Today sucked, it sucked, it sucked. Today let alone gave me a good enough excuse to want to die. To make a long story short we went to the doctor's and I basically got told that I'm fat. Great, huh? Yeah, I thought so too. Look at me. I'm fucking talking to myself now. It doesn't matter though. I'm sick and tired of being who I am. I wish I could be perfect. I wish I could be normal. I'm tired of being myself. I feel like if I don't do something about the way I am, I'm going to lose Adam. I don't want to lose him. He means more to me than anything else in this whole fucked up world. I'd never be the same without him, and that's the truth. I feel like I could just lay down and die without him. I don't know what I'd do if I lost him. I know, I'm perfectly shallow. But I don't give a fucking damn.
"There's no need to argue anymore. I gave all I could but it left me so sore. And the thing that makes me mad is the one thing that I had. I knew, I knew I'd lose you. You'll always be special to me, special to me, to me. Will I forget in time? You said I was on your mind. There's no need to argue, there's no need to argue anymore." -The Cranberries.