Jokes!
If computer error messages were haikus:
First snow, then silence.
This thousand dollar screen dies
so beautifully.
With searching comes loss
and the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found.
Three things are certain:
death, taxes, and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.
A file that big?
It might be very useful,
but now it is gone.
Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.
Errors have occurred.
We won't tell you where or why.
Lazy programmers.
The code was willing.
It considered your request,
but the chips were weak.
Printer not ready.
Could be a fatal error.
Have a pen handy?
This site has been moved.
We'd tell you where, but then we'd
have to delete you.
ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have.
You ask way too much.
The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist.
A crash reduces
your expensive computer
to a simple stone.
Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.
Having been erased,
the document you're seeking
must now be retyped.
Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
It's wise to remember how easily email -- this wonderful
technology -- can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with
serious consequences.
Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-
filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife
was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the
next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his
wife a quick email.
Unfortunately, when typing her address, he missed one letter,
and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's
wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When
the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at
the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor
in a dead faint.
At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this
note on the screen:
Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival
tomorrow.
P.S. Sure is hot down here.
