Happy birthday Joo-lie!
I don't know what to get you
I know you'd love to get Justin
To be honest, I would also.

I tried to set you guys up
But his schedule wouldn't allow it
You know he's really busy
So I thought a little bit.

I broke into his house last night
And tossed him in a bag.
I guess he couldn't breathe
Cause he REALLY started to nag.

I beat him over the head
With my shoe, I began to pound.
I think I knocked him unconscious
I didn't hear another sound.

I dragged him to the car
And threw him in the trunk
I knew he wouldn't mind
It has the same area as his bunk

I drove him to your house
I knew you'd love his thrustin'
He'd jump up on your bed
And then you'd start 'a lustin'.

I began to think some more
A rare occasion, yes
About what you would do to him
I'm sure you'd make a mess

With toys and such type things
I thought a little more
If I let you have him
He'd come home VERY sore

So, I jumped to a conclusion
That I couldn't give him to you
I'd feel so bad for Justin,
So I had to think of something new

I drove Justin home
And threw him on the lawn
But not before I took his necklace
This, I was gonna pawn

Then I thought NO!
This is the perfect gift!
Justin's JRT necklace!
Julie's spirits will surely lift!

So I wrapped the present up
And drove back to your house
And left it on your doorstep
I was quiet as a mouse.

So here you go Joo-lie!
A present just for you!
I just have one thing to say:
YOU BETTER GET ME SOMETHING TOO!