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12/10/00
The depot wishes to extend get well wishes to Randy Castillo, who was recently diagnosed with Cancer.

For those of you who don't know Randy, he has played drums with both Motley Crue and Ozzy Osbourne. He was an integral part of quite a few noteable albums and has been one of my favorite drummers for years. Here's a few words from Randy about what he's been through as of late...
"Earlier this past June, before the Motley Maximum Rock tour was to begin, I was playin` a gig with my other band, Azul, at the CatClub when right in the middle of the show I started feelin` faint and nauseous. I barely made it through the show and afterward decided to take a cab home. On the way home I started getting a pain in my stomach that felt like I was being stabbed with an ice pick. I told the driver to take me to Cedars because luckily it was right on the way home. By the time we pulled up to the emergency entrance I could barely walk. I passed out right at the door and the next thing I knew I was in a wheel chair being pushed down a hallway. I asked what was goin on and the nurse told me to get ready 'cause I was headed for surgery. She said, "we have to put a tube up your penis and in your nose and up your butt!" So I said please put me under before you do that plllleeeease. She said "ok". I woke up the next afternoon with tubes and catheters and a morphine blanket on my brain. My surgeon came in and said, "we almost lost you kid, another 10 minutes and that shit would have gotten in your blood stream and you'd have been a goner"! I had someone watching over me that night. What happened was I had a duodenal ulcer which ate a hole through the lining of my stomach and once it opened up all that acid in the tummy just pours into your lower intestines and wreaks havoc. My doctor said my ulcer was caused by a bacteria that is contagious called "h-pylori". I thought it was my love of drink and good times that at least contributed, but no, it was a bug that apparently many people have and don't even realize that they do! I was one of them! Well that put an end to my summer tour with the Crue 'cause it was only two weeks before the tour was to begin. Bummer... so I sit out the summer recuperating and feeling sorry for myself. Thought that was bad? Well get a load of this. Around the beginning of last August I was shaving when I noticed a small painless lump under my right jaw line. I wrote it off figuring it was the beginning of a cyst or something. Wrong, a month later it was the size of a ping pong ball! I finally stopped my denial and went and had it checked out. It was "the big C" alright, Squamous Cell Carcinoma to be exact and it was mean and aggressive. There is nothing like the wave of emotion that hits you when you get told, "You have cancer". Nothing can prepare you for the doom you feel inside upon hearing those words. I went outside, walking around in a daze and asking why me, then took a deep breath, came back inside and said "well what do we do now?" I am probably ramblin` too much for you all but there is good reason which I'll explain later. On October 13th, yup, Friday and a full moon to boot, I had surgery to remove the tumor which by this time was the size of a lime. So much for joining the Crue in Japan and Australia. Bigger bummer 'cause I love Australia and Japan. So that brings me to now. I am currently getting radiation every day, five days a week and Chemo-Therapy once every three weeks for six months, cancer is a bitch. I ain't bald yet but they say some people don't lose hair, who knows, anyway I don t care, it grows back. So lately I've been gettin my creative ya-ya`s through my art. I have a bit of time on my hands lately so I've been painting my ass off. You can check it out at www.fcukingcontagious.net, click on "art". The reason I rambled is because I just want anybody out there to know that if you ever have the slightest inkling of a symptom, whether it be a lump or a sore anywhere on your body or anything that looks or feels suspicious, go get it checked out fast because with cancer time is of the essence. You could save yourself and all who care about you a shitload of grief by catching it early. Anyway I'm gonna be fine, I gotta do a mean dance with the devil but I'm gonna beat this thing and return more badass than ever! I promise."

BEST OF LUCK RANDY!!!!!

10/25/00

are the only new releases in recent memory that both satisfied and impressed me. I might be Metal, but I really suggest you pick these up. To be honest, I really expected Fozzy to be a joke. But WWF wrestler Chris Jericho can actually sing. I guess that's just another facet of his talent. Now I don't even need to say how I feel about Megadeth. I know I lot of you weren't too fond of Risk, but this CD has a lot of good old favorites and the 2 new songs "Kill the King" and "Dread & the Fugitive Mind" are definately a return to form. So, trust me. You owe it to yourself...

10/21/00
I really hate the idea of corporate professionalism defining your worth on a job. If work was more fun people would do it more. Besides, why should I listen to people who wear the same clothes regardless of season or condition. How intelligent is that? The suit is the most non versitile article of clothing possible. Anyway.. with that in mind...

Dial this number: 1-800-888-3999
Listen to all of the options . . . choose # 7.

(By the way... Thanks Mike.)

9/8/00
Thoughts on Ozzy Osbourne and once again me putting things in front of your face you might not notice. Did you know Ozzy paints?

Look kids, It's colorful! To be fair, I have no idea what it's supposed to mean. But hey, that's art.
Also, I've heard Ozzy shows referred to as "Black Masses"

This doesn't look like any Black Mass I've seen...Not that I have seen any. Nice view huh? Scenic?
We now return you to your regular, scheduled brain patterns...

8/21/2000
Recently I saw quite the interesting thing on mainstream TV. NBC Actually. Do you know this woman?

This is Jenna Jameson. Adult Film Actress.
I choose to call her an "Adult Film Actress" and not a "Porn Star" due to a recent interview on Later. Jenna was very down to earth, funny, and intelligent. She presented a wonderful picture of herself and came off as a true professional. Basically, she shattered every conception of the porn industry. Not to say that everyone is like her. But I have to hand it to her for having the guts to be herself and stick it up and other people's faces until they had to acknowledge it.

7/27/00
MET-UHL!!!!!!!

But seriously... these are three CD's I recently purchased from the bands of my youth. Bands that once were considered "BIG" and once were considered "COOL". I refuse to get into the mud-slinging involved for me not being a trendy clone and thinking for myself. I bring this up simply to inspire debate. I bought these CD's because I was curious and once I did they really got me thinking.
Here's what came to mind...
1) Each band has an original sound & style. The new Alice Cooper paints a pretty bleak picture of the world. The new Iron Maiden has an ambitous 9 minute song on it, where the new Motley Crue is filled with 3-5 minute sleazy rock songs such as "Punched in the teeth by love", that while lacking lyrically do have surprisingly catchy melodies. It interests me that these records were released in an area of cookie cutter formula music. No wonder they don't get any airplay.
2) In today's musical climate where is there room for a band who are named after a torture device and who have a zombie for a mascot? Where is there room for recovered drug addicts covered in tatoos? Where is there room for a 50 year old man with a woman's name singing about the decline of civilization? I propose that music today has become safe, sterilized & stylised. It's no longer about connecting with an artist as much as it is buying into a formula and a marketing campaign. It's about being a boy-band, or a teen-age diva, or a rap-rock bad boy or sensitive soft rock band. Are we that desperate to be acceptable that we sacrifice ourselves? Are we so brain washed that we automatically condemn & ridicule anything not first OK'ed by MTV and top 40 radio or whatever entity we get our instructions from?
3) What's important? Baring your soul? Being cool? Having catchy melodies? Having thought provoking lyrics? Being a follower? Being a leader? Just having fun? Can all exist at once? Do you have one at the cost of the other? What is the true role of the artist in our society? Or should we just leave that up to interpreations?

7/7/00
STRANGE CUSTOMS

- In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. (Like THAT makes sense.)

- In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

- Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers; the sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times. (A brick?)

- The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation. (Wonder which head?)

- There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time. Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry. (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

- In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired. (Ah! Justice!)

- Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores. (But of course!)

- In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act. (Makes one shudder at the thought.)

- In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time. (I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

- In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises." (Is this a great country or what? Not as great as Guam, however)

7/3/00
Differences Between You and Your Boss

When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.

When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.

When you make a mistake, you're an idiot.
When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human.

When doing something without being told, you're overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative.

When you take a stand, you're being bull-headed.
When your boss does it, he's being firm.

When you overlooked a rule of etiquette, you're being rude.
When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original.

When you please your boss, you're apple polishing.
When your boss pleases his boss, he's being co-operative.

When you're out of the office, you're wandering around.
When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.

When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick.
When your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.

When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.
When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked.

6/22/00
I have kept quiet long enough.The ECW World Heavyweight Champion once landed on my head.

Who's hardcore now? Yeah... That's what I thought!

5/22/00
It's tough to see your idols crumble...

Although it is great to see HBK back in the WWF it is all too evident that his best days are behind him. It's obvious by the way he moves that the back injury has taken it's toll and Shawn's not what he used to be. Wrestlers come and go from the spotlight and a career ending too soon due to an injury is all too common. But not a day goes by that I don't think that wrestling is forever a bit less entertaining without Shawn. I want to give my thanks to the greatest wrestler of my time for everything that he did and everything that he gave. For those of you who aren't familiar with the HBK legacy should definately track down some tapes. The depot wishes you happiness with Rebecca and Cameron and future success with the TWA. And it wouldn't hurt to see more HBK on WWF TV either.

5/19/00
WHO THE HELL STOLE MY GAS CAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

5/18/00
I don't exactly know why, but Sith Lords have been coming up a lot lately. I have determined I probably am closer to a Sith Lord than a Jedi Knight. I guess it's just my beautiful soul shining through.

3/1/00
I got this in my email the other day...

Good luck? Why does this thing look so pissed then?

2/28/00 (Give me a break, not a lot is going on... Anyway...)

Two words... MICK FOLEY!

I just wanted to take a moment to comment on career of one my idols as the wrestling chapter of it comes to a close (at least for now). I have been slowly making my way through Mick's book, "Have A Nice Day" whenever I get a chance since Christmas. I HIGHLY suggest this book to ANYONE, not just wrestling fans. The story of this man's life is nothing short of AMAZING! Very few people posess the talent, versatility and testicular fortitude of Mick Foley. I remember his initial performances as Mankind being quite chilling for me to watch at the time. I then watched him evolve his character into so many different areas that showcased his humor, charisma, & intensity, as well as many other facets of his personality. Mick would always find a way to entertain one way or the other. So many Mick Foley matches and promos mark among my favorite wrestling moments EVER. How many guys can pull off being 4 different people? However, I come to find that what I thought I knew about Mick was only the tip of the iceberg. In addition to being a great performer, Mick has overcome obstacles that would kill lesser men. If a man can achieve only a percentage of what Mick Foley has in his lifetime, he should consider himself truly fortunate. Thanks for the memories Mick! Enjoy your retirement! And don't be a stranger!

11/27/99
What happens when you meet your idols? Well, in a lot of instances you become a blithering idiot. Recently I was fortunate enough to get a double dose of

in the flesh. Sunday & Monday, Nov. 21st & 22nd. An In-Store and the show at the Avalon. And I can say that it profoundly effected me. There's more of the actual story on the stories page but I feel the need to share my thoughts here as well. Meeting one my top five bands ever was exciting to say the least. So much so that none of us could really think of anything to say. But we did watch. We took it all in. And the thing that impacted me the most was that they were in fact real people. By meeting them I now have a far better understanding of who they are and what they are trying to convey. I feel an ever deeper connection to their work. And the best part is I think I have a better idea how it came to be. So, I think as a whole, meeting your idols gets you in touch with what you connected with about them to begin with and aspires to take what you admire about them and use that to achieve your own personal goals. So, basically, Johnny's gonna go write some songs. See ya!

11/8/99
There have been a lot of changes in my life lately. And I know I am not alone in this. But anyway, basically what I am thinking now relates to happiness. For the longest time any one who knows me knows I was a pretty miserable person. But lately things have picked up. And the weird thing is that although I am happy to be happy, it feels really unusual to not be unhappy. I feel like a part of me is missing. I am making the transition well though. Becoming more "well-adjusted" or whatever. I definately think I will keep my edge and I will not become all about bunnies and sunshine, but I definately think that everyday life will be a bit more easy to take.

10/23/99

CHILDREN'S BOOKS YOU'LL NEVER SEE

1. You Are Different, And That's Bad
2. Dad's New Wife Timothy
3. Pop! Goes the Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games
4. Testing Homemade Parachutes Using Only Your Household Pets
5. Curious George and The High-Voltage Fence
6. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
7. Start a Real-Estate Empire With The Change From Your Mom's Purse
8. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
9. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
10. The Care Bears Maul Some Campers And Are Shot Dead
11. How To Become The Dominant Military Power In Your Elementary School
12. Controlling The Playground: Respect Through Fear
13. Strangers Have The Best Candy
14. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
15. Some Kittens Can Fly!
16. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her
17. The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer- Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!
18. All Dogs Go To Hell
19. The Kids' Guide To Hitchhiking
20. What Is That Dog Doing To That Other Dog?
21. Bi-Curious George
22. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry

10/20/99
...transmitting from a remote location...
Everytime I take a trip I always get hopeful for the day when I am in a touring band. But since apparently fate has made me a sotware geek I'll just say this. Planes always amaze me at the complete Chaos theory that is involved with anything to do with them. I have had luxury unparrelled, and also been stuffed in a box more suited to an amputee midget. Schedules, transfers, etc...what a mess. Hotels are cool. Hey you can be a slob and they pick up after you. Better than moms. No complaining. Plus going on a trip always separates what you really need to have with you from all the other stuff that clutters your house...I miss my guitars!

10/14/99
An unusual mix of happiness and sorrow fills my thoughts today. Firstly, today is the last day I will have to wear a suit due to my leaving my job to go to a place that doesn't suck. So it's back to the "normal" me. Whatever that is. I can't say I'll exactly be uncomfortable being back in jeans and t shirts and sneakers.
And now for the darkside. Today marks the anniversary of the death of one of the most important people to ever grace my life, my grandfather. So my thoughts are a bit elsewhere today. Those that mean the most are often taken way too soon. My world is forever darker without you around, Gramp. Anyone who knows me well knows the symbolism of my bracelets, especially today. As I get older I find myself thinking more and more about the life my grandfather endured and the support system he gave to me. Maybe in some way that is what keeps me going. His last, and perhaps greatest, gift. I know there's a lot of him in me. And I would like to think he'd be proud of what I have become, even for all my flaws. I guess all that is left to say is Thank You, I Love You, R.I.P. and I'll never forget you.

10/13/99
The things John thinks of when he has a cold... Who do you suppose first came up with the idea of blowing your nose? I mean sure, it helps, except for when you do it so much that your nose gets raw. But someone had to do it first. Oh well...back to the medicines and fluids. God knows rest is out of the question.

10/12/99
In keeping with our religous theme...my friend Mike sent me this:
Children's letters to God (and His Replies)

Dear God, Did you mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? Norma
Dear Norma, An accident. Just like you were. GOD

Dear God, Instead of letting people old die and having to make new ones,why don't you just keep the ones you have now? Jane
Dear Jane, Because they smell bad. GOD

Dear God, Who draws the lines around the countries? Nan
Dear Nan, I do, stupid! GOD

Dear God, I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay? Neil
Dear Neil, Were they men? Because that's not good. GOD

Dear God, It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about you that people are not supposed to say, but I hope you will not hurt him anyway. Your friend (but I am not going to tell you who I am)
Dear Jack, I know who you are. I won't hurt him though. That would be too easy. Usually, what I like to do is hurt the people he cares most about.Like you. GOD

Dear God, Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up. Steve S.
Dear Steve, It says here you're a little punk. You get what you wish for. GOD

Dear God, If we come back as something, please don't let me be Jennifer Horton, because I hate her. Jordana
Dear Jordana, Is it because she's prettier than you are? GOD

Dear God, I want to be just like my daddy when I get big, but not with so much hair all over. Sam
Dear Sam, Many of my disciples were hairy. In fact,Joseph wore a sweater. Noah had a big giant, fluffy beard. In the old days, hair was good. Don't be so judgmental or I'll send you to Hell. GOD

Dear God, I bet it is very hard for you to love all the people in the world. There are only four people in our family and I can never do it. Nan
Dear Nan, Who told you I love everybody? I only like Newt Gingrich. GOD

Dear God, Of all the people who worked for you, I like Noah and David the best. Rob
Dear Rob, Noah was an alcoholic. David was an egotist. I like Newt. GOD

Dear God, My brother told me about being born, but it doesn't sound right. They are just kidding, aren't they? Marsha
Dear Marsha, You mean the part when your father got your mother drunk and took her back to his house and put on some Barry White and then did the nasty? Yeah, that's right. GOD

Dear God, We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school, we learned that you did it. So I bet he stole your idea. Sincerely, Donna
Dear Donna, I created the sun which gives you light. Tommy invented the light bulb. He thought the light I created wasn't enough. He's in Hell. GOD

10/6/99
Anyone who knows me knows I LOVE WRESTLING!I love it for all that it is. I guess I'm a "smart mark". Now shut up because I don't want to hear your shit comments. A lot of ignorant people forget the actual human beings behind sports entertainment. So I have 3 comments. Firstly, the match recently between Chris Benoit & Bret Hart was not only a tremendous match, but also something Owen would have been very proud of. If you don't get this then you're probably too dense to have it explained so just forget it.

Second, I personally want to send my respects to the family of Gorilla Monsoon.

Before the days of DX or NWO or stupid hangers on to wrestling because it was "cool" Gorilla was one of the most entertaining faces in the wrestling world. I am truly saddened at his loss and I am upset that so many will not realise what he really means to pro wrestling. To paraphrase one of Brendan's best lyrics, Gorilla, if there's a heaven I know you're there. And last but not least, Droz.

I hope he makes a full and speedy recovery. He was young and just starting out but he has the potential. Everyone knows it's important to push the youth in the wrestling biz. I don't want to hear about how wrestling is bad because of this incident. These are grown men who made their choices. How come no one wants to regulate more "acceptable" athletic endevours? Athletes get hurt all the time. It's a risk taken for something they love to do. Understand that. So, anyway, if I believed in the prayer, I'd pray for Droz. But every prayer I ever prayed blew up in my face so that's a no go. You know what I hope happens.

10/1/99
Let's see...going to see bands and talking to people about starting bands and all of the usual has got me on a tip that is all too familar. What is the deal with all these people placing all these rules on music and what deserves to be acknowledged? I am sick of bands being judged by how cute they are, or how angry or hardcore, or the clothes they wear, or how old they are or whatever other reason. Only two things should matter...
1) Do they have something to say?
2) Can they do a good job making it real and believeable?
That's it. Everything else confuses me. Why is it that in order to like or identify with something you have to present this whole stupid image? Why can't "angry" rockers be something other than angry? Do you think the Backstreet Boys would be as big without predictable looks and "hype gear"? Do these Ricky Martin fans know what "Livin' la vida loca" actually means? Why is it that one band can be great because they sound like so and so, but the next is bad because they do the exact same thing? I listen to a bunch of stuff and it all comes out in my music. Music is about feelings. I listen to music that I feel I identify with and I play music according to what I feel. I also take great pride in being a multi-dimensional person. Therefore there are a lot of different sides, a lot of different moods and a lot of different music. I think it's cool. I guess I'm wrong. The right thing is to buy into whatever is the fad of the moment. Rememeber kiddies, it doesn't pay to be open minded or original or have an realistice viewpoint of the world. You get beat with the conformity stick!
That was sarcasm by the way!