We got owners, favorite drivers,
Boy, that Tony Stewart's a whiner.
And we got rookies, advertisers,
Like uhhh let's say: Havoline, Target, Sharpie,
Caterpillar, Nextel,
Mountain Dew, Dupont, Lowe's, Home Depot, Kodak,
M&Ms, UBF, Tide, Alltel, Gillette, Kelloggs,
Viagra, Dewalt, and uhhh Budweiser.
But the trophy girls still have my favorite parts.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

We got cautions, we got pitstops,
You can't hear a dang thing once the flag drops.
And poor Cow Patty, and swervin' Marlin, ha ha,
Are gonna find it tough to beat Mark Martin.
'Cause that Viagra car is always driven hard.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

I love NASCAR, it's my kind of race.
Just watchin' Jeff Gordon fly up a wall,
Puts a smile on Dale junior's face.
No caviar. It's it's beer and Mopar.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

I like short tracks, you'll see more wrecks,
And about a million screamin' rednecks.
And ol' Jeff Burton, ha, an' poor Mike Skinner,
Well, they've done forgot what it's like to be a winner.
And Ken Schrader still ain't sure who his sponsors are.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

"Hey, that was a close one up there fellas.
"But I got into one end.
"I might pull over right up here next pitstop,
"I want you to get two front tires.
"I need a wedge on the left side to keep this
windshield playin' on the gas.
"An' you don't care, hand me a pair of underwear,
I have messed all in my drawers."

I like football. (I like football.)
I like my wrestlin'.
I like a good game of air hockey,
I like some pinball now and then.
How about you, Toby?

I love NASCAR, it's my kind of race.
Just to see Big E back on the track,
Would put a smile on every face.
No-one drove a car quite like Earnhardt.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

Vroom, vroom, vroom: Gentlemen, start your engines:
I love NASCAR.