Clive's Halloween Schemes

Yes. It's "All Hallows Eve"... eve, on this day.

You might remember (or then again, you might not.. i'm going to recap anyway, so it matters not) that some time ago, I mentioned Clive's plan to create giant pumpkins in time for Halloween, with the help of that alcoholic beverage that some call "voddie".

The scheme didn't go entirely to plan; Clive and his associates have watered the ground with vodka every day for weeks, now, but observed no change in the size of the pumpkins. (However, there are a fair few inebriated insects who crawl / buzz / dance around those parts, now.. and a fearless hedgehog who would sit in the middle of the road on a regular basis, swearing at cars and daring them to flatten him... "Whadju call me? I cud 'ave yoo.. c'mon ya bustarrrds...")
Clive was disappointed at the apparant lack of growth. He tried everything to make those 'kins grow; or rather, he persuaded his friends to try everything...

• The Anteaters were hired to sit with torches pointing at the pumpkins during sunless hours.
  (A waste of their talents, in their opinion; but Clive was paying them over the odds, so they decided not to quibble... the alcoholic ants they ate were a nice bonus, also...)
• Asphalt the Octopus was persuaded to perform a drunken dance around the pumpkin patch. For three hours.
  (He couldn't stand up any longer; it's thanks to the magical gift of extra limbs bestowed upon all octopeds that he lasted that long...)
• Rodney, Clive's squiddly friend, decided it would be a good idea to inject a couple of pumpkins with alcohol also, and see what happened.
  (Nothing happened, but Rodney inadvertantly injected his left tenticle with alcohol; well, needles are never easy to handle, especially when you have tenticles... and you're a little tipsy... Rodders, oddly enough [or not, if you consider his average daily alcohol consumption] was not adversely affected.)

And so, the day before Halloween is upon us, and Clive is a little disappointed. Apparantly he had planned to sell the large pumpkins at an inflated price, claiming they were magic pumpkins. However I noticed he has nabbed a couple of the pumpkins from Norm's allotment anyway; perhaps he plans to hollow out the pumpkin, dig out the seeds, and sell them as magic beans? (Clive has found that people will buy anything, with the right "persuasion"...)

He always has a backup plan, though. And this Halloween, Clive plans to do what he did the previous Halloween... extreme trick or treating.
Clive reckons he doesn't need a costume; he deserves to be given money anyway. He's a giant squid. And if the people he accosts don't agree with his argument, then he'll, uh, "trick" them real good.

Trick or Treating was really invented for people like Clive, after all; "Look, i'm dressed up like a witch. Give me sweets, or I throw eggs at your house and put fireworks through your letterbox..."
(Clive takes this a little bit further, but the principle's the same...)

It may not involve giant pumpelkins or alcohol (well, not directly) but Clive's Halloween night will involve two of the things he likes best; taking money from the gullible, weak, and money laden, and scaring them into the bargain. And for once, he's permitted to do it.

(Happy Halloween...)

Yes, it was seasonal at the time, it will be again. Things like this are.. kinda like a stopped clock...

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