Met through my ex-husband while they were going to college together in 1993.
Became best friends, watched movies, went motorcycling, walking, etc. together.
Ex-husband got girlfriend, Dark Knight said he wouldn't come around if ex and I didn't stop fighting. Girlfriend went bye-bye.
Dark Knight loses job and starts delivering pizza with me.
We discover just how much we have in common. We were spending 18-20 hrs a day with each other.
My Ashley dies and Dark Knight consoles me. We have our first kiss on a bridge over Red Deer River in the moonlight.
Ex finds out that we have feelings for each other and throws me out of suite I was paying for. Dark Knight is sent out of town.
After nearly 2 weeks in a hell of pain, Dark Knight comes back for me. We meet under the Dryad's tree on Sept. 16, 1995. We left town shortly after. We got married legally Dec. 20, 1996.
The things on this page are of my Dark Knight. Things that I wrote about him or remind me of him...
I feel like a vase that has been used and abused. I have at times had many nice things put into me. Sometimes there were not such nice things. Things like thorns and stinging nettles. There were times before you came along, that there was a mixture of pretty flowers and dark, poisoned water. Then I was emptied out and put on a shelf. I got dirtier and dirtier. Occasionally, someone would take me down, polish and admire a bit of my glass or sometimes try and make some more chips or cracks in me. Then you first came along - an insightful, loving and gentle man. You picked me up and began to polish all of me and admire me, cracks and all. Then there was a terrible fight when my original owner decided that he didn't want to sell me. I was smashed into a thousand bits as the police came to throw you out. My owner took one look and disgustedly slammed the door, leaving me lying broken and shattered on the filthy floor. Two weeks later, you came back and saw me lying there, pitiful and ruined. You carefully and gently gathered up all my pieces, dirt and all. You took me away and began to glue me back together. You filled my whole self with only the most beautiful of flowers and the purest, sweetest water. Then something happened! My simple glass turned into diamond! No when you allow others to see me or admire me, even if they are clumsy and end up dropping me, the magical diamond you turned me into with your love and attention can never be broken again.
Julie Keen '99
*I wrote this for Jared to try to explain how he had changed my life and my soul. Still doesn't explain it all... More than words can say...*
'92
*I wrote this way back when... before I met Jared but it was never true until after I did.*
So I walk another mile down this crooked road,
Clouds rolling in Lord it's getting cold,
Feeling fine, feelinf lost, feeling blue tonight,
But my only friend is Mr. Moonlight.
Then I see you, girl, lost in your book of poems,
You're in another world,
I should leave you alone.
My heart races on I try and hold it back,
But like a runaway train I'm about to jump the tracks...
Now you say you need a friend,
I swear to you if that's what you need,
That's what I'll be,
But I hope this never ends,
I feel there's something more the way,
You look at me...
And that's all I need to know,
I won't question why, don't need a reason,
We can take our time we can take it real slow,
When I see it in your eyes,
That's all I need to know...
Now we're talking 'bout angels that have lost their wings,
This melancholy world and the nature of things,
But then there's only silence when your eyes meet mine,
Sends a shiver to my soul runs deeper than time.
Reciting from your black book you were like some wounded bird.
I tried to catch your heart as it fell between your words.
You tore out one page and let it blow away,
Then you disappeared into your world,
It's a place I just can't stay...
You say you need a friend,
I swear to you if that's what you need,
That's what I'll be,
But I hope this never ends,
I feel there's something more the way you look at me...
All I need to know,
I won't question why, don't need a reason,
We can take our time we can take it real slow,
But it's right here in my heart,
That's all I need to know...
*This feels like a story. So many things that are talked about in this song are related to the things that happened with us. I can't explain it all to you. I guess you had to be there!*
When I left my home,
I was not much more than a child,
My mother started crying,
She knew that I was born to be wild...
'Cos I was looking for the bright lights,
In the big city, a red hot town,
Where the girls are pretty...
I took to the highway,
Chasing my dream down the line...
Hand in hand with trouble,
Never finding my peace of mind...
Cos I've been run out of towns,
So many times before,
I'm losing track of places,
Where I can't go back no more...
Outlaw...
born outside the law,
Just another outlaw,
a man on the run,
Will always take a chance for more...
I never find it easy,
Trying to keep the feeling alive...
I've always been a dreamer,
But, dreamers find it hard to survive...
When they're living in the bright lights,
Of the big city, a red hot town,
Where the girls are pretty...
Outlaw...
born outside the law,
Just another outlaw,
a man on the run,
Will always take a chance on more...
*Jared feels that this song really portrays him... especially the dreamer part. I can also relate since my personal theme song has been "Dreamer" by Supertramp for an awfully long time. (You know: Dreamer ...stupid little dreamer...) It is very true. Us dreamers find it very hard to survive in such a rough reality. People wonder why I like to read fantasy so much. It is because I prefer a happy ending, something that doesn't seem to happen often in this big, depressing world.*
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
"A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short."
Andre Maurois 'Memories'
I am yours, you are mine. Of this we are certain. You are lodged in my heart, the small key is lost. You must stay there forever.
Fran Ava
The night is closing, Where are you, The days are long, Where are you, (chorus)I lay, I bleed, The fire of God, Where are you, (chorus)
I see your face, Where are you, (chorus)
The pain inside of me...
*I know this is a REALLY sad song but it is some of what I felt when Jared was gone. Thank you, Lord, for filling the sea...*
THE PAIN INSIDE OF ME
Holy Soldier
Closing in on me.
I watch the sun,
Fall into the sea,
And I think of you and me...
When my tears are falling down?
Where are you?
You're not around...
The nights eternity.
I think of how it is,
And how it used to be,
When you were here with me...
When my tears are falling down?
Where are you?
Not around...
But you will never see,
I cry, I need,
I lay, I bleed,
But you will never see,
The pain inside of me...
A spark is all we need.
It's such a great divide,
But God can fill the sea.
Won't you come back to me?
When my tears are falling down?
Where are you?
Not around...
In my mind.
It haunts me through the day.
When I sleep,
You're in my dreams,
I just can't get away...
When my tears are falling down?
Where are you?
Not around...
The pain inside of me...
The pain...
The pain...
