by Asia
the sun rose high in the blue naked sky,
the dry land not offering a piece of shade, not to mention a place to hide,
as she run through the desert, her feet burning from the heat of the sand.
'faster, faster, faster...' her mind was playing, she tried to run faster through the deep dune, but fell flat on her face.
frantically, she tried to get up, but her body betrayed her.
horrified she tried to get up once more, but it seems as if she just couldn't move a muscle, her heart sank as felt a shade in front of her.
she leaped as she felt hands helping her up gently but firmly.
as she stood up, she looked up on the figure in front of her.
she saw only his eyes.
"a life for a life" he said in a deep voice, he talked in a strange language.
she looked at him ,puzzled, when she realized she understood his language, yet she couldn't understand his meaning.
she wanted to ask him what did he want to tell her, but he explained before she could even ask.
"you will save my body, and I will save your soul", and with that, he turned around and walked away.
"wait, don't go, don't leave me here..." she cried, "don't leave me alone"...
she woke up with a start.
"are you all right, honey?" she heard a familiar voice.
"yes, I'm fine, thank you, you can go back to sleep"
"don't you want to talk about your dream?"
she was not surprised, Nanny always knew how she felt.
"it was that dream again..."
"which one?"
"it was both" she answered "I ran in the desert this time, it was so hot I couldn't breath, and I fell, and then he came"
"who came?" Nanny asked, though she knew the answer, "did you see him?"
"no" she said sadly, "but he talked to me, it was so weird, he talked in a strange language but I understood him..."
they talked some more, until Nanny gave her a kiss on her forehead "you should get some sleep, darling, tomorrow would be a long day".
she tried to sleep, but it eluded her, so she went to her favorite place, the branch near her window and looked at the horizon, waiting for dawn.
'tomorrow indeed would be a long day' she thought to herself.
she clench her emerald necklace, "oh, mom, I hope you would watch at me today, I hope everything will be alright",
but she had a growing feeling it wouldn't be.
she felt a chill, and knew this day would change everything, she had good instinct, and she learned to trust them.
she felt restless and decided to arrange everything for the morning, maybe it would calm her a little bit.
as she turned to her closet, she almost slipped, "sorry brandy, I forgot this was your new bed.", she smiled at her dogs laying curled up together.
remembering the day she got brandy, her smile faded .it was the last day of her childhood.
her father got on the carriage and motioned the coachman to go on.
"how big is the market, dad?, is it bigger then the farm?"
"no sweetie, but it's almost as big as our house." he answered
"so it's not that big" she said, a little bit disappointed.
"well, it's the biggest market in the city, and it's full of things, they sell everything there, even dogs..." he said with a smile.
"oh, am I getting a dog?" she asked, full of excitement ,"oh, dad" she gave him a big hug.
the ride went on and she start singing, full of happiness.
when they got to the market they went straight to the dogs section.
they were there almost an hour until she managed to choose one from the big bunch of puppies, she chose the happiest puppy, a female irish setter.
"how are you going to call her?" the seller asked.
"I don't know, I never thought about it, how did you call her ?"
"we called her Brandy."
she didn't know what brandy mean, but it sounded nice. "Brandy..." the puppy barked, "she knows it's her name" she laughed.
"well, Brandy it is." said her father, "now lets go, we have a lot to do today."
they went on until they reached the center of the market. she saw a few men standing in the clearing, they were all looked dirty and worn out, and chained.
"who are they?" she asked her father.
she was answered with a short answer "they are slaves"
her still child mind didn't fully understand the answer, until she saw her father take a whip and start to hit their back, trying to measure up their strength.
she couldn't bear seeing it and run away crying.
they found her after a day of searching, on a tree in the woods hugging her puppy, but she wouldn't come down, only when her mother came they managed to get her down.
this was the day her father changed from an angel to a devil.
from this day on she never called him father, she didn't talk to him unless he asked her.
after a few weeks her mother got very ill, and died after a month of suffering.
it was hard even more when her father married again. not that Margaret was evil like a step mother in the legends, she did try a lot to get closer. she became a friend after a few years, but was never a replace for her beloved mother.
her father was the one that took all the pictures of Lily off the walls, and destroyed every memory of her mother.
all she had was the emerald necklace her mother gave her.
as the fluid of memories washed her she sat down on her bed trying to compose herself, then she decided to take a quick bath, it would calm her down.
when she walked out of the bathroom, obviously feeling better, she turned to look at the mirror.
her white skin was shining from the wash, her damp blond hair falling on her back, if she wouldn't hurry and brush it, it would get all curl up, and she could never make it the way she wanted her hair today.
most of the time she just let it dry off, but today was a big day she would have to make a braid, she wanted to look more mature.
she looked like a little girl with her baby face, and her green dazzling eyes always looking in curiosity at her surrounding.
she wasn't tall and a little bit skinny, though she had muscles from playing around and climbing trees, she hated all the girls play and hang out with the boys in the farm.
and after Brandy came they just run all day long, Brandy had a lot of energy when she was young, but now she was 9 years old, and it was old.
it was kind of strange, she thought, that Brandy never got pregnant.
they have a lot of male dogs in the farm, and brandy did got into heat, but she never had puppies. well she had Gracey, but it didn't really count, though she treated her like her own puppy.
one day Brandy just disappeared, leaving her owner crazy from worry, she returned after a couple of days, with a little puppy trailing around her. she immediately fallen in love with the small cub.
they went to the vet to check her out, he was so surprised to see that it was not a dog, it was a wolf.
but she wouldn't give it away, she called her Grace because she walked with such a grace moves.
her thread of thought was cut off when she heard a knock on the door.
"good morning Emerald, are you coming?"
"I'll be down in a second"
"good luck today"
"thank you Margaret" she didn't tell her what she thought of this day.
Emerald knew that no matter what happens, it wouldn't be good, no matter from what side she looked at it.
*****
she was running through the fields laughing, her hair waving in the wind, the laughter was so sweet, he knew this laughter.
he wanted to run with her, to laugh with her, suddenly the laughter stop, and he could feel the fear in the air, he heard her crying for help, without thinking he run to her but as he got near she disappeared.
but her crying for help still hang in the air.
he woke up full of cold sweat .
he tried to go back to sleep, but just couldn't. all he could think about was her.
i should have run faster. he blame himself at her disappearing.
when the thought of her became to much, he decided to go out, he needed the fresh air desperately.
he walked a few paces, but the thought laid heavy on his head, so he sat down on a big rock, he was so profound in his thought he didn't heard that someone was coming.
"Joharran, is everything all right?"
he looked up at the blue gray eyes, he wanted to say that everything was fine, but knew he couldn't lie, not to her.
"no".
Ayla sat down next to him and waited.
"well" he started "I have this dreams for a few moon cycles. I see a young woman" he stopped for a moment, trying to find a way to say it without sounding stupid.
Joharran was not a spiritual man, he never even remembered his dreams, this was a new situation for him.
"I dream of her every night, it's like I know everything about her, she have the most beautiful laugh I have ever heard."
"but today was different," he still felt goose bumps thinking about it "I felt her fear, and she was crying for help, I ran for her, but I didn't make it on time, she was gone, and I couldn't save her".
"did you notice anything different except this?" Ayla asked, trying to get more details.
"well, those dreams were always different, but I do remember she was running in a meadow, but it looked strange, there was just too much order, all the grain was in a parallel rows, it was so unnatural.
and her clothes was weird too."
as he told her, Ayla realized it was the reason why he never had a mate, the girl in his dreams was his destiny, she knew it, but he had to find out alone, she couldn't help him, but maybe she could guide him.
"what do you think of it, Joharran?"
"I don't know, I want to help her but I don't know how." he said desperately.
"well, lets think of a way to find her"
he was surprised she understood him, "do you think the dreams have meaning?"
Ayla couldn't lie to him, "yes, I think it has".
"what do you think I should do?" he never asked guidance from anyone in his life, but the spirit world was unknown to him.
"I think you should figure it out on your own, but I can be a good listener".
"thank you, Ayla, I think I would need that".
in the next morning after another dream like the one yesterday, he knew what he should do.
he remember that in the end of their conversation, Ayla told him just one thing, follow your heart, she said, and this is exactly what he would do.
he went to talk with Jondalar.
a couple of days after, he was at the mouth of the cave a haversack on his back.
he said goodbye to everyone, "Jondalar, from now on you are the leader of this cave, until I'll get back." he said in a loud voice so everyone could hear him.
and with that he turned around and walked away.
he only looked back once and saw Ayla making a gesture, he remembered it from her stories,
it meant "walk with Ursus".
*****
Joharran walked for nearly one moon cycle without even knowing where, he just let his heart and feet lead him.
after he got used to the silence, he kind of liked it.
he never been on a journey alone before. the walk was nice, the weather was good and most of the view was stunning.
but most important was that he was alone, with no responsibility, he had a lot to think about. his past, his future, and overlay of all the young women in his dreams.
the hardest times where at night, he missed the human voices of snoring, talking, sharing pleasures, he missed it even more when he woke up from his dreams, always alone, with no one to comfort him.
he thought about the day his mother made him leader.
the zelandonii didn't want a leader without a mate, but he just never found the right woman to share a hearth with, they were all so empty.
but his mother talked with them and settled it up. Marthona said that all her children didn't found a mate yet, then who will she pass the leadership?
his mother knew her children very well. that's why she made him a leader, he enjoyed it. just like she knew to let go of Thonolan, she knew his destiny wasn't with her.
it was always Jondalar she graved on, Marthona was so happy when he came back, and brought Ayla. she loved her like her daughter, from the first moment she saw her she knew why Jondalar left. she was the woman for him.
and when Ayla told her story in the first time, she defended her and didn't let anyone talking bad at her.
when he thought of Ayla he suddenly remembered the woman from is dream, maybe she is my destiny just as Ayla is Jondalar's?
the thought wouldn't go away.
it seems as if he walked forever, he just went on waiting for a sign, from her, from the mother, he didn't got it yet but he had a feeling he was on the right direction.
this day he woke up with the feeling this was the day, this was the day of changes. he just didn't know if it was good changes or bad.
he stopped near the river to fill his waterbags, and when he turn around he saw it. it was a cave.
he didn't know why but he knew that was the place. he was hungry, but he didn't want to wait until he'll get a meal ready, he was so excited. so he took a traveling cake out of his pack.
he almost ran to the cave, but when he reached it he got scared.
"what am I doing in a cave obviously empty? she wasn't here." he said out loud, that scared him a little, he didn't hear himself for a long time. always wrapped up in thoughts.
he felt he was pulled into the cave, and he did not resist.
as he walked in he felt the moisture, and knew no one used it for a long time.
it was dark so he lit up a torch and start pacing ahead.
he walked for hours, it looked as if it never ends, but he wouldn't stop, he wanted to get to her as quick as possible, not wanting to miss her, not like in his dreams.
but after some time he had to stop, he felt exhausted, so he sat down to rest for a few moments.
after he regain himself, he got up and kept on going. he walked for a couple of hours when he notice the dim light in front of him.
he felt all his strength got back, and walked with bigger paces, eager to get there. then he notice the path was beginning to steep up ,and he had to climb.
as he walked out of the cave he gasped in wonder.
it was the most beautiful sight he has ever seen, he found himself in a middle of a meadow and all the flowers was blooming. but he had no time for that, he had to hurry.
he tried to remember the signs and landscape so he could know how to return, and went on walking.
he was so eager to move on that he didn't even notice he was followed.
after a few minutes he heard noise, he turned around but it was too late.
the club landed heavily on his head, and he lost his conscious.
*****