When Two Lives Cross
Chapter Three: "One &#%@ crystal....how hard can it be?
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A traditional Japanese garden is always a thing for
the proud Japanese owner to behold. Large trees that
suggest shade placed at strategic positions all over the
backyard, gentle blooming flowers carelessly (or so it
seems) scattered everywhere, the common spring
fountain...everything denotes beauty and order in the
Japanese universe.
At the Tendo garden however, was another story. Dark clumps of bushes were tossed this way and that; any flowers that might have been present and growing beforehand had already been dug out and kicked to one side, as large holes dominated the garden ground, accentuated only by the forgotten shovels lying right next to them. In short, it was a pigsty.
Soun Tendo, who had never in his life expressed any special attachment to his demolished backyard, burst into tears. "My beautiful garden!" He wailed. It was amazing how a garden could change once a dozen or so people got their hands (and spades) on it.
"We're sorry." Genkai said apologetically. "But the Crystal must be found before it goes into the wrong hands. We'll do our best to clean it up afterwards."
Yuusuke and Kuwabara flinched at the thought of actually doing honest work. "All that digging for nothing." Kuwabara rasped in her husky female voice, which sent Soun once more into hysterics. An innocent gardening hose had accidentally been turned on (by whom, no one would admit), and Kuwabara and Hiei were among the recipients of the unforeseen bath.
"I guess it's not in the garden after all." Botan said with a small sigh.
"Plan B. We'll have to split up into teams." Genkai decided.
"Split up? For what?" Kurama asked, as he, Yukina and Ryouga rejoined the group.
Everyone began talking all at once.
"You see there's this Dimensional Crystal...."
"..who wants to take over the world...."
"...and it's Koenma's plan cause the gods...."
"...had to ruin my garden to hunt for..."
"....Akura, that's the demon's name and he...."
".....wanna know where the damn hot water is...."
"......any ideas?"
Kurama, Yukina and Ryouga opted to stare at them instead, more because they were unable to think of anything else to say.
Genkai rubbed her temples. "I'll brief you as soon as we split up. Okay, Ryouga, Kurama and Hiei, you three go north, Akane-san, take Yukina, Keiko, Shizuru and Botan with you and go left; Soun, Genma and Ranma will go south, and Nabiki, Kuwabara, Yuusuke and I will go right. Everyone got that?" She felt relief when everyone nodded. "Good. Koenma-sama will be coming here in an hour, so we'll meet back here at that time."
"What about him?" Nabiki asked, pointing. Everyone turned to see Kuno, who had somehow managed to douse himself with cold water and had become a twosome, and were now busy stalking female Kuwabara.
"H-h-eeeeeelllp." Kuwabara squeaked.
"Your shyness only inspires me to make you mine." The empty-headed poet proclaimed to her, cornering her against a tree, while the other began closing in as well. "Come date with me and I will shower you with words of love!" The latter declared.
"I'll bet." Kuwabara muttered.
Both Kunos lunged. Kuwabara, who was no slack in the speed department (despite any protest Hiei would make), ducked down low. Kuno number one and Kuno number two crashed into each other, their momentum causing them to crash once more against the tree. Kuwabara was up and running in a flash.
"Um." Yuusuke said, watching Kuwabara recede further into the distance. "Why don't we just leave him here, then when we come back, he'll hopefully be gone by then."
No one had any problems with that.
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Not far away.......
Shampoo was furious.
"Short dark hair girl will NO get my Ranma!" Shampoo snarled, even as she ran over a helpless jogger. Thoughts ran wild through her head. She could challenge her to an Amazon Tournament of Death, or she could get her to walk over hot coals or sharp wooden spikes, as stated in the Chinese Amazon Village Constitution, Article seventeen, section four, when an outside party tries to break an Amazon's engagement to his or her fiance / fiancee. However, she wasn't in the Amazon village at the moment; she wasn't even in China, so that law couldn't be effected.
She'd have to settle for killing her with her own bare hands.
She started pedaling even harder, furiously, running over small unimportant things like posts and trees and bikers and other people who were unfortunate enough to be in that general vicinity. Parking quickly in front of the Neko-Hanten, she marched up the stairs, ignoring Cologne, who was behind the counter, and Mousse, who rushed towards her with outstretched arms and somehow wound up hugging one of the customers instead, who then promptly dumped him with the iced tea she had been drinking.
*SPLOOSH* "You pervert!"
"....quack? Quack, quack!"
Waving aside Mousse's desperate attempt to
communicate with her in fowl language (no pun
intended), Cologne stared up the stairs, frowning.
< Wonder what's gotten into her? >
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"Ohohohohoho! So, she wants to steal my
darling Ranma away from me, doesn't she?"
Kodachi's insane laughter filled the air, even as
she carefully measured out a small dosage of green
liquid into a vial she was holding. The said liquid
bubbled, wavered between blue green and turquoise,
before finally settling down into a fizzing emerald.
"But destiny shall prevail! Soon, Ranma my
sweet, we will be together, you and me, your
intended bride!" With an evil squeal of
pleasure, she poured the contents of the vial into
an extra-large Johnnie Walker Classic vodka bottle,
newly bought from the wine shop just around the
corner. "For I, Kodachi Kuno, shall not
fail!" She paused dramatically, before finally
flitting out the window, bottle in hand, to the
accompanying music of clarinets and trombones, in
which evil and insane anime villains are wont to
hear just prior to grand exits.
***************************************************
Kuonji Ukyou stared hard at the okonomiyaki she was making, watching it fry into a crisp, golden brown. "Oh, my darling Ranchan.....why did you go and have yourself bewitched by that darkhaired strumpet?" Methodically, she flipped it up into the air with her spatula, then easily catching it in a takeout box.
But no matter. After all, she was the cutest, smartest, and sanest of all those competing for her Ranchan's affection; sooner or later he was bound to look her way.
She was just gonna give him a little push in her direction is all.
The okonomiyaki suitably wrapped, Ukyou smiled to herself. Her cooking was the best in all of Japan, and anyone would be happy to accept a delicious gift such as this...with a little secret ingredient, of course. Giggling to herslef, Ukyou turned to leave the Uuchan restaurant...to find herself face to face with a walking file cabinet.
"Uuuuchaaaaaan!"
"Get away from me, Tsubasa you pervert!"
Said file cabinet came scrambling out of Uuchan's,
accompanied by a sudden shower of spatulas, much to
the shock and amazement of those who were watching
nearby.
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"Where's my Shampoo?" Mousse demanded,
staring angrily at Cologne. Or what he thought was
Cologne. The real Cologne stood behind him, watching
idly as he argued with a footstool.
Since the opportunity, as well as his backside, presented itself to her, Cologne promptly whacked him on the derriere. "Is that the proper way to speak to your elders? And put on your glasses, I'm right over here." As Mousse let out a high-pitched yelp and started fumbling with his eyewear, she continued. "Shampoo's up in her room, and she seems to be looking for something, but on what, she wouldn't tell me." Probably a sure-fire scheme to get rid of the Tendo girl and marry Ranma, she had decided.
Mousse gave his glasses one final adjustment, then stood up straight. "I've been worried about her! She'd marched straight home without saying a thing, and looking angry enough to swing a cat!" Realizing that the girl in question could in fact, turned into the afforementioned feline, he quickly barrelled on: "And besides, what could she be doing up there? It's taking her a long time!"
But at that moment, Shampoo came stomping down the stairs, eyes gleaming and mouth curled in a feral grin. She seemed to be clutching something small in her hand. "I be out for awhile, great grandma!" She called, as she shoved Mousse out of the way and into the running sink, exiting and hopping onto her bike. The sudden screams and yelps heard outside marked her sudden departure.
"See? I told you she'll be fine." Cologne said smugly at Mousse, who was trying to shake off the rest of the water from his tail feathers.
"Quack."
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Botan looked left, then right. She scratched her head, screwed up her eyes and repeated the process all over again.
"Umm......Botan-san?" Yukina asked.
"Hai?"
"Ummm.....what are you doing?"
"I'm trying to SENSE it! I mean, you can only SENSE it if you have ki and it's within two miles of you, right? Well, that's what I'm doing now, trying to SENSE the Crystal."
The other girls sweatdropped.
"Why don't we just pick a certain area and start exploring there first." Shizuru offered helpfully.
"Oh. Good idea." Akane said, quickly steering them into the direction of the park. "So we look for um...something that's glowing, and all that stuff?"
"I don't even know if it's supposed to glow." Keiko admitted ruefully. "Besides, I don't know what I'm suppose to be doing here, I can't really sense ki."
"Oh, you will." Botan told her loyally. "I bet you can SENSE ki if you really tried."
"I can try." Keiko said, still sounding doubtful.
Shizuru rubbed her hands. "Well, let's start!"
The words were barely out of her mouth when out of nowhere, several shadows jumped down from nearby trees, surrounding them. Yukina cried out and drew back, Keiko wrapping one arm protectively around her. Shizuru automatically assumed a fighting stance, as did Akane. Botan quickly drew out an oar from hammerspace and readied herself, swinging it in front of her.
"Damn." Shizuru swore.
"They're too many!" Yukina exclaimed.
"They're too fast!" Keiko cried, as more and more shadows started popping out of the trees.
"They're too...." Botan's voice trailed off, as they found themselves staring at shadow-like chibi ninjas about half their size, and closely resembling the appearance of a Smurf. "...cute?"
"................."
"Um." Shizuru said faintly, trying hard not to laugh.
"What are you waiting for? Fight us!" demanded one of the shadow-ninjas, in a voice that sounded suspiciously like Bart Simpson's.
Akane started to giggle, then Botan, then Yukina, then Keiko, then finally Shizuru. "Y-y-you're too kawaii to fight with!" Akane nearly choked on her laughter.
"Oh, really?" Another chibi stomped his feet. "Well, it's your loss. Attack!" He started to run towards them, as the other chibis began to follow suit........
Several minutes later...........
"I didn't hurt them too hard, did I?" Botan asked worriedly.
"A bit." Akane admitted.
"Gomen, I get a bit carried away in stuff like this."
Gingerly, Keiko poked at one of the fallen chibi ninjas. It moaned, but did not move.
"I uh, think they'll be alright."
"You sure?"
"Uh huh."
"This is the last one." Yukina reported, looking up from the ninja she had just healed. "They'll be fine and they'll wake up in a couple of hours."
"This is the weirdest fight I've ever been in." Shizuru said, making a small face. "I pity those cute lil guys. Oh well, we'll have to start searching again, I guess."
"Maybe somewhere far away from the park?" Keiko suggested. "I don't feel like explaining to people why we're standing in the middle of a mountain of little Shaolins."
"What's a Shaolin?" Yukina asked, puzzled.
"I'll explain it to you later, Yukina-chan."
"By the way, Yukina-chan....." Akane began. "How did you do that? The healing thing, I mean. And the ice freezing-popsicle-jamboree thing you did to the one Botan was trying to use as a baseball."
"Oh. Well, I'm a Koorime!"
"A what?"
"Well, you see......."
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"It's a beautiful day today, isn't it Genma
old boy?" Soun asked the tall, hulking panda
right next to him.
Said panda held up a signboard. Indeed it is, Soun.
"Where do you think we should we go to look for that Crystal whatisthingy?"
I have no idea. Why not enjoy the scenery for awhile?
"I had to get stuck with the both of you." Ranma muttered darkly, kicking at a pebble. He would have been better off looking for the stupid crystal by himself too, not with Tweedledum and Tweedledee tagging along. He passed a sign and blinked. He hadn't noticed that they were heading for the school. From a distance, he could see a sudden explosion of balloons and confetti.
< Uh oh. Old man Kuno's up to his old tricks again. >
A sudden blast of the speakers made them stop. "Yo, all dem girls and boys! Dis is yer Principal Kuno speaking! 'm passing dem new school code, dat all students should have de new haircut! "
"Heeeereeee we go again...."
"....all bald! Starting today!" The sudden noise of buzzers being turned on nearly drowned out the screams as students started to look frantically around for a place to hide.
"Doh. Yo, Soun, Pop, you two go ahead, willya? I gotta teach Kuno another lesson again."
"Hmm? Oh, by all means, by all means boy. Genma and I can handle ourselves from here."
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"Anything yet?" Yuusuke asked Kuwabara.
Genkai had gone ahead, mumbling something about
strong psychic auras, towards the direction of the
mountains. Along with Nabiki, they had decided that
one of the places they must absolutely stop by to
check for the missing Crystal was the nearest ice
cream shop (which by the way served a hundred and
one different ice cream flavors, ranging from plain
vanilla to mocca fudge to tiramisu). Nabiki knew
what the boys were up to, she'd seen Ranma play
hooky too many times not to figure them out, but she
didn't mind much.....as long as THEY were paying.
Having exhausted the possibilities of every hiding place and corner of the little shop (as well as most of the flavors), they pondered on their next destination.
"Maybe the video arcade?" Kuwabara asked hopefully. Yuusuke had beaten her in Sailormoon the last time they were in one, and she was itching for a rematch. It was in her personal opinion that Sailorchibimoon kicks ass over any of her sailor counterparts any day of the week.
"Well..." Yuusuke's eyes brightened as he considered the idea. Nabiki shook her head, added another item to her mental list of ways to con silly adolescents out of their money, and took a last bite out of her chunky chocolate sundae.
"What about..." Yuusuke began, but was suddenly interrupted as the parlor's door swung open with a loud crash.
"WHERE IS MY FAIR CARROT-HAIRED MAIDEN?" A familiar voice boomed.
"Ohhhh nooo..." Kuwabara slid further down her seat. "I knew I should've looked for hot water while I still had the time."
"That headlong crash into the tree should have left him unconscious for at least another hour more." Nabiki remarked.
"MY LOVE!" Another Kuno wedged through beside the original Kuno . Kuwabara watched in horror as *another* Kuno squeezed in between the other two, and in unison, began racing towards the counter they were sitting on.
All three skidded into a stop upon seeing Yuusuke. "What??" The first Kuno (or was it the second?) roared. "Who is this man who has the audacity to sit beside MY beloved? Only I am granted such a right!"
"Swell." Yuusuke muttered. "Now he thinks I'm your boyfriend."
"I challenge thee to a fight!" The last Kuno butted in, raising his bokken and waving it around like a homicidal maniac.
Yuusuke spread his hands, palms outward. "Look here. I'm *not* he's...I mean, her boyfriend. She's not even a she, she's a he. Court her, date her, marry her, I don't really care."
"Urameshi!" Kuwabara threatened.
"Ah, so now you quiver upon facing me? Bow down and fight me like a man, knave!"
As people began to slowly edge out of the parlor, the three Kunos began lashing at Yuusuke with their bokkens, all of which Yuusuke easily avoided. Irate, they all leaped high into the air and bore down on him with hoarse battle cries.
Yuusuke nimbly stepped to one side. All the Kunos flew past him, landing with a crash into the fudge making machine, sending shards and bits of machinery flying as well.
"HA!" Yuusuke smirked, turning away from them to see Kuwabara and Nabiki, the former glaring at him, the latter snatching a free cone while the owner was preoccupied with salvaging his equipments and threatening all Kuno triplets with lawsuits.
That was the last thing he remembered, as
something suddenly struck him from behind and the
world went black.
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Hiei watched Kurama out of the corner of her eye.
Her best friend staunchly refused to meet her gaze,
concentrating instead on his surroundings, though
Hiei doubted that he was really looking for the damn
Crystal, whatever it was supposed to do.
Hiei rarely allowed himself to show and feel emotion, but deep within her mind, she couldn't help but feel confused and a little curious. Normally, it was Kurama who usually tried to coax him into conversation, as was his way, but today was an exception. Ever since the Juusenkyo incident, he felt that Kurama was doing his best to avoid him, even. And why should he be sulking? Hiei was the one who had to suffer a female body, not him.
"What is it?" She finally asked.
"What's what?" Kurama mumbled.
"You. You've been acting strange ever since we went on this "trip", s Genkai wants to put it. You've barely said five words to me, and when I ask you say that there's nothing wrong. You can't lie to a master liar." Hiei said, in what had to be the longest monologue that she remembers saying. There. Kurama would open up, it'll be her turn to shut up, and the world will start turning again.
"I told you, like I said before, nothing's wrong." Kurama said evasively, avoiding her eyes once more.
Hiei let out a noise that sounded suspiciously like a sigh, then disappeared from view, to hop onto a nearby branch. Fine. If Kurama didn't want to talk, then she wouldn't either.
But just then, a sudden scatter of rose petals surrounded the area, and a young girl flew - that was the only way Hiei could describe it - into view. She wore a leotard, and was carrying a bottle of some sort in one of her hands. "Ohohohohohohohohohohohoho!"
Kurama blinked and turned. The girl thrusted the bottle onto his hands. "You're a friend of that cute little dark haired Hiei, aren't you?"
"Uh...yes." Kurama said, disconcerted.
"Ohohohohohohohohoho!" If she didn't stop that hideous warbling, Hiei decided that she might be tempted to cut out her tongue. "Then please give this gift to Hiei, courtesy of the one and only..." A dramatic pause. "Kodachi Kuno!" With another showering of petals and raucous laughter, she blurred out of view.
Hiei blinked. A strange girl giving her gifts? Was it one of the strange human customs she had seen, like the "birthdays" Kurama kept on telling her about? But it wasn't her birthday, she didn't even know when her birthday was.
"Hiei? Care to explain this?" There was an odd note to Kurama's voice.
"How should I know?" Hiei snorted. He was about to argue further, when another girl, this time carrying some strange sort of box, began waltzing over to Kurama.
"Oh, miss! You're one of those staying at the Kamiya Dojo, right?"
"Hai...but I'm not a gi-"
"Great! Do me a favor and deliver this to Hiei-chan, would you? Consider it a gift from the Uuchan restaurant not far from here!" With a grin and a sly wink, the girl pranced away, leaving an open mouthed Kurama staring after her.
Hiei stared as well. What were all those stupid ningen women doing, ganging up on her? Then he realized to his horror, that yet *another* girl was pedaling up to them on a strange thing with round circles attached to them.
"Special delivery fom Nekohanten!" The purple haired girl called cheerily, tossing a shiny object towards Kurama, who easily caught it. "To the black cloak Hiei!" With a wave and a nasty smile, she veered off onto a corner and vanished from view.
".....Hiei?"
"I didn't do anything!" Hiei snarled, hopping off the tree to face Kurama.
"Oh, really?" Kurama's voice was strangely even. Hiei had been around Kurama long enough to know that he was angry. "Well, I don't think all these girls would trip themselves all over you just because you didn't do *anything*." He shook the packages to emphasize his point.
"Listen," Hiei growled. "You know me better than that. Do I really look like the kind who'd WANT some stupid girls to chase after me?"
Kurama glared at her, then his eyes softened a little. "Yeah...I guess you're right. Gomen ne, Hiei." He sighed.
Hiei opened her mouth, thought better of it, then closed it again. She was clearly puzzled. What was wrong with Kurama? This seemed more serious than she had thought. "Let's just go back to the dojo." She finally said. "The others might have some good news."
Kurama nodded, but didn't answer. As the two
headed back to the Tendo residence in silence, Hiei
couldn't help but think that they were missing
somebody.
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Ryouga was miserable.
"Umm....Kurama-san?" He looked around. No Kurama in sight. No sign of the dark haired girl (or guy, whatever), either. He was lost.
Again.
With a little sigh of despair, Ryouga began
walking to what he hoped was the right direction,
wondering if there was a pay phone nearby who would
accept collect calls.
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"It's HERE! It's actually HERE! I actually
found it!!" Botan's voice rose several octaves,
increasing steadily in volume and pitch after every
other syllable.
"Pipe down!" Shizuru hissed, scrambling over to where Botan and the others were at. Peering down beside them, she spotted the small golden chest, partly hidden by the dirt and grime.....and gasped. Whatever was inside, had strong ki, immense power. Her mind recoiled from probing further.
"It's so strong!" Keiko whispered. "I can even sense it."
Yukina moved to reach out for the chest, then stopped. "Didn't Koenma-sama say that we shouldn't be touching it?" She said softly. "How are we going to carry it back?"
"She said it was the Crystal." Keiko reminded her. "I think it's alright to touch its container."
"I don't want to take that chance if I were you." Shizuru said.
"Well..." Akane shrugged, reached down and tugged at the latch.
"Are you CRAZY?!" Botan half shrieked.
"SSSSHHHHHHH."
"Sorry."
"I touched it, and I can still feel my hand." Akane said. "I think it's safe.
It took the combined strength of the girls to lift the chest, then drag it several feet from where it first originally lay. They paused for breath.
"We can't....carry it....this way." Keiko panted. "It's too...heavy and the....dojo's...too far!"
Shizuru thought for a moment, her eyes traveling first from the chest towards the ground, then at Yukina's sandals (now looking dirty) to Keiko's new set of Addidas to Botan's oar.....
Botan's oar. Hmmm.
She grabbed it. Botan let out a muffled squeak.
"We could use this!" She said cheerfully. "We could drag the chest on it first, then Botan could use the oar to carry it all the way back."
"Oh, good idea!" Yukina said, pleased.
"But my oar'd get all dirty!" Botan wailed.
"It's just an oar, Botan. We'll clean it up when we get to the Tendo Dojo."
"But it's still MY oar! It's the principle of the thing!"
As the girls argued among themselves, then finally set the chest onto the steering utility despite Botan's protests, they failed to notice a hooded figure watching not far away, hidden bt the tall grass.
"Tendo Dojo." It said softly, the words
lingering onto its tongue like a mantra.
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