© 1997 by Kathy. May not be reproduced without permission
It was his eyes, those green eyes, watching, watching all the time. Everywhere he went, on his back during school, at mealtimes, everywhere.
He tried to stare back, but the eyes just looked away and returned as soon as he turned. They came to him in his dreams, when he found himself screaming, but nothing came out...
Sunday (each day had a name!) was strange. The orphans got up as usual, but had to dress with different clothes. No breakfast was taken, and everyone lined up silently. Running Buck did as everyone else did - but without understanding. Perhaps it is a feast day, or a day these people remember their brave warriors. The children marched over to a different building, the one which stood apart from the others. Sister Mary Catherine's disapproving eye checked each child as they marched past.
"You! Running Fox or Wolf or Horse or whatever your name is! Get that heathen thing off now!"
Now what have I done? Sister Mary Catherine seemed to have taken it upon herself to make Running Buck's life her own personal mission field; the problem was that she saw anything and everything he did as somehow evil and wrong. "Yes, Sister?" That was another thing, why did these women who weren't related to him want him to call him 'sister'? Especially when the idea of having Indian blood in a person made them so mad?
"Take that off before you go into the house of the Lord!" Mary Catherine's hand moved up to grab Running Buck's medicine pouch. He stepped back, moving into a defensive posture before he even thought about it.
"What do you mean?" He tried to keep his voice low and calm, but nothing lessened the woman's rage.
"That thing! You will not blaspheme in church! Now take it off or..."
"Sister Mary Catherine" Mother Superior's voice cracked like a whip across the yard. "Enough!"
Instantly the nun backed off, although none of her indignation dissipated. "Mother, that thing around his neck..."
"I know what it is and what it means, at least, I think I do. Running Buck," Mother Superior added in an aside, "We must talk about that later, I'm sure you can explain a few things to me."
"Yes, Mother," Running Buck answered, grateful for Mother's intervention, but not really knowing the cause. The medicine pouch must be bad, but what was the 'Lord?' Or 'blasphemy?' Will I ever understand?
"It's all right, Running Buck, follow the others and you will see your first church service. You won't understand, but you will see me at 1 o'clock and we will talk about any questions you have. I'm sure there will be plenty."
"Yes, Mother." He didn't move, unsure of himself again.
"Go on, now." He left, hearing Mother Superior behind him address Sister Mary Catherine in a much more severe tone. "You will see me straight after Mass, Sister..."
Inside the church, already seated, he waited for the Indian to come in. Maybe he'll sit next to me - but he probably won't. I wonder what they've told him about me? Does he think I'm a dummy too? They must have told him. They always do.
He's quiet - not like I thought at all! I thought he'd be fierce, angry, talk like 'How! and 'Me wantum food!' But he doesn't. he eats like us - well, he will if he can ever handle that fork! And as for trying to write with his left hand...
They treat him like me, hating the differences. But I'm not different - not inside! I'm not poisonous! I won't make them sick! How can I show them? There has to be a way. There just has to! He stood when the priest came in, just like the others, and followed the Mass, not like the others at all.
