Crowe People Movie Wish List
This list is yet another offering from the talented
members of the Clan of the Crowe People. We all
know any movie ever made could be improved if
Russell Crowe was a member of the cast, so have a look
at the synopsis of these films to see some of the
changes we might suggest...
From Meredith:
- Attack of the Crowepeople:
The poor lad is lured into our cave and then
molested by hordes of lusty wild women!!!
From Jo Cimelli:
- The Crowe, the Wet and the Dirty:
An epic western of lust in the dust...
- Raiders of the Wet Crowe:
A fun packed adventure yarn where the Clanners
set out to steal Russ' wet underwear...
- Crowe's List:
It nourishes and sustains us...
- The Crowe Brief:
A searing legal thriller in which Clanners fight in
the courts for the right to keep Russell's
wet underwear...
- The Australian Patient:
A love story set against a backdrop of a
terrific game of doctors and nurses...
- The Unbearable Distance of Crowe:
A haunting tale of one fan's determination to see
Mystery Alaska in Iceland...
- Crowe in Love:
An oscar winning tale of a songwriter who finds
inspiration and love from an avid fan...
- The Crowe Files:
An investigation into the strange ocurrence of
Crowespeak appearing on hundreds of PC terminals
around the world-especially those on the Crowe List...
- Out of Australia:
"Once I had a farm in Australia..."(another accent
for Meryl to master)
- Ivancrowe:
A brave knight battles to save the true love of his life.
- The Crowe-man Show:
A man living in a media-induced
fantasy world finally breaks free to live a real life
with the woman of his dreams...
- Crowe-meo and Joanne:
Two star-crossed lovers have a passionate romance which
doesn't end with a double suicide pact for a change!
- The Russell Crowe Affair:
(or for our American friends-The Crowe Caper)
a filmed adaptation of my memoires - well a girl
can dream can't she?)
From Kim Davis:
- Crowe Force One:
A young woman travelling to Australia to meet her
favorite actor, finds her plane taken over by
terrorists. The actor, who just happens to be on the
same flight, takes on the terrorists and gets the girl.
- Lady and the Crowe:
A couple share love and laughter (not to mention a
huge plate of spaghetti) in this delightful film.
- A Room With a Crowe:
A woman takes a trip to Italy and discovers that
her room has been given to someone else (Russell).
They agree to share the room (and much more)
for the duration.
- When Russell met Kimmi:
A couple meet...fight...meet again...
become best friends and eventually fall in
love in this Romantic Comedy.
From Allie:
- Miser-russ (like Misery):
An actor has a car accident in a snowstorm and is rescued
by his "#1 fan" (i.e., me). She nurses him back to
health (visions of spongebaths dance in my head)
and cheers his spirits by acting out scenes from her
favorite movies - you know which ones I mean ;)
When he's all better, he decides that he cannot
leave this angel of mercy who has rescued him, because
he has fallen in love with her. So they get married
and live happily ever after.
- The Good, the Bad, and the Crowe:
The hunt is on for a million dollars
in gold, buried somewhere in a cemetary in the Old West. Russell, delightfully dusty again, hands out
ass-whuppin's
left and right as others try to beat him
to the gold. Of course he wins, and
rides off into the sunset.
- Good Crowe Hunting:
A brilliant but tortured man is unable to come to
terms with his great mental gifts because of an
abused childhood. He is aided by a
beautiful college student, who he falls in love with
but still pushes away. He is helped by a hairy
psychiatrist who cures Russ by repeating one line
over and over again:
"Breaking Up wasn't your fault...Breaking Up wasn't your fault."
Free to live his life, he finds his girl and they live
happily ever after.
From Neicie:
- Gone With The Crowe:
Story about a young girl from Brooklyn who runs off to the
outback in search of love.
- A Streetcar Named Russell:
Story about a not so young girl from Brooklyn who likes to ride. (Rated "R")
- Brides of Crowe:
Story of a group of women who go to a convent to worship Russell Crowe
- Raging Russell:
The story of a GQ writer who learns how to de-lice cows.
- The Croweman Cometh:
Make up your own plot, the possibilities are endless. (Rated "NC17")
- There's Something About Russell:
Story of many obsessed fans who charter a plane to Iceland to see the object of their affection in a new film.
- It's A Wonderful Crowe:
Story of family members who scamper about at Christmas time searching for anything to do with RC for their loved ones.
- A Midsummer Night's Crowe:
Story of fans who, under a spell, mistake anyone with green eyes and a mole between them for RC, in malls, gyms etc... 'What fools we mortals be!'
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