There are 12 steps to recovering from alcoholism, drug abuse, smoking, and many other addictions. However, no one has written a 12-step program for recovering teenyboppers. I have decided to fill this void. This is for all the teenies who want to change their ways. There are two ways to find out if you are a teenybopper. 1)Click here to see my list of teenyish behaviors. If three or more of the statements sound like something you do, then you may have a problem with teeniness. OR 2)Click here to take the Teenybopper Purity Test. (For those that hadn't noticed before, this is not part of my site, so don't complain to me if it bothers you.) The higher your score, the less teeny you are.
1. Admit that you are powerless over pop music. Your life has become unmanageable due to your obsession with pop artists.
2. Realize that a power greater than yourself could restore you to sanity. I don't mean God here. The power I am speaking of is time. In time, tastes will change and pop groups will fade away. Time heals all wounds and all boppers.
3. Make a decision to turn your stereos over to real music. Time tends to have really good taste in music. Artists that have lasted for 10, 20, or even 30 years tend to have incredible talent. I reccomend the music of Tina Turner - she's all about empowerment, and her music can help get you through this dark time.
4. Make a searching and fearless inventory of your taste in music, movies, and TV. Do you listen to artists solely because they are good-looking and popular? Do you think a movie is good solely because the lead actor is cute? ("Titanic" is a prime example.) Do you watch "Dawson's Creek" just because everyone else does? (If you genuinely like it, that's one thing, but doing something just because everyone does it is really stupid.)
5. Admit the exact nature of your wrongs. This is pretty self-explanatory. Admit to someone that you have a problem with teeniness.
6. Be ready to have time/good music remove all these defects of character. Be open to change. Time can only change you if you let it.
7. Ask someone to help you remove your shortcomings. Giving up teeniness is just like quitting smoking or going on a diet. It's a lot easier if you have someone help you.
8. Made a list of all persons you have harmed, and become willing to make amends to them all. Who has your teeniness hurt? Have you alienated any friends or family? Have you picked on someone for not liking N'Sync? Have you hurt yourself by saying stupid things online/in an email to an anti-site?
9. Make direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continue to take a personal inventory and when you are wrong, promptly admit it.
11. Seek to improve, through the internet, good radio stations, and most importantly, no longer watching MTV, your contact with non-teeny music.
12. After having had an awakening as the result of these steps, try to carry this message to teenyboppers and to practice these principles in all your affairs.
These steps are based on the ones posted on AA's website at www.aa.org.