· Borrow some hair. When your roommate's sleeping, sprinkle it around their head. Watch them when they wake up in the morning , making cutting noises with your scissors. ( "Snip,. Snip…")
· Draw a small dot inside your armpit. Draw the dot bigger everyday and tell your roommate excitedly, "It's getting bigger! It's getting bigger!"
· Buy a few kitchen knives. Sharpen them every night, looking at your roommate and muttering, "It's not too long now. Not too long."
· Buy a few hundred pens or pencils and spread them out in one corner of the room. Place one single pen on the other side and start laughing, pointing at it.
· Get a few potatoes. Draw faces on them and name them. Name one as your roommate and separate it from the others. After a few days, cook it and eat it, then tell him, "It was no place for you."
· Have a vacuum cleaner in the room. Watch it for a few days with a scared expression. When your roommate's there, open the door a bit and whisper, "Shh! Is he gone?"
· Throw darts on a blank wall. After two hours, scream "YES! BULL'S EYE!"
· Steal your roommate's most precious thing. When they ask you where it is, say you swapped it for magic beans and hand them some beans.
· Pretend you're on the phone when your roommate walk in. Scream and swear and go ballistic. Hang up, then tell him, "It's your mom. She said she'll call back."
· Pack everything and live in the corridor for one month. Then come back inside and tell your roommate, "Your turn."
· Lock the door when your roommate go out, and when they try to come in, yell "Don't come in! I'm naked!". Repeat this several times. When you finally let him in, walk around nude as if nothing happened.
· Play Shadow-Boxing every morning. One day, come in with a sad face and tell him that your shadow got hurt. Ask if you can play with his shadow.
· Buy a pot plant. Sleep with it and talk to it as well. A month later, yell at it, "I can't live with you anymore!" then slam the door and leave. Throw the plant away and act as if you don't want to talk about it.
· Order McDonalds Lunch special. Eat the napkins and the straws and chuck the rest out. Repeat this for a week.
· Stick a pair of shoes on the ceiling. When your roommate comes back, roll around the floor groaning, "Aw…I fell off the ceiling…"
· Place a poisonous spider in a bottle. Leave it in the room for three days, then let it go. Leave the empty bottle in the room. When your roommate asks you where the spider is, answer vaguely, "…I dunno…should be around here somewhere…"
· Say to your roommate, "I have to tell you something very important." Then pretend to faint. Wake up and tell him you can't remember what it was. The next morning, yell "I got it!" Then faint again. Repeat this every week.
· (And finally…) Send a bunch of flowers to your roommate, with a card that says " I'm sorry…It won't happen again…" When the roommate gets the flowers and cards, they'll start ripping up the flowers. Repeat this several times.
...Now, whether you want to try this is entirely up to you…I hold no responsibility if there's a sudden dramatic increase of in-patients at Local Psychiatric centers… If you tried it up to the 5th point, you're well on your way.
