Sarah sat in the lobby, chewing on her botton lip. Her legs twitched nervously has she waited for Daniel. She was so scared about what might happen in the next hour or so. What would they discover? Too many things began to fill her mind. Everything that was happening. The dream, the visions. Her true feelings for Daniel. Her life seemed simple before he came into it. But she couldn't figure out if this was a good thing, or a bad thing. She heard laughing and looked up to see Daniel, Ben, and Chris emerging from the restaurant.
She stood up to greet them, "Hey, guys."
Ben turned to her, "Hey, Sarah," he gave her a quick hug, "What's up?"
"Umm, I came to see Daniel actually," she looked over at Daniel with a certain glare.
"Oh, I see," he nudged Chris and winked at him.
"Guys!" Daniel snapped. Sarah looked at him confused and he just shook his head slightly.
Chris giggled, "That's cool. Ben and I were planning on going back to sixth street. Tony invited us. You guys want to go?"
Daniel went and stood by Sarah, "Actually, I was kind of hoping you and I could go see a movie or something."
Sarah nodded, "Yeah, that sounds good. Maybe we can just catch you guys later, you know after we get out."
"Okay, umm, I don't know exactly where we'll be. Most likely the Ivory Cat, right?" asked Ben.
"Most likely. But, I know James and Tony like Lucy's Retired Surfers Bar, so you might be there. Don't worry, we'll find you if we decide to go," she nodded to Daniel who agreed with her.
"Okay, then. We'll see you guys later."
"Hey remember guys, we have a gig tomorrow night so don't drink too much," Daniel stated.
"Yes, Mommy," Ben bowed and him and Chris walked off laughing.
Daniel and Sarah stood in silence until the boys had left. He looked at her, slowly slid a reassuring arm around her waist and held her tightly, "You okay?"
Sarah looked up at him somewhat startled, "Yeah, why?"
"Nothing, it's just that you've been tapping your foot there for awhile now and I'm worried that you're gonna punch a hole threw soon."
Sarah looked down at the foot and noticed the rapid tapping. She quickly stopped, "Sorry. Just a little nervous."
"Me too," he carefully placed an arm around her waist, "Come on let's get this over with."
Sarah parked her car across the street from the shop that Daniel told her to go to. "I don't think this place is still opened Daniel. It's way after seven and most shops close at six on Sundays."
Daniel looked at the shop and noticed the floor above it had a lighted window. "It doesn't matter. She's still here. I'm sure of it."
Sarah looked at the shop and bit her lip. She turned forward and noticed the people heading into 6th street. It wasn't to late to turn back. She felt Daniel place his hand on her's. She looked at him and found that his eyes where asking her if she wanted to still do this. She wanted to say no, but she knew they had to do this. She sighed deeply and turned the car off.
Quitely, they both exited the car. Sarah waited for Daniel and they walked across the street together. The noise from the clubs were almost aggrevating to Daniel. He wished he could just tell everyone to shut up for awhile so that he could think. They came to the front of the store and stood there for a moment. Daniel reached for the handle and pulled but the door was locked.
"See, I told you," Sarah whispered.
Daniel tried knocking on the door and waited again. Nothing. He put his hands to the window and peered inside. He could see a flight of stairs in the back of the store and what looked like a back door to the building. He stood back and looked from side to side. He noticed a gate on the side of the building that led to a small alley. "Come on. Let's try over here."
"Daniel, wait," Sarah stopped him, "I don't know about this anymore. Maybe we should go."
"I thought you wanted to find out what was going on?"
"I do but...I'm scared about what we might find out. I don't know, I'm just not sure if I'm ready?"
"Do you want to wait until you're ready before we do this? And have all those questions burning in your mind?"
"I...no...I don't know."
Daniel placed his hand on her cheek, "Sarah, remember I told you that I once had a "strange dream" myself?" She nodded slowly. "Well, it was almost like your dream. It seemed real, like a memory. And there was a girl in the dream that had the same green eyes just like the woman. Earlier that day, I came to this shop for the first time, and there was a statue inside, that caused me to have a vision just like we had earlier. And that girl was in the vision and so was the statue. The girl called me William and brother." Sarah stared intently at Daniel. Her eyes were filled with fear and something that resembled quilt. Daniel continued, "I know you're scared. I am too, but I want to know what's going on. You don't have to come with me if you don't want to, but I'm going to find out what all of this means."
Sarah looked back at all the people walking into 6th street. How come none of them are going through this? Why us? She thought. She turned back to Daniel, "Lead the way."
He smiled a little and took her hand. They walked over to the gate. Daniel looked it over and then carefully pushed on it. It opened with a loud sweak. Both of them flinched a little, before continuing into the dark alley. It was filled with weeds and dead or dying flowers. Sarah tried to repress her laugh at the cliched scene. This woman was definitly trying to keep an image. They made their way to the back of the building and saw the back door.
"How much you want to bet that that's locked to," Sarah asked.
Daniel gave her a slight smiled and walked up to the door. He knocked on it and Sarah tighted her grip on his hand. No answer. Daniel bit his lip and carefully turned the doorknob. It was unlocked.
"Daniel," Sarah whispered as he opened the door, "What are you doing?"
"Shhh."
They slowly walked in and let the door close behind them. "Oh, wow!" Sarah said as she over looked the shop.
"Hello?" Daniel called out, "Is anyone here?" No answer.
Sarah stood silent waiting for an answer, "Guess not," she finally said as she continued looking at all the items on the tables.
"Hello, Daniel. Sarah. I'm so glad you decided to come."
Both Daniel and Sarah jumped when the heard the dramatic voice of the woman standing at the top of the staircase. She wore a long, silky, dark green dress, that made her red hair seem brighter than it really was. Her green eyes were even more startling than before as the moonlight was now bursting through the windows.
Neither one of them knew what to say to the woman. All they could do was stand there and stare at her. The woman smiled and desended down the stairs, "Perhaps it would be better if I started the conversation. I don't believe I've ever properly introduced myself. My name is Lydia," she held out her hand to Daniel. He only continued to glare at her. "I guess you have too many questions in your minds to be worring about introductions."
"Who are you?" Sarah finally spoke.
"Someone you've known before," Lydia glided over to her, "Someone who has been there for you and cared for you when no one else could. But I'm sure you don't remember."
Sarah cocked her head to the woman, "What are you talking about?"
"Yes, what are you talking about?" Daniel stepped in, "What has been going on with us?"
"Things that you'll get used to in time. I promise."
"Cut the bullshit!" Daniel snapped back, "What's going on and what are these visions that Sarah and I have? What do they mean?"
Lydia turned and headed for the staircase, "If you please, follow me. I will tell you everything you need to know and everything that I am able to tell you."
Sarah looked at Daniel, waiting to see what he would do. He met her gaze and shrugged his shoulders slightly before nodding to her. Sarah swallowed heavily and carefully followed Lydia up the stairs.
The small loft was dimly litted with candels on a few scattered, small wooden tables, and a short lamp on the window sill. The walls held several paintings each. Some new but strange, others very old. Probably the paintings too fragile to be on display in the store. Some of the paintings were colorful, vast landscapes. Others were of small children smiling and laughing, possibily about a secret that was so terrific it gave that surge of power that only youth can feel.
A large portrait stood alone in the far corner on the left. It was a young woman sitting comfortably in a grand chair. She wore a golden dress that seemed to fit perfectly as if it was her favorite. The patterns of leafs and crests were woven into the fabric carefully and percisely. Her hair, flowing freely and softly down her shoulders, was almost as golden as her gown. Her eyes gleamed bright, fierce, blue. They showed a powerful woman that wished to show no fear that might be locked deep inside her soul.
Sarah walked over to the spectaular painting and studied it. "Who is this?" she asked, not quite aware that the question had poured from her mouth.
Lydia turned and looked at the portrait, "Oh, that. Well, that happens to be a portrait of Queen Elizabeth I. Sometime after her coronation but before she decided that the new principals would go into affect."
Daniel joined Sarah, "This is really Queen Elizabeth? But she's so young."
"Yes, well she was young when they crowned her queen, but few know of those times before her dramatic change."
"How did you come into possesion of such a thing?" Sarah questioned.
Lydia made her way to the small kitchen, "It belonged to an old friend of mine. She kept it in her room, where the queen felt it was safier. She loved that painting dearly, but her mother repulsed it. Thought is was too much a reminder of the darker times. So she was ordered to give back to the queen immeditly. But instead she gave it to me to hold until she could later come for it."
"By the queen, do you mean the Queen Mother or do you mean Elizabeth II?" Daniel asked, "The present day queen?"
"Neither. I mean Elizabeth I."
Both Daniel and Sarah spun around to face the smiling woman, "What?"
"Please, children," Lydia placed a tray on the coffee table, "Don't tell me these things still surprise you?" She looked into the stunned faces of the young couple and sighed, "I guess so. Alright. Sit down and I will explain."
They both sat on the small, plush couch across from Lydia who sat in a large comforter. They seemed to hold their breathes as they waited for her to begin.
Lydia took a deep breath and started, "Are you familiar with the term "old soul"?"
Sarah licked her lips, "I've heard it. My English teacher called me one, once."
"Daniel?" Lydia turned to him. He shook his head a little. She nodded, "Many scholars have metaphored an old soul to be like that of a candle's flame." She stooped down and blew out two of the three candles on the table. She picked the third up, "The candle may be different," she relit the other two, "But it is still the same flame." She looked up at Daniel and Sarah to see if they were still following along. She put the candle down and continued, "Now, many who use the term, think of it as only that. A term. A mere definition of a young person who seems older than their actual age. But those who believe know better. An "old soul" is just what it says it is. A soul that is older that most people it knows. A soul that has lived hundreds or even thousands of years. Passed on body to body, life to life.
"Some call it reincarnation but it's more complicated than that. More meaningful. Some souls can go through life once, just once. Others must go through it many more times. It seems almost cruel, I know, but it is for their own good if they wish to go to "The Light". I can honestly tell you that there is no real so-called "Hell". There is, however, a place called the "The Dark Side". You see, when we die, we travel to "The Other Side" and once there, you have two choices. You can either go through the right door, which is the Light, the place where God and the other white souls will embrace you. Or, you can choose the left door, which is the Dark Side. There, Lucifer watches over you."
"And this "Dark Side" is where all the sinners go? With the devil?" Sarah asked.
Lydia shook her head, "No, no. I said Lucifer. Not "the devil". Like I said the is no Hell, therefore, there is no red, pitched forked tailed guy named the devil or Satan. Remember, Lucifer was an angel, still is actually. God just gave him the duty of watching over the "dark souls". God will not leave His children on their own. Remember that. The reason God allows us to think that there is a Hell and the devil and that everyone who sins goes there to be tortured for eternity is to basically keep everyone on their best behavior. If everyone knew what really happens to sinners, then trust me we would live in a real shitty place. Everyone would be commiting crimes or abusing and killing people."
Daniel seemed a lot more interested now, "So what really happens to sinners?"
"Well, not all sinners go to the Dark Side. Many will go to the Light. Remember, we still have that choice to make. But, don't think that you can be evil in life and will still be able to go to the Light. Once on the Other Side, you do have to choose the right or the left door, but if you where evil in a life than your soul may be drawn to the Dark Side, no matter what, because you feel more comfortable there. But if you know that what you did was wrong and are truly sorry and want God's love, then you will be allowed to go to the Light."
"So dark souls want to be in the Dark Side? Then what? They just hangout there and do the things they like? I mean, shouldn't they be punished in some way?" Sarah asked.
"They are. Dark souls don't stay in the Dark Side forever. They are eventually pushed out and forced to live life over and over and over. But Dark souls will most likely be evil in every life they live, so when they die, they just go back to the Dark Side again and go through life again. But there are times, with enough hope and love, a dark soul will turn white and be able to go through the other door. Once there, that is where they will remain for eternity."
"Hmm, I see what you mean about what would happen if everyone knew that. Then everything would be crazy," Daniel nodded, "It still seems scary though."
Sarah shook her head, "Wait, this is all interesting and stuff, but what does that have to do with these visions we have?"
"You and Daniel are "old souls". The both of you have lived many different lives. The visions you are having are memories of those lives. This is rare though. Old souls only remember past lives when they are in contact with a soul they knew in those lives."
Daniel let out a small laugh, "I can't believe this. I can't believe that I've been sitting here listening to you telling us all this shit about old souls, dark souls...whatever and I almost believed it. Now you're saying that we're having visions of our past lives? No, it's impossible. It's umbelieviable. Tell me the truth. You put some kind of spell on us or some kind of brainwash to make us have those visions right?"
Lydia stared at the angry boy, "You would rather believe that I would go through so much trouble to brainwash you or put "a spell" on you. To just plain torment you for my amusement, then believe that they are just visions of your past lives?"
Daniel just sat in silence, glaring back at the woman. His breath was heavy. He was almost shaking, "How do we even know if past lives are real?"
"Don't you think it's a bit unfair to go through one very complicated life and then have this loving yet extremly jugdmental god decide just by that if you spend an eternity in "heaven or hell"? Come on Daniel. It makes sense. Past lives make sense. You know it's true. I see it your eyes. What are you so scared of?"
"I'll tell you what I'm scared of," Sarah finally spoke. She looked at Lydia, "What I understood, from everything that you just told us, old souls are basically dark souls. Are you saying that Daniel and I are evil, deep down?"
Lydia smiled, "No. There is one place one the Other Side that I did not mention. You see most souls go through life wondering why are they here? What is their purpose? They question if God is real and if they will go to this heavenly place in the end. Almost all of us question if we ourselves are truly good or if evil is buried deep within? A lot of times these thoughts are what cause depression, hopelessness, and despair. In a way, depression is your soul asking, 'Why am I still here? Why do have I to do this again? What did I do wrong? Am I just not good enough to go to the Light?' Your soul feels worthless and helpless. Your soul becomes vunerable to bad things. So when bad things happen to you in a lifetime, your soul feeds off that negative energy and the depression grows to where you feel it and you think that everything is hopeless and you are worthless." Lydia paused for a minute and then continued, "When you are in the Other Side and it's time to make that choice of where you want to go, for a lot of souls the choice is difficult. It doesn't come as easy as for the others. We don't know if we should go to the Light or if we truly belong in the Dark Side. The depression made us think that we're not good enough for God, but we don't want to go to the Dark Side either. So we wander around this place that's not quite dark, but it is away from the light. All the souls there feel miserable, angry, and alone. It's called the "The Holding Place".
"I'm sure you both have heard that people who commit suicide go to "hell". That's it, no questions asked. Well, that is not true. If you ever heard about someone's near-death experience while attempting suicide, they talk about a place where there are souls that mock and scorn them. A place full of anger, sadness and misery. That is the Holding Place. They mistaken it for "hell" because it's so terrible. Now a soul may choose to go through the Light once they realize that it's not hopeless and God does love them. But most of the time those souls will finally go through the Dark Side, not because they are evil but because it's the only way out. It's the only way they can be reborn and go through life again and try to get it right. That is what you and Daniel are. Your souls are, in a sense, trying to purify so that you will go to that right door."
Daniel leaned forward and rested his head in his hands. Sarah looked down at the floor and lightly touched her stomach. She closed her eyes. It all made perfect sense. Daniel had a hard time believing in God, but only because the teachings seemed so cruel and unjust. Sarah had felt the same way, but all of this, what Lydia just explained, seemed to be right. Both of their lives seemed to come together now. A lot of things were being answered.
Daniel sat up, "So we're just souls trying to find our way home?"
"Exactly," Lydia sighed.
"So that's it then," Sarah said, "We just have to realize that we are good enough to go to the Light? That seems simple enough." Lydia looked at her in silence and gave no response. "Isn't it?"
"I'm afraid not Sarah. It may sound simple but it's not. If I let you leave right now with only the information that I've just given you, your chances of returning to the Holding Place are still very strong."
"Wait, I don't understand," Daniel interupted, "You just told us that all we have to do is realize that that we're not worthless and then we'll pass through the right door."
"When you die your soul remembers everything. Not just from this life, but from past lives. It remembers every heartbreak, every tragedy, every bad thing that you either did or have happen to you. It will still feel unpure. Unless you can remember in this life, everything that happened to you in the past and work throught it, then you will return to the Holding Place. I can almost promise you that."
"So then what the hell are we supposed to do?" Daniel asked.
"I will help you. The both of you. It will take time and it will be very difficult, but we will get through this."
Sarah and Daniel looked at each other. Were they ready for this? Could they handle all the emotions they were about to endure? They did not know that many things, good and bad, were about to enter their lives. They did not know that they would soon experience the most difficult events of their lives. Their miseries were far from over.
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