Today I am bitter...
So I am warning you. This is petty stuff..some of it not even closely related to Real Problems, but it was just a bad week and I feel like spewing, and it is MY journal, so I shall. "The cheerleaders" part I can have half a sense of humor about. The affair that ruined one of our favorite couples - I have nothing funny to say about that.
Cheerleading season....yes, I am almost done, I couldn't be more thrilled about that.
This has been a tough year. The 8th grade girls are those talented ones who were chatty but sweet last year. This year they are IN EIGHTH GRADE. And that says it all. Now before you go reminding me that I love Jr. High girls, and understand their insecurities and recognize their need to get on with their teens, and before you remind me they are just being EIGHTH GRADERS, and that I was miserable myself in EIGHTH GRADE, I know all that and I am going to complain about them anyway. Because I am very tired of understanding them. YOU can do that, I am going to complain.
Let's see….first there is the constant chatter, the goofing around and the fact that they can never practice straight through on something. They know they are good, but honestly they are NOT good right now because good or not, you need to have discipline and practice to get timing down, and to be crisp and clean. They are capable of that, but they choose to fall short of that. So keep that in the back of your mind. Did I say constant? Did I say every night, the same thing?
Okay, now factor in my niece and her friend waltzing in a half hour late to an hour practice the day before the pep rally. Big meanie Understands-But-Doesn't-Give-a-Damn benched them for the pep rally. Hey, don't flutter your gooed up eyelashes at ME, they missed the practice of the dance, so as far as I am concerned they weren't doing the dance in front of the whole school. I smiled UNDERSTANDINGLY when I said it..in my "gee I regret you made that choice" smile. The DREADED, "Gee, I regret you made the choice to skip practice and walk downtown with your boyfriend holding hands on the avenue in front of 4 people who told me they saw you" smile.
Oh, and run some laps while you are at it. Quit the chatter!
It is the niece's friend who is the biggest PIMA (pain in my..). Always scheming like the Daddy-spoiled middle child that she is….I understand, really I do. Quit the incessant chatter!
Another time, she showed up at a practice and smiled sweetly at our generous gymnastics coach who VOLUNTEERED to work with my girls and told her loudly her mother didn't allow her to do any gymnastics because she (Gym Coach) should have gotten signed permission slips first. Poor GC looked at me with this bewildered look on her face so that I went to see what this was about. (She didn't come to her COACH with this, no, she went to our wonderful volunteer.) SO I told her, that was fine, but no gym practice means no stunting in the games. AND I sat and BANGED out a permission slip, told the girls I was under no obligation to have one, as I have the right as a coach to bring in professionals to help them, their regular sports releases covered all that, BUT that if it would make parents feel better to have a signed slip, they could indeed sign one for me, and not to plan on practicing without one from now on. Three missed practices equals one benched PIMA.
Then, when I saw Mommy that night I sweetly explained…she looked as bewildered as the GC had earlier. NO, she hadn't said that…what SHE said when Queen Mouth dramatized it at home was, "Oh dearest, if it were something that dangerous, and if they were expecting you to do things you are neither capable of or trained to do, they would have to have all kinds of releases and insurances…I am sure whatever they are asking of you is just fine."
From that rational explanation Mouth translated, "I am sorry, I am not allowed to do gymnastics for you because my mother said YOU should have gotten signed permission slips, first."
The only one that didn't have a signed slip at the next practice was Queen Mouth.
Injuries are the new thing. First, one of my B squad girls ended up on crutches from a night that a substitute was with them for a girls game, while I took A Squad to an away boys game. No report of injury, no limping, but the next day she was on crutches, and couldn't practice (sorry no game). But meanwhile, QM perked right up! Crutches!!!! How neat!!! We have some of those babies lying around the house!
She was so "injured" the next game (her knee "just popped!") that she had to leave the gym and go out and have some guy get her some ice (never told me anything...left the gym, walking just fine). Now, her squad was done with its dances, lifts, and all other excitement…down to just bench chants and Incessant Chatter while B squad cheered. How boring! Where is the attention in THAT??? Anyway, she returned from her "drink of water" holding a Ziploc full of ice. She put her leg up for the entire world to notice with its big fat leaking ice bag and her loud CHATTER about how uncomfortable it was to sit with your leg up like that. (I couldn't hear her, my hears don't pick up that faked injury channel.)
Later that night, she came to the Sr. High's banquet on crutches. Never saw a Dr., mind you. But she dusted off those crutches and managed to hobble all over the place on them. She drove the Sr. High cheerleaders nuts with her loud grunts to come clear across the room to ask them for a piece of gum and hobble back again.
Twice.
So, because I understand 8th grade CHATTERERS, I looked for the gain in all this drama….. BINGO! She wanted to be off the next girls' game, since the boys weren't playing and would be AT the girls' game as spectators. She would be able to sit and hold hands with her boyfriend!!
On crutches.
ON the top bleacher.
Needing all sorts of things including leaky ice from the concession.
Funny, our rules say injured girls sit with squad and cheer with the bench...so she couldn't do that. She TRIED, but I made her join the squad...at which point she stomped out of gym in front of all the parents and friends, (no crutches, it was much better this evening) and sicked her father on me. He had just come in and was upset to see Itsy Bitsy all in a dither. He was a little testy when he confronted me ….again in front of a whole grandstand. My, but we are nothing if not theatrical! By the time I finished patiently explaining to this exmilitary man, who thinks his daughter is Annie Sunshine, all about the rules that she signed, etc, I was thoroughly drained. He started with how she has been taught to walk away if she has been angered, and I angered HER when I yelled at her, so she was out in the hallway walking it off. I told him politely that 1) it was her choice to do that and that was fine, but if she walked a-way out the gym door (which she did) she violated the rules, and wouldn't be cheering the next game. And 2) I didn't "YELL" at her, but made eye contact WHILE SHE WAS HOLDING HANDS WITH RYAN (said oh so sweetly and nonchalantly knowing how dads feel about daughter's holding hand with boys) and motioned to her with my hands only, for her to come join us. I asked politely if he needed to see a copy of our rules about that.
Hey, I have BEEN an 8th grader, I can still play that game if I have to….bwaa hah hah! I think in the end he was embarrassed, but for a minute there I was just NO GOOD!
She missed her chance to do the showy dances and everything, and "that just bites" I think is how she put it. So she was back good as new (still never saw a Dr) the next game. Told her I needed to see that the knee would hold through regular cheers, no roundoffs or lifts or dance until I could tell the knee would be okay, so she missed another chance to be showing off….er cheering. Luckily for her, her mouth hadn't "just popped" so she was still able to ….CHATTER.
The next game, she was back in full, and we started out fine. I am very good at not holding grudges once I get my way. BUT again, as soon as her squad was done with the tricks, and she was to just cheer on the sidelines, oh she started up little things to get at Miss Lyra….like change the words to our cheers w/o asking, (why do they all do what she commands?) Change her captain night with someone else because she had Novocain sometime during the day (puh-lease, it didn't stop her from yakking, flirting, kissing or cheering, but I guess it affected her brain too much to choose the bench chants). I am about ready to sccccrrream with this one girl.
And that is just one of them. Now the others aren't that difficult, but they ain't easy either. Thankfully my B squad...who isn't very good...is very nice and all of them try really hard! They don't get enough of my time and none of my patience and sweetness as they have to listen to me all practice long doing my banshee imitation for A Squad's benefit.
2 more games, and Drama Queen and the other P.I.M.A's belong to Sandy (Lydia's coach). YEAH!!!
So, because I am a nice coach and my B squad deserves it, I am staying all night in a gym with this bunch for a lock in. I can be in denial about that until I get back from Mexico. :)
Whine, whine, I know. They may be small things but they build up, one straw at a time... Oh, by the way, they look good and I get a lot of compliments on their behalf which I take and give to them,....begrudgingly. ;)
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Update as it was written on a message board:
My "nasty" away basketball trip last night, had more to do with cheerleaders than with weather, although we DID have whiteout conditions in a few places and we did smash into a deer with the school bus. I was more worried about the bus driver slamming on her brakes on "less than dry" roads than I was about hitting a deer, I will have to admit.
No, the nastiness has to do with cheerleaders who at the ripe old age of 14 now know everything and do not need a coach to tell them what to do, so therefore have dismissed her. She shows up of course, but they don't mind, they just ignore her and think if they treat her as if she is invisible, maybe she will make like a bee and buzz off. Meanwhile, they make up what they want to do and do it in front of their entire audience, so everyone has a chance to know that they don't need no coach.
Did you know that a million laps for girls who were on the cross country team is fun, not punishment?
They also help the 7th grade "B Squad" to look like idiots while they are cheering…undermining everything they do, so that everyone will know that they, A Squad, are indeed better, and can be the ones to tell B Squad what to do, and not worry about having a coach for them either.
They don't even have to follow bus rules, because they are THE CHEERLEADERS.
I suspended two of the hoity-toities tonight...after we turned on the bus lights and found them shacked up with the boys in the back of the bus. Neither of them was Queen Mouth, by the way.
Too bad one of them WAS my niece.
Aren't you glad you asked? Oh, that's right YOU DIDN'T!
Meanwhile at school, one of my eight year olds, who has not yet learned to read, stayed home 2 days last week to run before a wrestling match so he could lose weight and wrestle down a class. This was after a few days of groaning loudly, whining, putting his head down, and nearly passing out in school because he wasn't eating to make weight. Then this week he was off on Thursday AND Friday because he is going away somewhere to compete, and had to make weight again. Care to comment on that? Let me tell you that he is seeded second for this across the state tournament to add to your information bank before you form an opinion. Yes, wrestling gives him something to do with all his energy..rather than punch girls in the nose on the bus like his younger brother. But, skipping meals and skipping school to run (couldn't he do that AFTER school???) I just don't get it. All during this time he hasn't read a single story for homework, and is failing reading. I don't think that would have fit MY parenting style… I have to wonder why we have tournaments that 7-9 year olds can compete in on school days anyway. Or beauty pageants, or basketball games, or anything else you can compete in on that age level. And if we ARE going to have them, why is it that elementary kids don't have to be holding down a certain GPA to participate when high school kids do have to. (Yes, I realize that the real answer is that this is not a school-sponsored event.) This boy's attitude stinks toward anything related to "school work" (loud protests if he has to hold a pencil). I can't motivate him on my own, when at home all the concentration is on skipping homework to wrestle. The high school has a chance to say, "education first, sports second" to both students and parents, but I don't. (We won't even get into schools who fix grades, etc so kids can compete without making the grade, that is another whole topic.) I haven't totally formed my own opinion. I am really proud of this boy's wrestling and will welcome the trophy he brings home….but I am really MUCH more concerned about his education, and I wish I felt that was going to be addressed on his behalff. Therein lies my conflict.
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