Mood:
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Now Playing: Jem - Wish I
It's that time again where I make a post after a long period of time of inactive blogging. You guys should know by now that I do not post something unless there are stuff which I think would be worth sharing with people. I mean, come on. Nobody wants to hear about trivial matters like 'Oh university has started again' and all that whinging. I am sure most of you already have enough of those whilst reading your other friends' posts about their miserable dramatic lives. Unapologetic, I find that most people that I once knew whom I have decided to disassociate myself from are like that. They are mainly the people who are attention-deprived and most of the time make things to seem like the world revolves around them. Some unsurprisingly imply to get sympathy from their readers. You know I speak the truth.
Anyhow yes for those of you who were wondering, yes I made last minute plans to return to Malaysia to visit my family and friends during the Chinese New Year period. I arrived in Malaysia at 5:45am in the morning on the 29th of January which was a Sunday. I am writing this in detail so that incase I forget, I can always refer haha. Nothing much happened back home in Malaysia much to my disappointment. All my friends were either busy working or studying and most of them I only got to hang out like once or twice.
You would be surprise how nearly two years can change your friends when you have not been in touch with them in real life. I guess I understand now how some people whom never kept in touch with each other would be able to lose track and eventually just forget about them altogether, as if they were only memories. Normally I would like to think its sad, but trying to look at a different perspective, it might be actually good for if these friends were actually close in the first place, they would make the effort to always keep in touch with each other. I do not care if it was e-mail or even snail mail. It still would count as an effort!
I weighed myself before returning to Malaysia, and found that I was 100kg. Yes it may seem heavy to you typical asian people but then again, I am no typical asian. So bleh. What I was trying to say was, that I have been weighing a 100kg for a few years now and somewhat glad that my weight did not increase. I was busy boasting about it until I came back to Melbourne and weighed myself and found that I had put on 5kg. I think probably due to the food back home in Malaysia which I missed so much and overindulged. Especially since I did not really have much to do back home except sit around the whole day having very minimal movements.
However, I have been weighing myself pretty frequent nowadays and have found my weight slowly decreasing again. You see, the reason for this is because I only eat whenever I feel hungry. Which would be at most, twice a day. Being in front of the computer can do this to you. Your mind is so focused on the activities on the computer that it does not have time to tell you that you are hungry. Most people think that I am torturing myself by starving. The truth is, I do not feel any gastric pains or anything like that. Whereas when I was in Malaysia, I ate 3 times a day... and not move around much. Yes! I ate even when I was not hungry.
Initially I had alot to write on my discoveries or enlightenment as I wish to call it but at the moment I cannot seem to recall most of them except for this somewhat unimportant information. You know how in Malaysia they always advertise face cream/lotions/wash whatever it is that ladies apply on their face to try to enhance their looks. Well in Malaysia there are all of these products to make your skin fairer (seem whiter; for you people with very limited vocabulary). In Malaysia its all about being fairer and the more dead you looked, the better you think you were. I just saw a commercial on television where they were advertising this Johnsons & Johnsons body and face lotion (respectively) where it gradually tans your skin the more often you use it.
To asians, fairer seems more feminine or something, I do not know. To western people, being tan is more attractive. I guess maybe it is because being tan is like evidence that you've been in the sun presumably being active and everything. There is also the old fact where we black haired asians try to color our hair all other shades of color like the caucasian people originally have and they in turn would want to have black hair. The grass is truly greener on the other side.
Most people are surprised that I do not find living in a foreign country enjoyable. They always assume just because its supposedly better in another country , makes all the reason for me to want to live there. I do not deny that Melbourne is a great city to live in. It does not mean anything at all if you have nobody to hang out with, and no family to turn to. Oh and the fact that they can never have authentic Malaysian food in their authentic environment, where rats and cockroaches thrive hahaha. Everything here closes too early for us Malaysians' liking.
Those people that actually do not intend to go home to where they came from, are probably deprived of freedom their whole lives by their parents. I am not one of them. I have had freedom all my life. My parents treated me maturely and like an adult all my life. I guess that is probably why my growing up phase was not really enjoyable but hey instead of getting messed up and hanging with the wrong crowd or getting into trouble, I used that, learnt from that and became a better person than most people I know. Do not mistake this for being arrogant. I am merely proud of what I have come to be despite my less than pleasurable history.
And for you out there who wonder why things do not happen the way you hope it would. It is because they were not meant to happen. I am not saying that our future is predestined or 'fated' as some of you believe.
The word 'fate' is misused by people who do not want to be responsible of their own lives and the consequences they face. They say it is 'fate' and imply in one way or another that there is nothing they could have done about it. I would like to make it clear that nothing in life is 'fated'. Sure some things are not suppose to happen and some do. However there are reasons for these things to happen and its not just simply 'fated' to do so.
One good example. If the world was scientifically 'fated' to exist and all its living things existed for the sole purpose of existing, or rather surviving, why are there so many variety and differnt designs in everything? If a bee was to look after its own existence, or reproduce, why then does it pollenate? How does it know that there are flowers for it to do so? Also, how would the flower know that there is a bee out there?
Do you know why we call things, 'creations'? Because they are created. Think about it.