"See this, Mainstreamer, all better now. I've gotten my cast taken off, and now, I can only get better from here on out. Oh, hold on one second."
PKA holds up his right hand, with index finger out. He then holds up three fingers and brings in his fingers one by one as he counts.."Three... two... one..." Just as he says one, his fist is in a ball and....BOOM! The house we saw before explodes into thousands of peices! The porch peices fly everywhere, the tree lights on fire, the shrubs are burned to a crisp.. the whole house collapses. PKA smiles, as he walks along where he's at, and behind him we see another house, similar to the one before it. He raises up his fingers in the air and counts easily "Uno... dos... tres...." BOOOM! That house then explodes! "Boom."... after PKA says that the car in the driveway also explodes! Things are flying everywhere. Fire fills the background, and PKA smiles.
PKA continues on, walking. He stops, and in the background is now what looks to be a gas station. There are no cars parked in it though. He looks at the camera, smiling. "Damn, this is some fun shit Mainstreamer. I can see why you enjoy it so much. I man, the high you get off of blowing shit up.. its incredible. You've blown up so much stuff in your life, and you contiue doing so. Is that some kind of a addiction that you can't stop? I'm not quite sure. But from what I understand, hell, you can't get enough of it."
PKA motions over to someone behind the camera, "Hey, let me have that thing." PKA is handed a device, and he holds it up, with a smile on his face. He pushes the red button and the gas station explodes. This explosion is bigger than the previous two, with gasoline mixing with explosives to create a violent blaze of heat. PKA laughs sadistically as he walks along. "Holy shit! That was a big one! Ever blown up a gas station? That was the shit right there! I tell ya.. but in all seriousness Mainstreamer, there has to be a logical explanation for your addiction. People don't just go blow up shit. Its one of two things. Let me explain.. oh wait.. one second."
PKA stops walking and presses the button again and a parked car explodes behind him! Tires are sent into the air, the hood flies open, fire coming from the inside. PKA doesn't laugh this time. He just sits down in a chair, and nods, with his head down. He then points his eyes up at the camera again.
"Explanation numero uno... you are gay. Now I'm sure you have been approached by a lot of fans in the past wanting your autograph, but have any of them ever asked for sex? Sure, I bet they have. I mean, who wouldn't want to sleep with a hairy bastard like ya'self? Huh? But tell me, was there ever a man? Was there ever a male fan of yours that came up, wanting a little more than an autograph? Or was it just that he wanted an autograph on his ass.. but not in ink? I think you get where I'm going Mainstreamer.. oh wait, I forgot, you probably are still processing this. I know your brain takes a little while to get up to speed. Here, let's turn on some nice Elton John, blow up another building, and let your brain fully turn on."
PKA pushes a tape into a cassette player and pushes PLAY. Elton John begins to play. PKA kicks back in his chair, pretending to enjoy the music. He looks at his devise in his hand and pushes the button. An explosion is heard off camera. PKA looks to his left and chuckles a bit. He shakes his head and leans forward, pushes STOP and EJECT then takes the tape out and tosses it into a nearby wall, as we hear it shatter.
"Damn that shit was annoying. Okay, are we 100 percent yet or are you still loading? What? Good? Okay, great. See, what I'm saying is, your fetish for blowing things up.. well.. let's say when you're off camera, the blowing doesn't stop. Let's leave it right there shall we?"
PKA then looks at his once-injured wrist. He observes it, and checks it out. He looks back up at the camera. "I think its gonna be all right, don't you? No..STOP!!! DON'T....THINK. Please, I want you to be 100 percent in our match, not injured from using your head. Aight.. on to the next explanation.. explanation numero dos... you are crying out from the inside. Its true, yes it is.. or.. it could be.. I'm not the genius here! You are! Remember? You're the champ!" PKA turns his head to the side and 'fake coughs' saying "Loser!" during it. He turns back with a grin on his face.
"Let's be truthful here.. let's be honest.. you are going out of your mind. I'm sure that the process of exploding buildings is just your way of crying out to the world and trying to get a hint by that you are a lonely man. I see the way you act in your promos. I see how you are. You aren't ever with any real friends. Sure, you have business associates, people you work with, but are they true friends? Even a stupid shit like yourself should know that in this day and age, its hard to trust people in the wrestling business. One day they're your ally, the next they are fucking your girlfriend and going behind your back trying to get!!!---" PKA pauses and takes a deep breath. "Sorry, got a little mixed up there. Back to what I was saying. You need to let it all out Mainstreamer. Don't keep blowing these buildings up because you are scared to show your true feelings. Hell, we all know you're dumb. We all know your sex life lacks .. well, sex. We all know that you are hiding from us. Come on, let it all out, we won't judge you. Honestly."
PKA smiles. He stands up and walks along. Behind him now is a fire truck racing to put out the fire.. PKA turns around and looks back at the camera with an angry look on his face. He shouts, "NO!", and clicks the device. An explosion happens off camera, supposedly the fire truck. PKA nods in approval and continues walking. There is something tall standing next to him, but it is covered up with a shiny, gold blanket. PKA looks at it, then the camera.
"What is this, you ask? Well, in perspective, its you. See, you are under this blanket. You're hiding something. Whether its number one or number two, you need to let it all out, and tell everyone the truth. Once you do so, the blanket will come off, no longer shading you from what you can truely be. This also represents your championship belt. Look at it, how shiny and golden it is. Just like your belt, this blanket is going to come off of you.. just.. like.. " PKA pulls the blanket off. "..that."
Underneath is a wax figure of The Mainstreamer. He stands there with his finger up his nose and his hand in the air, with a dumb-founded look on his face. "Oh, got a question little Mainy? Well too bad! The questioning is over! Its time for you to listen. See, I had the local wax museum here in LA hook me up with an exact... replica of you. This is how I think you are, at least. Look at you, raising your hand.. you have a question. Actually, you have a lot, but not everyone can know everything in the world. And you then have your finger up your nose. Hey, that's an improvement from it being up your ass. You see, this figure is how I see you. I don't take you personally, Mainstreamer. You can insult me. You can say I am not focused. You can say I'm not concentrating on what's important in preparing for this match. Say whatever the hell you want to say. The fact of the matter is that I'm focused on you, Mainstreamer. And when I'm focused on you, I'll rip you to peices. I'll blow your ass to fuckin' outer space if you try to do some stupid shit at Gladiator."
The camera then pans out, showing a lot of movie cameras, bright lights, and what looks to be a movie set. The buildings that were behind him are surrounded by a lot of crew members, cleaning up the mess. PKA smiles as he begins to speak once more. "You see all of this? It was all fake. Just like you and the words that come out of your mouth, its all a fake! And at Gladiator, you will be dealt with.. and at Gladiator, Pain Kicks Ass."
PKA backs off as the camera focuses in on the head of the wax figure. It then explodes! The peices go everywhere. The camera keeps a close hold on the spot where the head used to be. The smoke clears, and then the camera pans out to show a headless Mainstreamer. We fade to black.
The scene opens as we see a small residential home. Its surrounded by shrubs, dark green grass, a tall pine tree, and a nice shine from the light above. The camera then pans out as we see PKA. He steps in front of the house. He holds up his arms, the cast is no longer on his left arm/wrist.
