That Mirror Was Modest Productions - 'Fox & Rat'
Title: Alex In Wonderland
Written by: Kristi
Summary: Strange things happen to Krycek after little green men visit him from outerspace.
Spoilers: None.
Disclaimer: I do not own John Doggett, Monica Reyes, Fox Mulder, Alex Krycek, Dana Scully, Walter Skinner, Marita Covarrubias, or Melvin Frohike. They belong to Chris Carter, Ten-Thirteen Productions, and 20th Century FOX Broadcasting. Robert Alfredo belongs to me and my partner in crime, Cassie.


FADE IN:

INT. LOOKING OUT KRYCEK'S BEDROOM WINDOW - NIGHT

It's a starry night... not a cloud in the sky. The moon is shining brightly into the room. It's a calm and peaceful night. Krycek is having sleeping problems and is staring out his window... up into the stars. He notices a star that is out of the ordinary... it's a bright green star... and it seems to be moving closer...

KRYCEK
What the...

He gets out of his bed and walks over to his window and opens it to get a better look. The green light is coming towards him very fast, but it's not getting any bigger.

From inside the bright green light are high squeaky small voices.

SQUEAKY VOICE
(as it comes closer)
AHHHHHHHHHH!

ANOTHER SQUEAKY VOICE
STOP THIS THING!!

Krycek realizes that this tiny bright green light is going to hit him in the head if he doesn’t move. He falls backwards right as the bright green light (1 inch in diameter) whizzes past him. The green light continues to fly around the room, knocking things over until it finally falls softly onto Krycek's bed. The room has been silenced from the high pitched yelling.

Krycek carefully looks to his bed from the floor... the bright green light is dimming.

The room finally goes dark again...

SUDDENLY! A bright light shines from the tiny... spacecraft... lighting up the whole room.

KRYCEK
(blinded)
AHH!

He shields his eyes from the light... The light goes out! Krycek looks to his bed where the spacecraft landed and sees two little green men looking up at him.

KRYCEK
(to himself)
And Mulder said they were gray...

One of the small green men steps forward, he is General Slounder.

GENERAL SLOUNDER
(high squeaky voice)
We are from the planet Zemplantion!

KRYCEK
You bring me peace?

The other small green man steps forward, he is Commador Xion.

COMMADOR XION
NO! We bring you war!

Krycek looks scared and starts to back away.

GENERAL SLOUNDER
No, no, no... we bring him
a hellish torture! (beat) Not war!

Commador Xion looks down... ashamed of himself.

KRYCEK
(appauled)
Why me?!

GENERAL SLOUNDER
Because!

In the background Commador Xion is digging through a bag. He finds a bright glowing green bottle.

COMMADOR XION
General Slounder, I have it.

He hands the bottle to General Slounder.

GENERAL SLOUNDER
With this, we give you
your hellish torture.

General Slounder tosses the bright glowing green powder onto Krycek. Krycek starts to yell and scream and shake... trying to get it off him when:

SCREECHING TIRES
SMASH CUT TO:

Krycek waking up with a start! He is breathing heavy... only a bad dream... Krycek smacks himself to wake up... he gets out of bed and goes to the kitchen...

INT. KITCHEN

Krycek shuffles in and walks over to the refrigerator... not noticing a two-foot grasshopper sitting on the counter watching him. Krycek retrieves a bowl of cherries and sits down at the table. He still hasn't noticed the two-foot grasshopper. Krycek starts to eat the cherries.

Then suddenly, the grasshopper leaps to the table!

KRYCEK
AAAAAHHHHHHH!!

The grasshopper looks at him curiously...

GRASSHOPPER
(in Monica's voice)
Shut up!

Krycek stops screaming immediately. His eyes are wide with a mix of fear and confusion.

KRYCEK
Wh-what the hell? (beat) Monica?

GRASSHOPPER
(Monica's voice)
What? You never seen
a grasshopper before?

The grasshopper is now pissed at Krycek.

KRYCEK
(standing away/still with cherries)
Not... a talking one...

GRASSHOPPER
(Monica's voice/ready to do anything)
You think your better than me?

Krycek is now beyond the point of fear... he's terrified. The last thing he wants is Monica Reyes mad at him... and this time... she's a mean grasshopper.

GRASSHOPPER
(Monica's voice)
Of course you do! You
pulled the wings off of
my friend when you were five!!

The grasshopper leaps towards Krycek, who begins to scream.

ANGLE - GRASSHOPPER

flying right towards Krycek... when:

CUT TO:

INT. BLACK BLANK ROOM

Krycek stands in the middle of blackness screaming. A beat passes before he realizes he is all alone. He looks around into nothingness.

KRYCEK
(confused)
Hello?

He walks around in a circle and starts to come right towards us, when he rams into something and his face is smashed up against it.

Behind him someone laughs. Krycek quickly turns around, recognizing the laugh.

KRYCEK
Mulder?...

Mulder is behind him. He is dressed as a magician... with a blue cape and a red collar. He's even got a huge turban hat on. He stares back at Krycek.

MULDER
What?

KRYCEK
(dead panned)
You're dressed like a fag.

Mulder starts to laugh hysterically.

MULDER
(still laughing)
You're the one ramming into nothing!

He continues to laugh. Krycek frowns.

KRYCEK
What is this place?

MULDER
How the hell should I know?!
It's what's in your head, goofy!

KRYCEK
Huh?

MULDER
(revealing the answer to his 'joke')
NOTHING! Haha!

Krycek is getting pissed at Mulder.

KRYCEK
So how do I get out?

Mulder looks around.

MULDER
(pointing somewhere)
There.

Krycek looks to where Mulder is pointing. Mulder is pointing to a door... it looks like it's just suspended there... being held by nothing.

Krycek gives Mulder a look.

KRYCEK
And where does this lead me?

MULDER
Out of here!

Krycek turns away from Mulder.

KRYCEK
(to himself)
I feel like Alice in Wonderland...

Krycek opens the door... there is nothing but black empty space again. Krycek shrugs and goes through. The door leads no where... Krycek walks around the door... Mulder laughs.

KRYCEK
Ok... Mul-

Mulder is gone! But Krycek can still hear him laughing.

KRYCEK
MULDER!!

MULDER
(laughing)
Ooh ooh! Hee hee!

Krycek is turning frantically in circles trying to find him. Mulder continues to laugh.

KRYCEK
WHERE ARE YOU?!

Suddenly, everything starts to spin... the black turns to bright spring colors... very cartoonish.

The spinning stops and Krycek finds himself in a forest with bright colorful flowers. Birds are singing and it's very peaceful and happy. O.S. he hears the sound of laughter, not Mulder. He starts to follow the sound.

SHORT TIME CUT

EXT. FOREST CLEARING

Krycek now sees who the laughter is coming from... Marita. She is wearing a white flower dress and is swinging on a swing set.

Marita spots Krycek and runs up to him.

MARITA
(happy)
Alex!

She kiss him... Krycek shuts his eyes... he doesn't mind this one bit. Marita stops kissing him. Krycek opens his eyes... it is no longer sunny out. Angry clouds are moving in... the winds picking up. A crash of lightening and a bang of thunder.

MARITA
We have to get back to the castle!

She whistles and two white horses run up. Both of the horses have elegant saddles with gold and diamonds on them. Marita grabs her red velvet cape and gets on a horse.

MARITA
Come on Alex!

Krycek gets on a horse... and this is when he realizes he is wearing fairy tale-esque prince cloths. He is completely confused, and horrified at the thought of himself being dressed like this. They quickly ride to the castle.

CUT TO:

INT. ENTRANCE OF THE CASTLE

Marita and Krycek ride in. The storm outside begins to get worse and it starts to rain hard.

Scully and Skinner quickly approach them. they too are dressed in fairy tale-esque clothing of royalty. They wear crowns.

SKINNER
(powerfully)
You have dishonored us
for the last time.

He is talking to Krycek... who is having a hard time with his cloths.

KRYCEK
What? How?

SCULLY
(to guards)
Take him to the dungeon. There
he will think about what he has done
for the next three hundred years!

The guards come up and grab him by the arms.

KRYCEK
(sarcastic)
No one can live for three
hundred years, Scully.

The guards drag him away.

SCULLY
(to Skinner)
Who's Scully?

Skinner shrugs his shoulders.

CUT TO:

INT. DUNGEN

The guards push Krycek in, and lock the door. Krycek looks around and the only thing in there is hay... and no light.

KRYCEK
Hey come on fellas!
(beat) At least a pillow?!

There is no answer from the guards, who go off laughing. There is a noise from a far corner. Krycek turns in alert.

KRYCEK
Who's there?

MAN'S VOICE
Please don't hurt me.

There is a flash of lightening and it is enough to reveal that the man is none other than Robert Alfredo.

KRYCEK
Alfredo?

Krycek goes over to Alfredo, who has a long beard and long hair. He's been here for a while.

KRYCEK
I can get you out.

He puts his hand out to help Alfredo up.

ALFREDO
(demon voice)
Get away from me!

Krycek backs up with a start. Alfredo rises with power.

ALFREDO
(demon voice)
You fool!

And he pushes Krycek out the window... Below, we see the moat that surrounds the castle. Krycek splashes down and the only thing we can see are the bubbles rising.

When the bubbles clear we see Krycek back in his normal cloths laying on the sand. Some fish swim by him... Krycek opens his eyes and sits up... he shakes his head from the fall. He looks around and sees a man with flippers and a purple and green spotted dino floaty around his waist. It's Frohike. When they speak it sounds bubbly.

FROHIKE
Krycek!

Krycek gives him an odd look.

FROHIKE
What?

KRYCEK
(dead panned)
You're wearing that?

Frohike ignores him.

FROHIKE
I have to show you something.

He starts to walk away from Krycek. Krycek follows.

CUT TO:

INT. UNDERWATER CAVERN

Frohike enters, followed by Krycek. There is a big bird feeder type thing in the middle of a big empty space.

FROHIKE
Go there... see what they've done.

Krycek is a little confused but goes anyway.

The bird-feeder thing has four fish in it... but the fish have the heads of Mulder, Scully, Skinner and Marita.

FROHIKE
That's going to be us...
if you don't do it.

KRYCEK
Do what?

Frohike stares at him blankly as a current begins to come in.

FROHIKE
It's too late...

KRYCEK
(panicked)
What's happening?!

FROHIKE
It's the end...

There is a twirl of current and both of them go in different directions.

KRYCEK
Waaaaaaiiiitttt!!!!

SMASH CUT TO:

INT. KRYCEK'S BEDROOM

Krycek is in his bed. It is morning.

KRYCEK
-aaaaiiiitttt!!

He sits up in his bed, breathing hard once again.

His alarm clock goes off and the radio comes on playing "Good Mornin' Life" by Dean Martin. Krycek looks at his clock... 8:00am... time to go to work. Krycek gets up.

CUT TO:

INT. FBI HALLWAY

No one is in the hallways... very unusual, but Krycek keeps walking.

CUT TO:

INT. FBI - DOGGETT/REYES OFFICE

Krycek enters, almost expecting Doggett to have a plant body. But he's normal. Krycek let's out a sigh of relief.

DOGGETT
(looking up from a folder)
Good morning, sleep well?

Krycek plops into Monica's chair (she's not there).

KRYCEK
Heh... not really. I
had this strange dream...

DOGGETT
...that you were attacked
by a two foot grasshopper
that sounded like Monica, and
that your friends were fish?

Krycek looks up amazed.

KRYCEK
Yeah... how did you-

DOGGETT
You're still having it.

KRYCEK
So when are you going
to do something strange?

DOGGETT
When your mind wants me to.

Doggett goes back to his file. Krycek sits there pondering something.

KRYCEK
Um... John?

DOGGETT
Yes?

KRYCEK
How do I get out?

Doggett looks up at him.

DOGGETT
I don't think you realize
what has happened to you.

KRYCEK
What do you mean?

Doggett puts his file down on the desk.

DOGGETT
You know what happened
last night, don't you?

KRYCEK
Yeah, aliens came to visit me.

Doggett shakes his head 'no'.

DOGGETT
You are in a coma
right now, Krycek.

KRYCEK
(amused)
No I'm not...
I'm with you.

Doggett gets up from his desk.

DOGGETT
Follow me.

They head to the door, Doggett opens it.

On the other side of the door, there is a hospital waiting room. Mulder, Skinner, Scully, Marita, Monica, Alfredo, Frohike, and even Doggett are there.

Doggett (with Krycek) turns to Krycek.

DOGGETT
They are all here because
you had a terrible accident.

KRYCEK
Car?

DOGGETT
Motorcycle.

Krycek is confused.

KRYCEK
I don't own a motorcycle.

DOGGETT
I know.

KRYCEK
I don't get it.

DOGGETT
Listen, the only way you
can get out of this, is
to get out of that coma.

KRYCEK
How?

DOGGETT
You'll know.

KRYCEK
But-

Krycek is cut out when Doggett dissolves out of sight. Krycek looks into the hospital. The FBI has disappeared behind him and is now the hospital.

KRYCEK'S POV - MARITA

she is in tears and Scully is comforting her.

Mulder is pacing back and forth. Very nervous.

Krycek enters the hospital waiting room.

CUT TO:

INT. HOSPITAL ROOM

Krycek walks in and sees himself in a coma. The real Krycek (in the coma) has a huge bandage wrapped all the way around his head... a machine is helping him breathe.

There is a bright flack of white light.

CUT TO:

INT. HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM

A doctor walks in... everyone looks up worried.

DOCTOR
Things aren't looking
good for him.

Scully puts her arm around Marita.

DOCTOR
Now I want you to keep
optimistic, but I'd also
hope you'll prepare yourself
for the worst.

Mulder can't take it anymore. He sits down and cries really hard.

As the hours pass, everyone falls asleep in their chairs, save for Doggett, he's standing outside the hospital room window watching Krycek, while drinking coffee.

After a few beats he throws his empty coffee cup away and enters the room Krycek is in.

INT. KRYCEK'S HOSPITAL ROOM

Doggett takes a seat next to Krycek's bed. The only noise is from the steady beeps from the machines.

Doggett looks intensely at Krycek... an unheard dialogue running through his mind, to Krycek. Doggett turns his head to look out the door. Krycek's eyes flutter open, then his hand twitches. Doggett hears this and looks at his friend.

DOGGETT
(smiling)
Decided you'd come
back to the real world?

KRYCEK
(hoarse voice)
Guess I had a reason...

Krycek has a small cough attack.

DOGGETT
Take it easy, Agent.

Krycek finally settles down. Doggett helps him sit back and hands him a cup of water.

DOGGETT
You're lucky I found you.

KRYCEK
You found me?

Doggett takes a seat again.

DOGGETT
Sprawled out on the asphalt.
(beat) What were you doin'?

KRYCEK
I-I (clears throat) I'm
not sure.

There is a beat of silence. Doggett gets up and walks towards the door.

KRYCEK
(softly/rough voice)
John... I-

Doggett stops and turns at the door.

KRYCEK
Thank you for saving my life.

DOGGETT
You did that on your own.

He gives Krycek a friendly smile and exits the room... leaving Krycek with this thoughts... knowing that he has, in a way, saved Krycek.

FADE OUT:

THE END.