Thoughts

I know you wonder if I’ve ever stopped to ask myself
How I got here
Where starving is salvation
And pain, my only escape.
How did negativity become
my only nourishment
when love was always there?
All concepts that swirl around
Dancing beautifully inside of my brain
Never coming to a point of rest
Never finding solution
I exist in a constant state of irony
I only want the pain to stop
… so, I sever the skin that I hate
just to watch it bleed
I only want acceptance
…so, I run from those who love me
I only want perfection
…so, I destroy my body
and run from the very thought of normalcy
what is it like
to live without this?
I wish I could ask someone
I wish it could be explained
So, I could understand for just one moment.
But how do you explain to the blind
What it is to see
When you’ve never known
What it is not to?
…

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