Takeo – We like to rant ‘cause ranting is good. Welcome to the Kongo show! (Camera backs up and Shuu runs on stage.)

Shuu – Hi everyone and welcome to, the Kongo Show, with me, Shuu Rei Fuan as your host.

< Clapping, mad clapping>

Audience - We love you Shuu!

Shuu -Love you too! It's been a year since we were last on the air. Apparently, summer is a good time to rant 'cause that's when we have time to play. Today's guests are from Digimon Season 2. We'll have them all here after this commercial break.

$ Commercial, coming up! $

% Are you sick and tired of your favorite animes ending the wrong way? %

Brief clip of the end of Season 2 as Ken is showed married to Miyako. Many daisukenMlers lose their lunch, breakfast and what they had for lunch last week.

%Then call 1 800 TOEISHI and we will visit the producers of the show and offer coercive action %

Shots of beefed up anime guys pounding on Toei animators who are huddled in pain and shock.

%Call us TODAY and get whatever ending of Digimon that you wish. As long as it's yaoi and yuri sailing, we'll support you whole heartedly!

P.S. We are not responsible for endangerment of any anime creators who believe that they can control their fans. Otakus, especially Yaoi otakus are dangerous beings. Be aware and don't screw with them. %

(Camera zips back to Shuu)

Shuu - Well, ^^;; It seems that err… let's get back to the show! First up is that widely know and squeezable leader of the Digidestined, Daisuke Motomiya!

(Audience squeals as Daisuke steps on to the stage waving)

Daisuke - Hello!

Shuu- Please, have a seat Daisuke. (Daisuke sits down)

Daisuke - I love your show, I watch it all the time!

Shuu - Well then, let's begin with the important question. Do you really like Hikari?

$ I can't stand that kid. So bitchy ever since she grew up. $

Daisuke - Hikari's nice and all, but it's just a cover up for my love of Ken Ichijouji. Have you * seen * that guy?! (Daisuke gets hentai twinkle in his eye)

Shuu - Ah Ken, also your enemy until the end of the series?

Daisuke - Yes! I'm pretty sure that my "friends" would have scalped me if knew that I had the hots for Ken. But since the season's over, I shouldn't care, right?

Shuu -Maybe, maybe not. Now let's welcome the other person with a crush on Ken, Miyako.

(Audience has mixed feelings on Miyako and remains silent)

Miyako - (looks hurt) Fine, be that way! ( things are promptly thrown at her and she ducks into her seat)

Shuu - Yes, the audience hates you for even thinking that you and Ken could possibly be together. (Audience strokes various weapons while glaring at Miyako)

Miyako - (gulps) I see. Well, I liked Ken, truth be told, but Daisuke is my friend and I know that he actually *loves* Ken. I happen to be in love with Hikari (Audience falls over and sweatdrops)

Shuu - Ahh well, so you and Daisuke are pretending to have crushes on each other's loves? You kids are strange.

Miyako - Actually we all jogress with the people that we love. Me and Hikari, Daisuke and Ken… ugh, it's so obvious that they like each other! And of course, little Iori and Takeru.

Shuu - Speaking of which, come on out Takeru!

(Takeru walks out on stage and Audience remains silent again)

Takeru - Ummh, hi?

Shuu - Trust me, don't make any sudden movements. The Audience doesn’t really like you current digidestined with the exception of Ken, and Daisuke due to your treatment of him when he tried to reform.

$ Damn right! (pokes voodoo dolls of Hikari, Takeru and Miyako and almost burns Iori with glee $

Takeru - Well, I kind of like Ken too. He's kind of cute. Iori is a little strange for me.

Daisuke - Ken is mine! Don't you even dare touch him!

Takeru - Make me Dai no baka!

Daisuke - I'm not stupid. Omae o korusu! (Daisuke leaps off his seat and attacks Takeru. All Tasuke supporters drool)

$Hey stop that! Ahh, my precious seats!( Puts up a sign that says 'Daiken and Taken zone') $

Shuu - Please, stop fighting or I'll be forced to hurt you. (Daisuke and Takeru stop fighting.) Oi, these things can get really nasty. Anyway, lets' bring out Hikari and Iori!

Audience - Damn you to hell., Moero, moero! ( Hikari and Iori scream as they dodge several fire balls thrown at them)

Shuu - Hey, you made it! Hi ^^

Hikari - (panting) They really hate us.

Iori - Trust me, it's me that they hate more, right?

Audience - Damn right! ( they start cheering)

Shu- Whoa ^^;; Okay, what's your take on all these pairings Hikari?

Hikari - Well, I guess I could live with Miyako although she's always drooling anytime she sees Mimi (Audience hisses at the mention of another hated Digidestined) I feel so inferior! ( Hikari starts crying)

Miyako - I'm so sorry Hikari, I'm sorry! ( Miyako hugs Hikari)

Audience - Awwh (sniffs are heard)

Shuu - Okay, I guess we've resolved that, and what about you Iori?

Iori - Due to my younger age, the chances of me pairing up are next to nil, but I might end up with Takeru after he's screwed up either Daisuke of Ken's lives. Or if we come in contact with the first season digidetsined, I'm would flock to Jyou Kido. I love Jyou! ( Iori blushes and audience awwhs)

Audience - (nods) We like you again ^^

Shuu- -_-; Right. Anyway, we're going on a commercial break. When we return, we shall meet Ken, the most talked about bishounen on Season 2 Digimon!

% Do you know any digimon in love that can't see that obvious attraction? %

Shot of Ken and Daisuke nodding as they point to Wormmon and Veemon.

%Then, our product "Zudo#9" is the answer to your prayers! Just spray this on your digimon and lock them in a room. They'll go at it in ten nanoseconds. This product is guaranteed to work for all digimon in denial! %

Shot of Wormon and Veemon digivolving to ExVeemon and Stingmon and making out like crazy.

Shot of Ken and Daisuke grinning like idiots as they prey on other unsuspecting digimon all across the land

%Yes, Zudo#9 is guaranteed to work and work well. Our latest version, Tento#5 will work on humans soon. Please use with caution as the perfume acts as a strong aphrodisiac.

Shot of Daisuke tampering with Ken's water system and pouring the entire pint of perfume into his bath water. Minutes later, Ken is now is full slut mode and Daisuke is grinning 'cause he locked Ken in his room.

Daisuke - Thanks to Tento#5 I get all of Ken Ichijouji for myself. You lose Takeru! %

(Camera zooms back to the stage where three sets of eye sand twinkling with evil)

Shuu - (smacks his hand to his forehead) Why, why why?

Daisuke - Sugoi! I've got to get that!

Shuu - Oh no you don't. Now let's bring out Ken!

Audience - Ken, we love you and your angst ridden soul, be our leader!

Ken - (smiles and waves) Hi everyone. ( Audience faints because of Ken's eyes and his hair)

$ Awwh Ken-chan ^^$

Shuu -Okay, crew, please revive the fainting audience. ( Crew zaps audience and they are wide awake)

Ken- (sits down and blushes) Hi Daisuke.

Audience - Awwh!

Shuu - Damn it. Take control and stop slobbering!

Audience - Sir yes sir!

Shuu- ^_^;; anyway welcome to the show Ken.

Ken - I'm happy to be here.

Daisuke - Ken, I love you!

Ken - I love you too Dai-chan.

Takeru - Wait, but I love you Ken! ( Ken eeps)

Ken - Ummh Ta-kun, I don't, I mean…

Daisuke - I'll battle for your hand my pretty. ( Daisuke pulls out a light saber and points it at Takeru) Fight me like the dog you are blondie.

Takeru - (eyes glowing in outrage) I'll show you heathen!

Shuu - Hmm…seems as if everything is out of hand. It's been a great day folks.(Shuu ducks as Takeru and Daisuke start fighting and Ken yells for Daisuke to stop while Iori yells for Takeru to stop. Hikari and Miyako are holding each other )

$ Err, don't look at me for an answer! $

Shuu - Join us next week as we interview the characters of Takeo's upcoming original fic, which lacks a title right now. Bye bye!

(Audience oohs and aahs as Daisuke disarms Takeru, tosses away his own beam saber, takes Ken's hand and runs away)

Takeru - Noo! ( He is then smothered by Iori kissing him)

Audience - Awwwh!

Shuu -The show's over go home!

Till next time ^^