Our company softball team has three seasons under our belt and few wins to show for it.  This of course can be directly attributed to our manager Mickey Neal.  However, in a stroke of genius, he did sign us up for D-League.  So hopefully our performance will improve this new Spring Season.  Below is a tally of our Season along with some pictures of the G-Men crew:

- Mickey sends out an email with our schedule.  It takes 3 emails to get it right.

- Evidently the rehab of our 1st baseman Dan "My Leg Broke by Running into a Person 100 Pounds Lighter Than Me" Mender has gone well as young ladies in a car driving by our first practice marvel at and voice their appreciation of Dan's body in baseball pants.

Game 1: G-Men 16   Borrachos 16 - You would think you couldn't tie in Softball, but you'd be wrong.  Mickey pitched a great game considering it was his first time pitching since all three of our other pitchers were out.  He even struck a batter out swinging.  Jeff Hall was the first casualty with a fractured and dislocated thumb.  We gave up a 7 run lead in the bottom of the 6th to finish in a tie, but all in all, we played a good game.

Injury Report: Out: Jeff Hall (broken thumb)  Probable: Rico (bruised ego-yes, you actually can strike out more than once in softball, but I swear, I hit the ball foul with 2 strikes),  Dave Bauerlein (knee),  Mickey Neal (knee)  Questionable: Dan Mender (permission from wife) John Carbone (old age)

Game 2: G-Men 10   Kawasaki 17 - Ouch.  We started off well, but couldn't hold on after the 3rd inning.   Our hits couldn't find the gaps.  We actually did better when we only had 9 playing.  Somehow, Mickey needs to find a way for us to play the Borrachos every game.

Game 3: G-Men 12   S.B. Locksmith 14 - A decent outing. We had a bottom of the 6th rally, but came up short in the end.  We had our biggest fan turnout, so thanks to those who showed up and cheered us on.  As for highlights, our newest member Mike Lindhal had a very nice (and clean) slide into third that took out their third baseman.  It pays to come watch us.  Also, Mickey institued "the parents rule" for me last night which is, if your parents come, you automatically get to bat first and play shortstop. Thanks mom and dad.

Game 4: G-Men 16   Borrachos 9 - Our first win of the season!  Defensively, we played a great game.  Our outfielders came up with some huge plays.  Peter came up with a highlight reel catch, and Ryan made a great throw to 3rd from Left-Center for an out too.  Dan Mender had a solid game at 1st base, but on a foul ball in his direction, a flashback of Joey Becerra kept him from making a tough play near the dugout.  Offensively we were struggling, but came up with 1 great inning to seal the game.  And of course, Mickey's brilliant game preparation and strategy, not to mention a superb job of 3rd base coaching didn't even give the Borrachos a chance.  Mickey, if you're reading this, just stop here and don't scroll down to see the latest Hit-o-Meter stat.

Updated Injury Report: Out: Jeff Hall (broken thumb), Mickey Neal (knee)  Probable:  Mike Lindhal (bruised vocal chords), Alan Mintz (Mets fan)

Game 5: - The game was cancelled because the umpire didn't show, but we did have a nice fan turnout. Mickey found a positive correllation between promises of brining beer to the game and fan attendance. C'mon, is our impressive display of skill not enough?

Game 6: G-Men 5   S.B. Locksmith 17 - We had to play shorthanded this week and one bad inning killed us.   S.B. Locksmith came up with some good plays to rob us of a couple decent hits, and they managed to find every gap on the field when they were at bat.  Mickey "The Gimp" Neal sucked it up and played despite a torn ACL to pitch for us.  Once again, we look forward to playing the Borrachos to improve our record next game.

Game 7: G-Men 18  Borrachos 15 - Playing the Borrachos has reminded me how much fun winning really is.  Mickey decided to make the game close in the last inning in which we started ahead 18-10.  After a couple shaky moments he struck out two batters to finish the game.  There wasn't very much in the way of highlights except for Mike Lindahl's continous valiant effort to get our team to pep talk.  Oh yeah, and John Greenland made it 5 minutes before gametime.

Game 8: G-Men 8  Kawasaki 14 - Even though we played the best team, losing today sucked.  First of all, they were a bunch of whiners.  I've never heard so much complaining by a team in a long time.  Our team played decent defense, but our bats didn't come through for us this game.   Mickey says we only scored in two innings.  The next games coming up are against the 2nd place S.B. Locksmiths and then Kawasaki again, so we have a rough schedule ahead of us.  Where are the Borrachos when we need them?

Game 9: G-Men 16  S.B. Locksmith 7-We finally beat a team that's not named the Borrachos!  Everything was working...we made only a few errors, and almost every hit was on the ground or a line drive.  The player of the game had to be Alan Penner who came up with some awesome plays at second base.  S.B. Locksmith lost last week as well, so they left us an opportunity to take second place.  They would have to lose to the Borrachos next game and we would have to beat Kawasaki.  Do you believe in miracles?

Game 10: G-Men 15  Kawasaki 18- We started out well, took a 10-3 lead at the end of the 2nd inning but couldn't hold on.  They started hitting pretty well in the latter innings, and we just couldn't keep up.  As for the race for second place, the Borrachos pulled off a win against SB Locksmith, but it was not enough for us.  In fact, there was a little false hope involved since I heard that S.B. Locksmith lost last week, when in fact they did not.  Their third baseman is an idot since he told me they lost, but as Mickey said, what can you expect from a locksmith?   Thanks to all the players and fans for making this the most successful season yet.  Sad, huh? If you scroll down near the bottom, our Manager Mickey "Rule Books" Neal has some thoughts on our season.

For all you statistics buffs out there, this is what I like to call the Home Run Hit-O-Meter. This will track the amount of Home Runs that our Manager Mickey Neal hits throughout the entire season. This is the current stat after 9 Games:

(Note: May 1, 2002)  In all fairness, Mickey is now out with a knee injury, so he really doesn't have a chance to add to the Hit-o-Meter.  But I am a mean person, friend, and roommate, so I will continue to track this stat.  Just to be fair, I have taken the time to calculate his projected home run total based on his prior at bats this season had he remained healthy.  Here is his projected HR total: 0000

(Note: June 20, 2002)  Actually, since we had a hard time fielding players the second half of the season Mickey did have many chances to hit a Home Run....but failed.  He was a trooper however and played with his torn ACL and therefore he does deserve the "Ironman" award of the season.  He'll be our manager this next season, but won't be playing since he'll be going under the knife.  Good luck Mickey! While you're at it, ask the surgeon to replace whatever ligament it is that prevents you from hitting home runs too!

All and all the season was a good one. I want to thank all those who played and gave 100% week in and week out. We couldn't beat the top team but we were able hang with them and we beat the other teams we played. We finished in 3rd place which isn't too bad. We tripled our win total than that in the Fall of last year.

Thanks to Mike for all the positive chatter this Spring and pissing off the other teams with it.

As for Rico, thanks for the Home Run Meter, jerk! Apparently when you had ACL surgery they didn't give you a ligament for hitting home runs either, cuz I don't remember you hitting any homers.

See you in the Fall for another great season of G-Men Softball!

Mickey