THINGS ADMISSIONS NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT COLLEGE 
 
 1. Quarters are like gold. 
 2. Two meals a day is standard. 
 3. Road trip whenever possible. 
 4. Going to the mailbox was never an ego booster/breaker before. 
 5. You will begin to nap again. 
 6. Your bookstore bill will almost equal tuition. 
 7. Squirt guns = Stress relief. 
 8. E-mail becomes your second language. 
 9. College students throw paper airplanes too. 
 10. You never realized so many people were smarter than you. 
 11. Western Europe could be wiped out by a horrible plague and you wouldn't know, but 
you can recite last week's re-run of the Simpson's verbatim. 
 12. You will never rent more movies in your life. 
 13. No one is too old for video games. 
 14. The health service nurses are there because they couldn't make it at a real hospital. 
Never, ever forget that. 
 15. Care packages are right up there with birthdays. (hint hint!) 
 16. Campus is only clean for family weekend and freshman orientation. 
 17. It never sucked so much to get sick. 
 18. Nothing you want to register for will be open. 
 19. Beware of the freshman 15!!! 
 20. Be creative in the dining hall... 
 21. Classes... the later the better. 
 22. You are no longer thankful that the fire alarms are here to protect you. 
 23. Disney movies are more than just classics. 
 24. Asleep by 2:30 am is an early night. 
 25. Cereal makes a meal any time of the day. 
 26. New additions to food groups: beer, ramen, and pizza. 
 27. ATM's are the devils advocate. ATM=Another Twenty Missing. 
 28. Duct tape heals all wounds. 
 29. If they say you can't have it in your dorm, they are just kidding. 
 30. Keys have never been so important, yet you seem to lose them even more. 
 31. Showers become less important, sleep become smore important. 
 32. You will eat anywhere that is a buffet. 
 33. You realize college is the ideal lifestyle, except for those pesky classes. 
 34. Procrastination is an art form. 
 35. Jeans may be worn as many times as the wearer desires. 
 36. The only time to dress up is when your jeans are dirty. 
 37. You'll eat anything that's free. 
 38. College football is the coolest thing on the planet. 
 39. Cartoons are for all ages, especially Scooby Doo. 
 40. You are never alone. 
 41. SNOOD is more addicting than pot 
 42. Thanks to Napster, you will never listen to one of your CDs ever again 
 43. Those ugly cinder blocks are not sound proof 
 44. You will come to hate at least one person in your hall with a passion 
 45. Stealing from the dining hall will become second nature 
 46. If it's snowing out- the only reason you will leave your room is for food or alcohol 
 47. Instant messenger becomes an addiction 
 48. Dishes smell after days of piling up 
 49. No matter how nice you are, some people just won't smile back- get used to it. 
 50. Pictures, posters, emails or anything else to cover the ugly cell we live in will be 
transformed into wallpaper