I realized aloud in the midst of saying it that even when
we die we probably don't find out the answer as to why we were ever
alive. Even the avowed atheist probably thinks that in death he'll get
some answer. I mean God will be there, or there won't be anything at
all.
"But that's just it," I said, "we don't make any discovery at that
moment! We merely stop! We pass into nonexistance without ever knowing
a thing." I saw the universe, a vision of the sun, the planets, the
stars, black night going on forever. And I began to laugh.
"Do you realize that! We'll never know why the hell any of it happened,
not even when it's over! We're going to die and not even know... and
all this meaninglessness will just go on... We'll just be gone, dead,
dead, dead, without ever knowing!"
But I had stopped laughing. I stood still and I understood perfectly
what I was saying!
There was no judgement day, no final explanation, no luminous moment
in which all terrible wrongs would be made right, all horrors redeemed...
No one was ever going to tell us anything!"
from The Vampire Lestat by Anne Rice
