, most times I don't feel like a person either."
"Lou," he reached out to touch her shoulder, "How can you say that? Together --"
"We're not together- you order and I'm expected to obey - heel, stay - sitting around, totally useless." She shook off his hand and stood - laying her hat on her head. "Kid, you treat Katy with more common respect that you offer me."
"Rider Coming!" called Buck from the yard.
Lou mounted Lightning, her back ramrod straight and without a backward glance she rode forward, arm outstretched like she had done hundreds of times before. The mochila came into her hand and she was off, the wind warm across her face.
Two long strides and she smiled. She felt free, reborn. She began to respect herself.
This story is copyright 2000 and may not be posted or reproduced without the author's permission.