As with every controversial debate that divides Christians, we must all put our emotions aside, and go straight to God's Word (the Bible) for answers if we are ever going to get things settled.
The apostle Paul stated, "I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent" (1 Tim. 2:12 NIV). Does that mean that God would forbid a woman to teach a co-ed Sunday School class or Bible Study today (because she would be teaching men as well as women)? I hardly think so. Today, unlike Paul's time, most Sunday School teachers and Bible Study leaders serve under the authority of higher-ranking church leaders, who are usually men. Secondly, I believe that Paul was precisely forbidding women to serve as elders, bishops, overseers, or pastors (synonymous terms for the highest-ranking officers in the local church). After he finished explaining why he forbade a woman to teach or to mentor a man in 1 Timothy, Chapter 2, he immediately began to lay out the qualifications for church officers in Chapter 3. That tells me that when Paul used the terms "teach" and "authority" in 1 Tim. 2:12, he was referring to the work and position of an elder/bishop or overseer/pastor. I believe 1 Tim. 5:17 confirms this. That is why I do not believe God objects to women who teach co-ed Sunday School classes or Bible Studies, so long as they submit to the authority of those officers of their local church (which should be men). This would also apply to women who want to preach as itinerant evangelists or overseas missionaries.
My more-conservative brothers often whip out 1 Corinthians 14:33-35 where Paul ordered women to be silent in church, and even called it "disgraceful" for women to speak in church. They argue from this passage that women should not be allowed to speak in church at all, especially from behind the pulpit. That is not what Paul implied. In v. 35a, Paul ordered, "If they [women in the church] want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at home." According to the context of this passage, Paul was objecting to women who habitually disrupted the worship. They were known to cause disorder with the many questions they would ask their husbands during the worship.
How does God feel about women deacons? Deacons also serve under the authority of the elders, bishops, overseers, or pastors, but I would still argue that God does not call women to be officially ordained deacons. The qualifications for deacons are the same as those for elders, bishops, overseers, or pastors (1 Tim. 3:1-12). The only difference is rank of authority. God may call women to serve in similar ways as deacons, but that does not make them deacons per-se. Some churches have designated "deaconesses"--women who assist (male) deacons when special needs arise. They are usually deacons' wives.
If this sounds "male chauvinistic" to you, then you need to understand that a church officer (elder, overseer, deacon, etc.) is higher only in rank of authority and responsibility--not in value or in essence. If you were to ask the President of the United States, "Do you think you're better than me, just because you're the President?" I'm certain he would answer, "No, of course not!"
I do not intend to offend, but neither do I make any apologies for studying God's Word and drawing unpopular conclusions. As controversial as this issue may be, I still try not to divide over it because I consider it a peripheral Christian debate.
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