Diary 171

Theo Verelst Diary Page

Fri Dec 27 2002, 4:29 AM

I've decided after good example to write some diary pages with toughts and events.

Oh, in case anybody fails to understand, I'd like to remind them that these pages are copyrighted, and that everything found here may not be redistributed in any other way then over this direct link without my prior consent. That includes family, christianity, and other cheats. The simple reason is that it may well be that some people have been ill informed because they've spread illegal 'copies' of my materials even with modifications. Apart from my moral judgement, that is illegal, and will be treated as such by me. Make as many references to these pages as you like, make hardcopies, but only of the whole page, including the html-references, and without changing a iota or tittel...

And if not? I won't hesitate to use legal means to correct wrong that may be done otherwise. And I am serious. I usually am. I'm not sure I could get 'attempt to grave emotional assault' out of it, but infrigement on copyright rules is serious enough. And Jesus called upon us to respect the authorities of state, so christians would of course never do such a thing. Lying, imagine that.

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Fri Dec 27 2002, 4:31 AM

Though I've been active enough, the diary page department has been low on production lately, I didn't even finish the last few much, though I did plan to. I'll look them up and see what I do.

At least I got most everything of my various sites downloaded and ready to be backuped a bit in a more permanent technology, and am working on getting the combination of all pages and materials together, with sorted out links, and all in one place, again enabling a lot of broken stuff making the whole tree of files work again. I'll do some automated link updating and such, and first see what material was spread where, what
versions are the most recent, that sort of thing. I'm not sure what I'll do with the original sites right now, given they have less space than before, which isn't exactly progress, and not inline with computer cores getting faster and bigger/smaller every few years...

The local server

Don't hesitate and forget to try out the latest addition to my world wide web presence imperium (gmph?), which is on a server most
of the time I can access locally, so I can make it active and much more flexible and powerfull, given certain limitations (I guess it may not be commercial, and bandwidth isn't miserable, but no university T1 line directly connected to the backbone, and it may not be available all the time though it was the last week).

Access the main page here or click on the image:

The server is a tcl/tk based web server which I customized to my needs, and which probably is quite safe, and certainly quite reliable, no major security leaks most probably, no possibilities to even mess with it remotely except when I program it to be so myself, all is completely readable, even while it runs, tcl code, so there's not much hidden about what it does.

Recently I got around hacking the openssl certificate and key managing tools I downloaded from I guess openssl.org or which may have been part of the latest cygwin distribution, which after some hassling, manual reading and translating the tcl server secure socket layer extension directions into my version of openssl now give me valid and working master and public keys and certificates and requests which satisfy both versions of the netscape and explorer I tried to put close the desired 'secure server' lock on the status line, to indicate a secure connection has been established, after accepting the reasonable looking certificate from my server, for instance just for the duration of the browser session.

Try for ourself this link is secure (when the server is on), click accept certificate, possibly permanently so you won't have to do it again, unless I see the need to change certificates, which may happen as I am still experimenting, and click ok when the entering a secure page dialog box shows up: the lock on the bottom of netscape should now be closed. There is no danger to it I can oversee now, except maybe when the certificate would be a tricked one, which can be verified by checking other channels and comparing its data, and that would just mean that you would be tricked into permanently believing another destination (for which permanent and incircumventable name server and/or IP messing would be needed), for the rest its the same as browsing to a standard server, which usually works just fine, too, of course . I guess I could post around my public key and certificate to my various sites and maybe over mail, to gain sufficient trust that me is me, and that my site realy is the secure site is can be to safely communicate with, with no other parties mingling or messing with your connection and information.

Getting a verisign trusted certificate is probably not a matter of a few quarters, and other parties, who with major aplomb offer similar facilities probably aren't exactly for free either. So as it is, being my own certificate authority seems to suit just fine.

How about those keys and requests and certificates and challenges, message digests, encryption and passphrases ? I think I'll do a page on them when I'm more comfortable with finding time for it, though maybe I'll go into it a bit.

The idea of various keys for the same encryption method is that a public key can be used to decode certain data, but not to encode data which is recogniseable by decryption through the same key. That means that a server can encode data, and everyone can decode it with a publically available key, but nowone can mess with that data and make it decodable by the standard secure part of the web browser: changing the data would require encoding it after the changes in such a way that the same (publically known) key would correctly decode the tampered with data, which can be made pretty hard when the data changing party doesn't know the encryption key, which is only known to the server when it encodes the data to be readable by the public key. So it is impossible or hard to take the identity of that server and try to present people in their webbrowser with data which is decodable by the original servers' public key. Such key is in the certificate which one can accept of a certain server, and which of course must indeed come from that party, which is why the latest distributions of browsers contain a number of certificates of so called trusted secure sites, with that key of theirs in it, so that if one connects to them, one can be quite sure that that little lock only closes when the site connected to is indeed that site.

To secure that another party cannot pose as you, and that the data you transmit and receive cannot with some effort be still readable, a few of such tricks or schemes combined in various directions are applied, for now I won't elaborate. Issues involved are client identity confimation possibilities, both by computer address as by for instance cookies and unique properties, dynamic rerouting of data and the uncrackability of the browsers built-in encryption and decryption capabilities. The number of possibilities for keys and certificates, and the type of encryption algorithms and the possible rate of trying to crack them can be choosen such that at least a quite high probability of never cracking the codes can be expected, depending on the hackers technical (and scientific) possibilities and the number of parties joining in the untrustability attempt.

What about life

Well no public secret is that there is at least someone in my life, who is not average, but who is not queen of all hearts in the world, which is good. The rest is not outside the mess which seems to rule way to much in holland, the fascist regime at least has been in official gouvernment after many years blown up, which is quite relevant, and in line with the only political party I ever voted for with clean enough conscience, which is officially from its foundation made to 'blow up' the frustrated state system and to promote attention for the environment, and which is now officially ( I saw webcast and live national tv) acknowledged to be right, even though not many voters seem to dare or want to follow reasonable voting logic.

When I was student, the bankrupcy of the ideologies occured roughly in the time I left my parental home and was interested in many things, amoung which leftism, and the way of ruling which then started much have led to the fascists ways of the present, maybe as it was in the past because holland is just to small to make it as world dominating nazis. ha ha but not realy. Lets get it all under control, and make the world Jesus bought under our dominion if we can. Well, we can't, I'm sure. Even in the time of catholic inquisition, which included killing and torturing alledged heretics, that is non-catholics, there was no overall agreement to the power system, and people resisted it, sometimes paying with their lives, and in the end won, because that system doesn't rule the whole western world anymore, for real.

In personal sense, for instance looking at recent video clips

The latest queen performance on tv smelled like second world war. Maybe one would better be in germany in this time, I am sure by long time repeated experience it at least feels better, spiritually and emotionally. And certainly walking around in Aachen doesn't bring about the continuous display of presence of certain adverse streams in society to claim their position and miserable ways to be quite important, visible and against everything worthwhile, good, normally democratic (which isn't normal or necessarily nice, of course) and every public display of even small degrees of personal and emotional freedom, and of the type of grandure where one wants to use and stress freedom of speech , preferably about things where the first amendment equivalent is realy about.

'But we must all stick together', or 'but then you are not 'in' anymore' ! Goddamnit, what the hell... So lets see, I regularly see cat life which is more revealing in that sense than many babylon inhabitants have written on their poor and as it seems not very happy or alive foreheads. Certain spirits seem to want to make their presence all to clear, and I am sure very many people take it they are the holy Spirit himself, while I am very 100% absolutely and completely sure it is not, Very not. Deadly seriously not.

It seems certain 'hidden' and in my opinion (which is at least decades old) completely redundant circles spent time and effort making certain miserable spiritual rulers (deamons that is, they exist, if you're christian (well well..) read your bible, the supposed son of God dealt with them for years, without problems, though) ac a certain way so many people believe them to be the divine ruler of the universe himself.

And they delude people, of course. They did thousands of years ago, and they still do nothing special, noting interesting, nothing new. No progress here, decine more likely. What a reverence for their anti-christ demon or person, thing-which-actually-speaks (more like screaming, lately), local sorcerers (yes they do not always rule the world, realy not) satanists and general child abusers and their victim madonas, for absolutely nothing worth it. Like a good fascist should. Makes the secret filthy rich and powerfull and their catholic friends or collegues very happy. Well done, boy. Continue that way, my son. Yes, indeed you are realy special my daughter (gmpf).

So what am I, an outlaw? Nah, though my bank probably has special feelings about me, I've an offical dutch passport and drivers licence, but the number of doors which remain close weighed against my weight and capabilities and obvious popularity and like-factor is amazing enough if it were funny. Maybe when I can take my own yacht with some I like enough to the bahamas in freedom in various ways I'll think different, but the system I observe all to often and which would have robbed me of all dignity, self esteem, identity in more ways than I like to contemplate and of all kinds minus maybe a few of honour and dignity to begin with, without even noticing much is a few touches to seriously evil in its presence, and deserves destruction.

A bomb under the system

That is official point of view of the dutch party I mentioned (d66) since its birth in my birthyear (66) to deal with the relations and constructions in the dutch political constellation. The deals, buildings of bricks and abuse morter, the corruption, and now the stagnated higher middle class in its fascists strive for nothingness and damaging of what has something valueable to offer for the sake of opportunist power games where the end target is nihilism and just 'giving over' of everything that is to get away from guilt and condamnation and altogether become a new person through giving every normal human way up to the higher powers which be (how rediculously rainbow-ish or new age-ish can one get).

The original head of that party, hans van Mierlo he has been something publically visible in nato I think later on, who has lived on the street some time, as I have felt forced to some time ago, completely and utterly against every preference I have or had, let that be clear, I was preserving some dignity and prevented acknowledging by any response at all what some formerly closes ones planned against me, as a former friend of mine who birthday gifted me a copy of GC Marquez's 'a chronicle of an anounced death' years ago must have refered to, and wanted to first make very clear and sure that my vision, analysis of what was and is going on, my chosen way out, and the sum and relevance of my capabilities where not going to be ascribed to others, considered easily refutable and wrong, and would have to be acknowledged and minimally honoured at least, forced if necessary, for which it was (and to some extend is) important to beyond reasonable doubt prove the validity and degree of mastery of my professional skills at high level, scientifically, techinically, practically, contentwise and vision wise.

A system which has left me with no honourable way out of a relatively straightforward problem (a scheming reference) while being as capable and provably relevant as I am, and then continuing the way it has, quite publically deserves nothing but that: a bomb under it.

I lived near R. scholte some time, one of hollands most known visual artists of some time ago, who has been in game if that is the name where such a thing happened to his physical person, disabling him, which is of course not what I mean, such shit never works is my opinion, except maybe prevent certain people from causing certain kinds of damage. So that is not what I mean, that is the sort of nihilist, fascist thinking I hate and dispise.

So a methaforical bomb? Nah, not necessarily, when certain fascist guntas make it to the top and their illuminati or catholic friends sponsor them to significant power, and they want to preach and use their abusive and oppressive and unhonarable and otherwise dispicable ways with force and all kinds of secret police like constuctions, as if the f* SS is ruling things according to the headman of the secret plan and polit bureau equivalents who are if you lucky just playing you against certain child abusing family clans, and worse when you're unlucky, unintelligent, or information or money have-not. Or black ? Or woman? It seems such problems are nothing much in comparison with violations of very primary constitutional rights such as my freedom to chose my own work, to emigrate, to chose who I converse with, who'se opinions I hold in honour, and who I live near.

Not that maffia and control and sexual and child abuse, and whoredom and oppression and exploitation are new sucbjects, but why does the whole of thing run already so much different when one strays just a few meters over the border?

It was because of me? Well, I guess some, though possibly not at all enough practically, of my name is made enough again to take some lattitude, though not much, there are way to many assholes and bitches around (deliberate choice of still mild words) to help the nazi's who couldn't to power by betraying any honour goodness weakness and anything which s atop the average they can get their dirty hands or attention on. It may well be I've been in the continued attention and consciousness of certain childabusing families, the ones who wrape and torture little wonderfull jewish blondes who are so valuable for them to acumulate riches and whore money, but maybe even more to the illuminati when they can realy get to the life Jesus gives, and his prophets and apostles live in, and probably even more when leaders of the level of Clinton (and of course also probably still lesser deathforms which happen to become reelected as family affair to be powers that are) are in picture, systemwise, sociery wise, damnationwise, and in spirit.

Fuck the system? Sort of, I guess that is normal enough rock language, nothing special, except that the little boys may have permission to accept the house-holy-spirit (which isn't) but not the mick-jagger one, without permission, or going over a very wired proxy deamon...

I mean this world is screwed. Strong language again not be abusive, but because strong terminology is the only justified langiage. This stuff isn't subtle.So what happens when I go from one place to another and see or bump into or meet all kinds of non-characters (haven't seen a real character minus maybe a few for ages) in the meanwhile? Nothing much except many non-audibly or even in words uttered phrases and expressions (after filtering out the obvious demon stuff) like 'I'm not in that', or 'we may not be in that one' or another favorite 'and than nothing anymore' as refering to some alledged one time abusive situation.

What is that? Damnation, error, lies, the sinfull world without much brake or correction.

So become a nice and reasonable politician? And get no more than 4 persent projected votes because all the rest is crazy as a doorbell or a deluded nitwit or simply an evil mafioso which should have a criminal record from here to tokyo?

Why not be nice and reasonable in normal life. Goes the furthest usually I guess. But than one meets dutroux, or hitler, and suddenly one finds himself all aroused and appealed by so much sex appeal and charism? Oops, objection, withdrawn, but not stricken from the record and the jury will remember my point.

Pay attention son, and make some more solar cells, because you know after the next 30 rich years, almost an eternity of oil-less ones will come.

Nah, a bomb under the system. Christian favoritism and abuse of power destroyed, the maffia lines blown to pieces, the vatican under a nuke, sorry, got carried away again, the source of the optium for the people destroyed, free bread and games for everyone, vote for yourself, no shit everyone rich, the counterparty for you and for we? Nono, just the essence of the system destroyed.

What do you mean exactly?

That when official meeting of the grrrreat men who know and Exist and Have is so wonderfully organized with my taxmoney (and remember my balance in that way is at least reasonably speaking positive) they don't pray their brains out with childabuse circuits and let their spirits be filled with abuse, the stealing of faces and lives. So that their particularly interesting branch of mafia rise to the incredible stardom height of wellknownness and tv exposure and raw power to get every little boy on their spiritual pricks who they chose including that toooo wonderfull real holy and whory and virginal and capable one which they realy in all holyness want with that little spot of their dark heart which can try to get such feelings projected.

Or that along the clear and publicly hardly even disputed hard line of taking the lifes which seem fit for the purpose, taking them inside out and back again, vomiting the original owners of it out, taking the resulting stolen blood in it apart, and putting it back together with all taken faces one can get across in public as part of the impossible to beat eternally ulgy and utterly useless construction with seven heads they don't call neon god. And then think that is wonderfull

Oh yeah, and the thing speaks, too. Isn't it wonderfull how pigeons, home, sorry I meant how the whole of public life farts and resonates with hell and the worst thinkable miseries and destructiveness and hell which is so powerfull everyone wants it. And how demons actually exist! And realy make us all one in infinite shades of brown and deep black. When we want to. And otherwise other of course help us to want it for us. To become one and produce the wonderfull damnation for everyone in our great nation, so that all is sacrificed to the baal before any human life is realized in freedom, and that we are certain the holy spirit which isn't realy rules in all our children.

Ah. That. Doesn't work. They don't buy it anymore. I seem to have talked or thought them out of it. The nuts are the adults, not so much the children. Trying to pull the sort of sign, body or liptalk language on them adults seem to have sacrificed their lives to doesn't get you much more than 'sure', ignoration, or 'get our of here, nut' responses. Some good works after all.

What a damnation the world is in, I mean apart from this miserable country I probably condamned long ago without realizing much what my impact must have been, for not being Gods choosen workers in the whole of His creation from now to eternity as head of all nations, realy without errors and all having the wonderfull gift of a blubbermouthinh on and on holy spirit without even needing to discern who's born again and who isn't; erring and covering up for life-big mistakes as a rule of the thumb, instead of easily coming to some realisation of truth, and while they in fact try to operate at the level of abusiveness and nationwise oppression, abuse and sacrifice which is more akin to vietnam then even the moderately alledgedly civilized european nations.

Isn't the world istself so miserable it is rediculous to try to find the soul, personal, spiritual, emotional and rational freedom to contemplate workable forms of democracy? Isn't it all to miserable to let it live to begin with anyhow? No, I don't want to entertain such thoughts, and I always find the best remedy that already centuries ago, certain freedoms were fought for and officially obtained which are completely out of line with such thinking, so that easily proves that attempts to get free from that are completely worth while considering and giving place in practice. One just observes history and fact, and it is clear.

And no claim culture, satanist systematism, catholic faith and its violent advocates, anti christian trust selling logic, charming, sorcery and its social consequences on larger scale, damnation and bewitching schemes and associated mind-states has been able to stop that.

So no nazi-fear of 'in the end whe all end up in auschwitch anyhow', no fascist 'it is al gone die anyhow, so lets help it', no oppressed faith 'it has always been according to these ways' and no secret society 'you know that Certain Circuits Always Rule, don't you' is going to get to me making me a different thinker.

And no thought control is going to convince me differently. And I also happen to belief that the Christ who the bible speaks about as life of a kind which is holy and honorable and which is not related at all to child abuse, little and big whores and their mongers/keepers, and that the pope and te anti christ and their little lambs and he-goats have nothing to say about that of value.

So the system which forces and blackmails, mind controls, teaches and makes people into starting with robbing a valuable person of any dignity or ways if showing his or her artistry, sensitive intelligent, power and might and honour, let alone manhood, and let alone more mature sexuality, and oh horror in freedom and truth and being without any clear oaths to the satan and the heads of the ambitious mudstreams of the continents and their long term kindoms ideas, without the mercy to being with or to consider even to know about such things but look for what is worth it and which is genuinely good for something or pleasant or leading away from the damnation and ruling sins, that system which lets people become so miserable, braindead, mindless and prone to anything occult and nothing free, open, alive or good, that system must go.

Not forgetting that all of mankind by nature is inclined to evil, we can still as it seems have quite some influence on what rules and receives attention or counteraction.

Microtubules aren't going to kill you...

Even though every braincell probably has thousands of the little things which are involved in the cells actions, division and growing, and most probably how the brain responds and grows its structure.