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 Archive -- Week 44: 4/27/03 - 5/3/03
Song of the Week: Third Eye Blind - Blinded
5 out of 11 people prefer "Easygoing" friends.

 
April 27, 2003 - fixed by a break
*Sigh*.... school starts again tomorrow. With only 20 days left, it is going to be a great struggle to actually try to get work accomplished. But hopefully my spirits will remain high in the weeks to come. Larry and I went to the mall today to get our tuxes for prom. I got a saucy red one and Larry got a quiet powder blue...As far as a date goes, it looks like I'm going to end up going solo. I'm not really all for the whole "take a friend to prom" thing, I don't know why. Not to mention I'd have a hell of a time getting the balls to ask anyone in the first place. But yeah, we'll see what happens with that. 

I was thinking about the past week or so and how my mindset has changed so much in so little time. I feel like my inner conflict has finally been resolved... or at least finally is headed in the right direction towards a solution. It was a combination of spring break and a few conversations that snapped me out of the feeling I was in. 'Nuff said.
 
Image of the Day

As you can probably tell by the image on the left, I'm running dangerously low on IOTDs! Send me some!!

Quote of the Day - Henry David Thoreau

"Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life. Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something."
 
April 28, 2003 - speeding up
School resumed today... It wasn't all that bad. Next week is gonna be a little bit shaky for me with all my AP tests and the band concert and such. But I don't tend to get stressed from those things. Looking back on it, I wonder what caused my stress breakdown back in October or November (I can't remember when it was)...Maybe emotional issues? I dunno. And my stress level at the moment is not high at all, I can just feel the end of the year coming up swiftly welcoming in the red summer sun. As far as my inner emotional chaos as of late, I am almost done with the uphill part of the trek to normalcy. They say the hardest steps are the final few to the top. But after that, I'll speed down the other side like an oiled up lamb kicked down a giant pile of whale blubber. 
 
Image of the Day

Lyrics of the Day - "Get It Faster" by Jimmy Eat World

I don't care what you do,
I'm getting out, no nothing ever shames me.
Don't wanna thing from you ,
I'm going out , I don't care if you're angry 
I should've thought things through
I'm holding out, but not getting an answer.
 
April 29, 2003 - nothing to be said
It was kinda an off-day for me today. Like, I couldn't really focus on anything, and I just kept thinking that I was alone...not a lonely alone, a peaceful alone. Before I start rambling on and on about something that doesn't make a whole lot of sense, I'll stop. 
 
Image of the Day

(Virus protection.)

Book Quote of the Day - Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad

"Destiny. My destiny! Droll thing life is--that mysterious arrangement of merciless logic for a futile purpose. The most you can hope from it is some knowledge of yourself--that comes too late--a crop of unextinguishable regrets. I have wrestled with death. It is the most unexciting contest you can imagine. It takes place in an impalpable greyness, with nothing underfoot, with nothing around, without spectators, without clamour, without glory, without defeat, in a sickly atmosphere of a tepid scepticism, without much belief in your own right, and still less in that of your adversary. If such is the form of ultimate wisdom, then life is a greater riddle than some of us think it to be."
 
April 30, 2003 - happy birthday joey
Dah! That's how I've been feeling most of the day. Let me take this opportunity to address something that has been brought up to me about my website. I don't write my thoughts, daily experiences, and "revelations" every day to enlighten people. I'm not trying to get people to think like me, feel like me, or anything of that sort. Hell, I don't even care whether or not you read it (though I appreciate it when people do read my words and tell me what they think of them). But the purpose of this top section of each update is mainly so that if I ever want to look back and see how my thoughts changed or haven't change, or remember certain feelings or experiences in life, I can, quickly and easily. Now you ask, "why do you put that online then?" It's simple really. I like reading blogs when I'm bored. So I figure, perhaps people are bored and are interested in the saga of Ross. Perhaps not. Either way, I am not trying to get people to think like me through this website, and if you don't like what I have to say, either A) read it and don't take it to heart; B) don't read it and just look at the IOTD and whatever's at the bottom; or C) just don't visit this site. 'Nuff said about that.

I went to the Phi Beta Kappa dinner tonight, which was surprisingly a pretty good time. Former Congressman Louis Stokes gave an interesting speech, and I was pleasantly surprised that a girl I went to gradeschool with was the Phi Beta Kappa award winner at Chardon High School. So it was cool to see her again, though I was definitely being "introverted Ross," as I am at most places with no one I know very well. 
 
Image of the Day

Happy Birthday Mr. Joe White, you sexy hunk of a man you.

Guestbook Entry-Inspired Quote of the Day - William Shakespeare

"This above all: to thine own self be true; And it must follow, as the night the day; Thou canst not then be false to any man."
 
May 1, 2003 - the beginning of the end
After talking a bit with Ashley, I was hit with a giant ball of nostalgic anxiety tonight. Like, as the year is drawing to a close, I just feel like there are so many people that have meant so much to me over the past four years, and so many things I kinda just take for granted.I'm partially excited to start a new chapter of my life, but I just don't feel ready for this book to close. This is such a turnaround from my thoughts just a week ago of "I can't wait until it's over." Like, even at school there are people I will miss; teachers that have inspired me and helped me get to know myself. I don't want to say goodbye, and I never thought I'd really be one of those emotional kids crying at graduation, but the way I'm feeling now I wouldn't really be surprised. 
 
Image of the Day

Lyrics of the Day - "Say Goodbye To Hollywood" by Billy Joel

So many faces in and out of my life,
Some will last, some will just be now and then.
Life is a series of hellos and goodbyes,
I'm afraid it's time for goodbye again.
 
May 2, 2003 - The Uncanny X-Men
When I was little, I used to read X-Men comics, play with the toys, and watch the television series. The X-Men were my escape from reality, for if only for that half-hour block a week, I could feel like extraordinary things happen. I would think in my head what it would be like to be an X-Men, and before long, my cousin and I generated our own Xmen-like characters. Those characters became a parallel universe, with no connections to the Marvel hit at all. We had a mansion, and instead of Professor X, we had Metamorphic (played by me), also known as Luke Johnson (we were much more creative with mutant names than real names, as you can tell.) I also was Stalker (a guy with an infinite artillery named "Tom Jones"), Vertex (who could skew dimensions of the world around him), Vertices (who could read minds), Vitromex (a time-travelling robot), and a number of other characters, whose names I no longer remember. We drew pictures, filled out elaborate character origins and descriptions, and re-enacted battle scenes with our mutant force. We did this from the time I was about 8 until the time I was about 12, and I believe it was the summer before sixth grade when I told him that "I bet by the end of summer, we will be done with it" and he didn't believe me. But alas, I was right, and I even proceeded to write out the dramatic ending of the saga. I have it filed away somewhere, maybe I should search for that sometime.
 
Image of the Day

My favorite mutants of the Marvel persuasion were Cyclops, Nightcrawler, and Colossus (pictured on the left). Something about having shiny metal skin and super strength appealed to me somehow. Though most people are, I was never really a fan of Wolverine though.

Dramatic Cartoon Dialogue of the Day - X-men

Cyclops: There must have been more mutants in that group than we thought. 
Professor X: I don't think these were the same mutants, Scott. You see, my watch has stopped. 
Cyclops: I don't get it, why's that important? 
Professor X: It's been... 
[Professor X drops the watch, it sticks to the side of his wheelchair] 
Professor X: ...Magnetized. 
 
May 3, 2003 - the cat died a noble death
A droll Saturday for me for the most part, nothing too exciting went on. I watched some Disney channel, parts of a Batman movie, and an episode of Enterprise (never been a Star Trek fan, but Scott Bakula is in that show). As for the evening, probably just a "chill" evening with the gang. It's beginning to kind of feel like summer again, and soon enough summer will be here. I bet it will be gone before I know it. That's all for now.
 
Image of the Day

This interesting-looking cloud is the result of an interesting phenomenon of nature that I only today became aware of. Lenticular (literally meaning lens-shaped) clouds are found only around mountainous areas and are caused by vertical oscillations in air streams. I don't quite understand it fully, so I'll stop there.
 

Quote of the Day - Albert Einstein

"The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity."