Father

Kazuya Mishima…

A total enigma.

The man I knew for only a few unpleasant years as my father. The man that has broken hearts and abandoned me. Growing up I watched each day my mother struggle, smiling like everything was perfectly fine. Little did she know, I sensed something wrong. I sensed the absence of my father not being my mum’s fault, or even my fault.

But of his own doing, his choice. Was I not good enough for him? Did my mother not sacrifice enough for him? Isn’t sacrificing a heart enough That bastard, my blood boils just thinking about it.

I step back from the headstone that laid my father’s remains beneath. I’ve decided I’ll never be the man he was. I’ll be there for the mother of my child, I’ll take care of her and my child. I’ll wake up each day and be grateful to have both and every night before I sleep I pray I never lose them.

I clench my right fist, hoping to crush the pain I have into ashes. I hope the ashes could blow away. Sadly, I know that’s not going to happen. The pain is always gonna be there.

I feel a small hand grasp my left hand, then I feel two arms wrap around me. She stands on her tip-toes, kissing me. I’m now embracing the love of my life, someone I’d never abandon.

Xiaoyu.

Married three years, one daughter, and were still going strong. Two minutes I feel a slight weight on my leg, I look down to see miniature eyes of my wife in a small face.

Hikari.

I raise down to pick my baby daughter up.

“You know this is the best father’s day ever.”

Xiaoyu smiles her trademark smile. "Why?”

“I’ve got the best gifts ever-the two most important women in my life now.” My mother is important too-I'll always cherish in my heart. SHe'll never be forgotten

“Oh Jin” My love kisses me on the cheek. Hikari got abit jealous and blows a raspberry on my cheek. We all smile, Hikari opens her mouth and screeches like a bird . “Da-da!”

Xiao squeals, “Jin! She’s talking!”

Hikari continues ,"Da-da!” My heart fills with joy and the anger I once felt melts away. I know deep inside,

I’ll never be the man my father was.

Later that night after returning home from the cemetary, I tuck my baby into her crib. Watching her sleep away without a trouble in the world. I wonder what she's dreaming about? What do kids dream about? Happy things I hope, things that only they could imagine-pain-free, full of color, full of light adventures.

Inside I sadden because one day I know when Hikari grows up I won't be there to protect her. And one day she'll be tempted by darkness and she'll get hurt. So from now on I'll never leave her or her mother, because she needs a father. And Xiao needs me to protect our family. She needs me to be there-to be here.

I turn off the light in Hikari's room and walk to me and Xiao's room. Xiao is on her side of the bed,fast away asleep. I slide in bed ,wrappig my arms around her. I make Xiao the last thing I see before I sleep. "Jin..."

I open one eye,listening to Xiao whisper. " I know you were thinking about you father..."

I sigh, rolling over."Xiao, look can't we talk about it in the morning?"

I sigh, rolling over."Xiao, look can't we talk about it in the morning?"

"No! Everytime I bring this up...you shut me out! Jin I'm you're wife now you need to tell me stuff." Xiao persisted. I love this about her.

I've always wanted someone to open me up and I've only opened up to few-most gave up. But Xiao consisted,slipping and sliding always looking for an answer.

"Now I know you were thinking about your father...and what he's done...but that's over now. He's gone now...it's time to move on..." Xiao's words rang through my ears. "Please! For Hikari's sake,for our sake!"

I hold her closer and never want to let go. Xiao doesn't know how much she means to me. The past is the past, and it doesn't mean I'll ever have to be like Kazuya.

His wrong doings show me how to be the father he never was. Today I'll start to be a father.