Cast :

       Norman Bates - Vince Vaughn  (Swingers, Clay Pigeons, Return To Paradise)

       Marion Crane - Anne Heche  (Return To Paradise, Six Days, Seven Nights, The Juror)

       Lila Crane - Julianne Moore  (Boogie Nights, Short Cuts, Lost World)

       Sam Loomis -  Viggo Mortensen  (Perfect Murder, Crimson Tide, G.I. Jane)

       Arbogast - William H. Macy (Fargo, Boogie Nights, Air Force One)

Director: Gus Van Sant (directed To Die For and Good Will Hunting)

Zzzzz...Hahahahaha.  You have just seen the only two emotions that I expressed in the 1 hour and 38 minutes that I forced myself to sit through this movie. I was bored for the majority of this movie, then found some humor as it concluded but nothing even remotely close to redeeming my moviegoing experience.

The story is known by most, but for those who don't know, I'll recap.  Norman Bates is motel owner, with a major league Oedipal complex.   He encounters Marion Crane, a businesswoman, on the run for the theft of money from her boss.  Curious of her whereabouts are 1) A private detective named Arbogast 2) Her sister, Lila who ends up teaming with 3) Her boyfriend Sam.  Riveting stuff so far isn't it.

The problems of this movie  don't even begin to come from a  comparison between the two movies.  But since I can compare them loosely (its been many years since I saw the original Psycho, and never in its entirety.  I have, however, seen enough to be able to know what it is about, and judge based upon that).  First of all, I mentioned the boredom factor.  If you just look at this story, plain and simple, it is boring.  The appeal of the original, was Hitchcock's mastery at creating suspense in the commonest of situations.  Van Sant has not reached that level of filmmaking yet.  His previous efforts did not even begin to show that he could touch Alfred's work.  (Yes, he did direct Good Will Hunting, but the joy of that movie came not from its direction, but from the masterful, Oscar-winning script). The brief humorous interlude comes during the infamous climax scene, Perkins made it chilling, Vaughn makes it silly.  Half of the audience in my theater laughed.   Secondly, the performances, they were not impressive.  The best of the lot is Vaughn, who brings Bates innocent, but creepy skittishness to the screen quite well.   He seems to be the only one in this picture with a personality.  The worst of the lot is Macy.  He is completely cardboard.  He walks around his scenes, as does the rest of the cast, like an 8th-grade class interpretation of Hitchcock.  Macy shows no emotion, or expression (and I know he can)  Moore shows a bit, Mortensen too, but for the most part, they appear to be actors, play characters. 

I don't want to get off on too much of a rant really about this movie.  It was basically quite a disappointment. It also reiterates my philosophy on remakes.  If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it.  Psycho was a classic, if you're going to remake, add something, show me something, give me some of you in it.  Van Sant tries, inserting some inexplicable visions into the murder scenes, again, pointless and humorless, and by the end, I couldn't get out of the theater fast enough.  Avoid this one, and watch the original. ($1/2)

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