Couple(s): Chloe/Lex
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Everything but the plot belongs to someone other than me.
Spoilers for: the other chapters
Feedback: Yes! Constructive criticism is good; compliments are better. Flames will be used to light my 'Creativity' aromatherapy candles.
Author's Note: I know this chapter is weak, but this story is beginning to drive me crazy; I know how it's going to end, and I'm way too anxious to get there. Hopefully the next chapter will be better.
******
Still Ill
There were knives digging into her head; Chloe knew for certain she had a migraine. *Mom used to get migraines; before they found the tumor* She forced her eyes to open, then closed them again when the sunlight drove the knives farther into her skull.
Next to her, Lex was sleeping peacefully. His hands were underneath his pillow; for a few seconds she wondered why he wasn't holding her. Then, it hit her. Guy. The rape. Screaming at her husband to leave her alone. The photos.
*What the hell did I do? I shouldn't have yelled at him; God, he probably hates me now* Biting her lip, she watched his chest rise and fall. Before she could stop herself, she kissed his mouth quickly. He stirred, sighed, then awakened.
"Hey," she whispered. "I'm sorry."
Lex propped himself up on his elbow and frowned. "For what?"
"Saying that I shouldn't have married you; that I wanted to leave. I just freaked out and started using you as a scapegoat. I really do need you; I'll *always* need you. If you can't find it in your heart to forgive me, I completely understand." Her eyes revealed that she was sincere.
He pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head. She leaned against his chest, listening to his heart beat; in his embrace, she was safe. "Of course I forgive you, Chloe."
Baffled, it was her turn to frown. "You're not angry?"
"Not at you."
"You're not pitying me, are you?"
"Look at me," he whispered, his voice firm.
She obeyed, staring into his cool eyes.
"I don't pity you; I'm your husband, I'm concerned. As for what you said, sure it hurt, but I knew deep down you didn't mean it. You didn't have anyone else to blame, so you blew up at me. It's perfectly understandable, given the situation." His hand wrapped around hers, and he kissed it gently. "Stop apologizing."
"I love you," she returned, resisting the urge to cry; the need to do so had been building since she left Guy's. However, she refused to give the bastard the satisfaction of knowing that he scared her. *Of course, I don't think that was his intention. Still, I'm going to keep it together*
"I love you, too." Lex drew his thumb along her cheek. "You're a fighter, you know. That's one of the many things I adore about you. Even so, you've been through a trauma; no one will think less of you if you need to break down."
She shrugged.
"At the very least, let me protect you; I feel like, if I'd done things differently, he wouldn't have found you." A pause, his eyes widened. "God, I just made it about me again."
This made her smile slightly. "Don't worry. It was selfish of me to say that." The smile faded. "He didn't find me; I went to his place. There was no where else I could go, and I needed to be with someone. Then he just...wouldn't stop touching me. I screamed at him, but he *wouldn't stop*. Afterward, he started saying that you don't deserve me, and that I should marry him instead. He wants to adopt John. He said he'd kill you." Her tone was casual, yet a tear slid down her cheek.
"Shh," he murmured automatically. "I'll take care of it."
"How the hell do you plan to do that?" she shot back. "And what are we going to do about John and Lena's education? We can't send them back there!"
Chloe was trembling, and he was relieved that she finally let herself react. "Don't think about that; right now, you need to get this out of your system. Just let it all go." He ran his fingers through her hair and watched her. "Want me to leave you alone?"
"No."
"All right; I'll stay. You're fine now. He won't touch you again. Go ahead and cry."
"I want to kill him," she insisted, shaking with sobs. "I really, honestly want to shoot him."
Lex buried his face in her hair and let out a sigh. "So do I, Clo."
******
'LEX LUTHOR WEDS LONG-', the newspaper clipping now read. Satisfied, Guy leered at the other half of the memorable photo which was crumpled on his desk. He smoothed it out one last time, spit on Lex's grinning image.
"You don't know how great you have it, Luthor," Guy growled. Fumbling in the pocket of his jeans, he removed a lighter. "You had to go and throw it all away by hurting them. Consider this a warning." Paper touched flame and the edges blackened. Soon, Lex was reduced to a tiny pile of ash.
Dropping the ashes on the floor, Guy ground them into his maroon rug with the heel of his steel-toed boot. "Burn in hell."
******
Lena slept lightly, like her mother. When Chloe carefully lowered herself onto the edge of her daughter's bed, Lena's bright eyes popped open. "Mommy," she said with a grin. "Are you feeling better?"
Smiling herself, Chloe nodded. She wouldn't ever fully recover, but her children didn't need to be burdened by that fact. "Yeah, I am. Thanks for asking. How are you?"
"Good, now that you're back." They hugged tightly, then Lena peered at her seriously. "Did Guy really hurt you?"
*I shouldn't outright 'lie', but I don't want to concern them. Besides, how do you explain rape to a child?* Bending the truth would do, she decided. "Yes, but I'm okay now. You won't see him again, just so you know; he's not a nice man."
Her daughter's enthusiastic nod was surprising. "I know he isn't. He made me and John cry."
*I should go shoot him right now. Better yet, I should saw his limbs off, one by one. Or have pigs eat him alive, like in 'Hannibal'. He screwed with the wrong family* "He did?" she asked, attempting vainly to remain calm about it.
"We told Daddy, though. Don't worry, Mommy. Daddy will protect us."
Chloe rested her forehead to her daughter's, smiled. "Yeah. How about we do something today; just you and me?"
"Yay! What do you wanna do?" She crawled into her mother's lap and was wrapped in her embrace.
"You decide."
Lena scrunched up her face while she thought. "Maybe we could...no. How about...nah." Then it came to her, and her eyes glowed. "Can you braid my hair?"
She hadn't done that for years; she'd missed it. "Sure, honey. Why don't you get dressed and after breakfast I can do that for you. Is that all you want to do today? We could watch movies or go shopping, too." Chloe wanted to do anything to keep her mind off of Guy.
"Maybe. Can you stay here for a little bit?"
"You bet." Stretching out across the familiar white and pink unicorn comforter--it had belonged to her when she was Lena's age--Chloe let her eyes take in the room.
It had been the nursery years before; the window that had been broken when Lena was kidnapped--*don't think about that, Clo*--had long since been replaced; billowy pink curtains hung over it now. The formerly-yellow walls were a deep pink with light pink trim. Over in the corner stood a white, child-sized rocking chair. Lena's army of dolls and stuffed animals was piled on its soft, pink cushion. The room brought back warm memories of Chloe's own childhood.
"What should I wear today?" Lena wondered, from inside her huge, walk-in closet.
*My daughter, the clothes horse* Chloe thought with a grin, joining her. "Well, what do you feel like?"
The girl scrutinized a pair of black stretch pants and a pink t-shirt. "This outfit is boring," she proclaimed gravely, sloppily hanging the pieces of clothing back on their respective hangars.
Biting back a laugh, Chloe fingered a denim dress which was embroidered with tiny flowers; it had been hers. She had watched her mother sew the entire thing by hand; Misses Sullivan hadn't liked sewing machines. "What about this?"
Lena didn't know the garment's history, though she was aware that it had belonged to her mother. "That's perfect." After careful consideration, she chose a pair of rainbow knee socks to complete the ensemble. "I'm going to get ready now, Mom."
"Okay. I'm going to go wake up your brother."
"Mom?" Lena called softly.
Turning, Chloe raised her eyebrows. "Yes?"
"I love you."
It wasn't new for her children to tell her that, but it still warmed her heart. "I love you, too, Lena-girl. Now get dressed!"
******
For a six year-old, John was incredibly perceptive. *Hell,* Lex told him wryly, *he's incredibly perceptive, period* The things his son picked up on were baffling; there were occasions when John realized moods were off before Lex himself did.
Father and son were lounging on the latter's bed, talking softly. John was expressing worry over the fact that Chloe had left the afternoon before, then come back trembling; Lex was attempting vainly to assure him that everything was going to be fine. "Mommy *is* okay, right? Guy didn't hurt her so bad that you hafta kill him, did he?"
"John!" Lex yelped, more out of shock than reprimand. "Where on *Earth* did you get that idea?"
The boy sighed in apparent exasperation. "Dad, it's obvious that she was upset yesterday. I dunno what Guy did to her, but I know it was bad. When people do bad stuff, you kill them, right?"
Lex was speechless; he couldn't begin to fathom what made John think that way. *Certainly I want to do Guy in, preferably very slowly, but why does John--*
"Hey, boys," Chloe greeted them with as much cheer as she could muster. Lex was pleased to see that her smile was no longer forced; he had a feeling she would be all right eventually. "Mind if I join you?"
"'course not, Mom," John responded, crawling across the bed in his dinosaur pajamas until he was directly in front of her. "Come in and sit by me."
She did so, giving him a backwards hug when he clambered into her lap. "Morning again, Lex," she whispered over her son's shoulder. In acknowledgement, he nodded, smiled secretly, and winked. "What were you guys talking about?" she asked John, her voice returning to its normal level.
John said it so frankly that both adults were taken aback. "How Daddy needs to kill Guy for what he did to you."
******
"John has a point," Lex reminded her about an hour later, when they were cleaning up after breakfast. Martha had gone home to get some farm work done, and Lex had decided that, since he rarely did any actually cleaning, he'd assist his wife.
"I know he does. What I don't understand is how that thought got into his head in the first place." She turned on the sink, and his reply was drowned out by the sound of rushing water. "What was that, sweetie? Sorry."
Lex, who was drying and putting away the dishes, smirked. "'s okay. I said that he probably sees gun-play on TV all the time, and he correctly associated Guy's behavior with that of a 'bad guy'; it's logical, really."
Chloe blew a stream of air through her lips and handed him the last plate. "Yeah, but I'm still concerned."
Standing behind her, Lex kissed her neck. "I don't like it much either, but that isn't what we need to be worried about at this point in time. What do you want to do about Guy?"
She twisted around in his embrace, wrapping her arms loosely around his neck so that her damp hands were away from his body. "I want to kill him," she replied seriously, "but is that really wise?"
"Clo," he sighed, "I don't mean to belabor the obvious, but he *raped* you. Of course we should kill him. In fact, I'll do it myself. With my bare hands. He's done nothing but wreck havoc on our family; it's only what he deserves."
When she gently left his warm arms and strolled into the living room, he had no choice but to follow. "How do we justify murder to the police, or the media?" she wondered nervously, stretching out on the couch.
*She's concerned about 'that'?* Lex tried to keep from rolling his eyes; she frequently displayed an infuriating tendency to side-step the real issues. He was accustomed to it, but that didn't keep him from getting annoyed from time-to-time. "Honestly, that doesn't matter right now!" He sat cross-legged on the floor, near her head.
"Well, it should," she shot back.
The look in her eyes wasn't new; Lex had first noticed it seven years before, the night Lena was kidnapped. It had vanished the day their daughter had returned, and hadn't resurfaced until that very moment: she was absolutely terrified.
"Chloe, sweetie, you've no reason to be afraid. You don't have to come with me." He got on his knees so he could kiss her. "There's nothing you have to worry about anymore. I'll go shoot him right now. It'll be all over," Lex said all this softly, hoping to soothe her.
Instead, his words had the opposite effect; her bluish eyes grew ever wider, and she grasped the front of his shirt tightly; as if to hold him in place. "Don't go now. Wait a while."
Prying her hands from his front, he held them in his own. "Why? If it's going to drive you crazy, I should get it done immediately." *I love her more than anything, but she can be so damn...schizophrenic sometimes*
"I just have a feeling that it's better for you to wait. Trust me, Lex; don't go today." After a thoughtful pause, she added, "I'm not sure that I want *you* to go at all. He said he'd kill you--he owns a gun. I wouldn't doubt that he's fully serious." Her hands were freezing when they gripped his harder.
"Darling, relax; you're going to get yourself worked-up over nothing. If it will make you feel better, I won't do it today." He smiled down at her, and, a few seconds later, she managed to smile back. "Weren't you going to braid Lena's hair?"
Her eyebrows shot up. "I completely forgot! I'll go do that now." Her arms were around him again, and she pressed her mouth to his. "After I do that. I love you, Lex. I still don't see why you put up with me."
Grinning from the kiss, he picked her up and set her on the floor. "Because you're adorable, that's why I put up with you. Oh, don't make faces at me; what do you want me to say? That I put up with you because you make me a better person? I thought we got the trite, sappy stuff out of the way a long time ago."
She chuckled and meandered toward the stairs. "Who am I to argue with that?"
******
It would be so easy; this, Guy knew. He could grab his rifle, high-tail it to Luthor Manor, and put Chloe out of her misery. He was certain that Lex needed to go away for good. He simply didn't know when to put his plan in motion. Guy and Chloe had only slept together two days before; while he couldn't wait much longer to have his Chloe, he wanted lull Lex into a false sense of security.
*That way, when I strike, I'll take him by surprise*
The gun rested across his lap, his fingers stroked it lightly. It pained him to wait, but then the satisfying sounds of Lex's begging for his life filled Guy's head. *The wait will be worth it*
******
Chloe raked her fingers carefully through Lena's thick hair, searching for any knots. There were none, so she began to separate her daughter's mane into three equal sections. "Let me know if I hurt you, okay?"
"Okay," she echoed. She was attempting to keep perfectly still; it was comical to watch.
"You can relax a little, honey," Chloe teased. Lena was sitting with her legs hanging over the side of her bed; it was quite an effort to keep herself from swinging them back and forth.
"Really?" Relief flooded her voice, and her shoulders dropped.
Chloe laughed. "Of course." Silence filled the room while Chloe concentrated on the task. This didn't mean that she wasn't forcing herself to think of something to say to her daughter; they'd never had any problems conversing before, but she suddenly felt awkward.
"Sweetie?" she began finally.
"Yeah?" Lena asked curiously.
"Is there anything you want to talk about?"
The girl half-turned her head so she could frown at her mother. "No, why?"
"No reason."
More silence. Though Chloe hadn't braided hair for years, her fingers could work automatically. She allowed her mind to wander, thinking about everything and nothing in a span of about half an hour. When she was nearly done with Lena's hair, it struck her that Lena was being uncharacteristically quiet.
"You aren't talking much today, Lena. Are you feeling okay?"
"Is it true Daddy's gonna shoot Guy?"
The question was so unexpected that Chloe was relieved her daughter couldn't see her reaction. "Where did you hear that?"
"John."
*One of us needs to have a talk with him* she decided, while stalling for time. She didn't know what to say. "Don't think about that."
"Well, is it true?"
*You can definitely tell she's my daughter; even at seven she refuses to let things go* "No."
"Okay." Lena sounded completely unconvinced.
"Don't take that tone with me; if I say it's not true, it's not true," Chloe replied as sternly as possible; Lex was much better at discipline. "Now, why don't you go check out your hair, and make sure you like it."
Her daughter bounded over to the floor-length mirror that hung from the back of her closet door. She twirled and preened like a little diva; Chloe smirked. "Like it?"
"I love it, Mommy. Thank you." They hugged, then joined hands. "Let's go talk to Daddy."
******
Lex was in his office, doing work for the first time in days. Though he had been doing fine for about an hour, he quickly began to have intense trouble concentrating; despite his best efforts to ward away the thoughts, he couldn't stop thinking about Guy raping Chloe. Guy oblivious to her pleas; Guy saying he loved her, even though she continued to scream at him; Guy threatening to kill Lex, supposedly to make Chloe happy.
It was torturing him. To relax himself for a second, he unlocked the secret compartment in his top desk drawer; the cool metal of his hand gun was calming. He had long ago thought about moving the weapon to the bedroom--so he and Chloe weren't completely vulnerable at night--but she'd vetoed the idea instantly.
She'd said, 'What if the kids find it? What if I'm home alone in the living room, and I need it? Leave it in the desk, Lex.' She'd won that battle, though she almost always did; he'd realized years before that she had more common sense when it came to traumatic events, so he often caved first.
Case in point: even though he'd been working on suppressing it nearly his entire life, Lex frequently let his temper flare up for stupid reasons. Whenever he blew up at Chloe during a fight, she would calmly wait for him to finish his tirade, then she'd whisper that she understood his side of things, and wasn't angry. That was all it took for him to settle down.
When he fingered the gun, he felt the familiar, tense knot in his stomach; he was going to explode any second. For once, he didn't care whether or not his wife made him calm down:
Either way, he'd be good and livid when he laid eyes on Guy.