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Wash Your Ass

* From The Ancient Teachings of Sri Poopy-Poopy (approximately 2000 BC, or before) translated into Modern Funky English by Sri Dookie-Dookie (2004 AD).

Wash Your Ass, I say, for I am Sri Poopy-Poopy !

Let clean flowing waters rinse your ass out fully.

Sanitize your whole body, hole and all !

Wash your mouth, and Wash your Ass !

Stay clean, wash up and down, and don’t fuck a bunch of hookers.

Keep your hands clean when preparing and eating food.

Drink only fresh water and eat only fresh food.

No foods are unholy, unless they are poisonous or unclean.

Taking the lives of plants is the same as taking the lives of animals, but people must do this for food in order to survive.

All things on earth must take life in order to sustain their own life, that is the way of the world, yet we can still try to find balance and harmony in this world.

Don't take more than you need, help keep the earth clean and things beautiful.

Treat plants and animals as humanely as possible, and their deaths for your life should be a Holy and sacrificial event.

People should embrace Peace and non-violence and not kill other people, unless it is their will for you to help end their physical suffering, or unless it is used as punishment on a criminal who has killed other people.

Don’t shit where you eat, and don’t eat where you shit.

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