THE WOMAN AND THE WITCH: DRUANTIA'S STORY
My family is of strict Christian/Catholic origins. Growing up, the only words that were synomous with Witch, was either Halloween ( now Samhain to me ) or sadly enough the Devil. Still, today my family can not get the past prejudice of the so called wickedness within the word Witch. That's okay though, because it's their opinion. And while I may not be completely out of the ' Broom/Besom Closet ' where my family is concerned, I am still very proud and honored to be a Witch.
To me, religion should make you closer to the Deity/ies of your choice, closer to your family and with those you cherish around you. Religion should empower you to do and be your very best, and give you comfort and hope when you need it most. And with Wicca that's exactly what I get.
You see, just like any other religion Wicca will not excuse you from the ups and downs of Life. It does in my opinion, make one much more compassionate, understanding, wiser, and more aware of the Higher Powers above and around us. But,it will not however, save us from all of the strife of every discomforting situation we obtain in this Life.
And early on, this point was very clear to me. As a child and throughout my teens my religious life was a dreaded ordeal. I was constantly dragged to church every Sunday to find faith in God. A Deity that I felt most of time, forced to love and worship because my parents told me to. But my problems weren't with God, Jesus Christ, the Church, or even the Bible itself.
My problems with Christianity and Catholicism in my opinion, were with the issues of Sin and their views on Death. As both a Christian and a Catholic I quickly developed this neurotic fear of Death. I felt guilty all the time, I had nightmares about Death that I never spoke of, and I was literally too afraid to do anything, especially with my friends without worrying whether or not I was commiting a Sin. I was so miserable and lonely then. So much so that I ended up hating myself, and often turned to drugs and self-mutilation to cope with my pain.
Finally when I turned sixteen, I had enough. After years of hidden suffering and feeling no real connection to God by the views of Christianity and Catholicism, I decided to study to Wicca. Now, I know what some of you are thinking. Why Wicca right? Well, there a few reasons. One of them being the fact that I wanted to be closer to my family. And so I began to study my roots. And once finding out that I was mainly of Greek/Irish decent, I felt it was only natural to return to the religion of my ancestors. And strangely enough my ancestors on both sides of my family tree shared one common religion before they were introduced to Christianity and Catholicism. And that religion was Wicca.
I also wanted to feel whole again as a person. To be, in a sense, spiritually connected to a Higher Power that could reconnect my past, present, and future with the guidance and love of my ancestors.
And ever since I was very young I just knew that there was a special energy that defined each of us individually that the religions of Christianity and Catholicism just could not explain to me. And so in the quest to find religious happiness, my thirst for knowledge began.
Over the next four years I spent my days at the library researching. Constantly cramming, reviewing, and quizzing myself with all that I could find and learn about Wicca. I often had to photocopy my newly found precious research or write until my fingers went numb because I knew I couldn't take any of the books home because of my parents and their prejudice against Wicca.
I also spent many nights locked in my bedroom reading my friends' books on Wicca and sometimes when the opportunities were offered and the timing was well planned so my parents wouldn't know, I would join my friends with their Covens at their Covenstead for meetings. I also spent many sleepless nights re-arranging my bedroom furniture and hiding my beloved altar and supplies all over my room, either by stuffing my research notes under my mattress and hiding my sacred book of shadows, wicca books, tarot cards, and stones in my suitcase in the closet.
This was really tough and aggrevating to do at first, but as I learned and became more self-confident in myself and my magick after a while, my life suddenly started changing for the better, and at the age of twenty, I initiated myself a Witch, I do however, admit now that I did give into religious discrimination and for a while I almost let it destory me. But it is this very reason too, the reason of religious discrimination, why I feel it is vital for me to come out of the Shadows a little and stand up for me, and for the Witches of the Past, Present, and Future.
For me, becoming a Witch, gave me the personal freedom to be Me. I am no longer trapped by the chains of Sins and Death anymore. But even though Wicca has worked for me, I am not saying that Wicca is right for you, for Wicca is not for everyone. It is a very strict religion. And it does not work for those people simply looking for a shortcut through life. And just like Christianity and Catholicism, Wicca can take years to work, with countless hours of time, and true effort. It will too, often at times cause you to make many sacrifices, for Wicca is a true labor of spiritual love and commitment. But if your heart is true, then I believe that Magick will happen for you.
And for those of you who are wondering, I did not choose Wicca to rebel against my family or to hurt them in any way. I love my family with all my heart. But I know it is only our religious beliefs that are very different, and I have accepted this fact. But please do keep in mind that changing your religion from your family's is not an act of cruelty or teen angst/rebellion because for me, a person has to choose a system of faith that is right and just for them and that makes them as a person, both joyous in their heart as well as spiritually and/or religiously satisfied with thier beliefs.
And just who am I to be telling you all this? I am Druantia Ione. I am a Sagittarius. I am twenty-two years old. I love to help people and make them feel better about themselves. I love writing and poetry. I love to learn about different people, other cultures, and faraway lands. I adore Brad Pitt and Jude Law. I love listening to artists like Limp Bizkit, Everclear, and Metallica. I love surfing the net and chatting online with friends. I go to work, I take college classes, I do yoga and dance excercise. I love watching Malcolm In the Middle and MTV. I love to go clubbing, watching movies, and spending time with my boyfriend. And I am here to say that I am not a Freak, and I am not the Devil's Advocate. I am simply a Woman and a Witch. And I am no different from you or anyone else.
Many Blessings to All,
*Druantia*