Title: A Terrible Tragedy

Series: Vicious Strays

Author: Kiara (Kiara_Rogue@hotmail.com)

Pairing: S/X

Rating: overall NC-17, but its pretty tame most chapters. There'll be a warning before the nookie.

Summary: Necrophiliac monks with a necronomicon help our boys perform necromancy to save the world? Huh?

Disclaimer: I'm not nearly insane enough to be considered even remotely Josslike, so, not mine.

Distribution: Take it, I don' need it.

Feedback: um...yes please? I'm a sad lonely bum so I like it

A/N: Okay so I started this story a zillion years ago and ran out of inspiration and then the other day I was sitting on the bus wondering why the lady in front of me hadn't discovered deodorant yet and my muse attacked. I went home and sat typing from 6 p.m. to 3:30 a.m. when migraine induced blindness forced me to take an unpleasant break. And now I have it. Its unbetaed so all mistakes are mine, but here it is.

This takes place in a Buffy quasi mid-season four kind of place. Anya never came back after prom and so the Scoobies are all in a flirty kind of place. Buffy with Riley, Willow with Tara, and Xander with...um. guess! *snort* And yes, my version of Buffy is insane. Why do you ask?

%%- indicates thoughts

~~~~

"So did Spike run off after you left last night, Xan?" Buffy asked in an obvious attempt to avoid the book that Giles had assigned her to investigate. He looked up from his own unwanted assignment with a grin that conveyed both his knowledge at her irresponsible distractions and his gratitude for it.

"Nah, he only stumbled a bit and that was too the car and then too the bed, where he no doubt remains even now...jerk." Buffy gave him a weird look. "What?"

"Think about what you just said, Xander. Spike slept in your bed last night?" She wiggled her eyebrows and grinned at him. "Is there something you aren't telling us?" Xander scowled and threw a handy couch cushion at her. They were both sitting on the couch that had served as Giles' bed the night before. Willow and Giles were in the kitchen discussing something magic-related rather heatedly while Giles made tea. Buffy and Xander knew better to get involved in their magic "discussions".

Buffy easily dodged the projectile cushion and laughed at him. "Oh c'mon Xander, if you and Spike are bumping uglies then you should come clean now in case I walk in on you two necking and think he's having a snack. Dusty gay lovers probably aren't any good in bed." She giggled at him. The idea of Spike and Xander was so strange that she couldn't help but tease.

"Ah, well, you've found me out. Spike's my nasty demon lover and even now he's recovering from the best sex in his unlife." He deadpanned. Buffy blinked owlishly at him for a moment before bursting into giggles.

"Omigawd for a second I thought you were serious!" Xander sputtered and swatted her with a cushion.

"Nice to know you have such faith in my sexuality. You know how I love the womens..." He scolded her. She just giggled at him until stopping suddenly and wrinkling her nose up cutely.

"Oh dear god I have a mental picture!" She gasped, then turned an appraising look on him that had him squeaking and hiding behind his book. "And suddenly I understand why lesbians hold so much appeal for men..." She grinned. He was threatening to hit her with his book when Willow and Giles came into the room again. Willow was clutching the book that had appeared on Giles' doorstep a month earlier. Giles was frowning, but they didn't mention what they'd been arguing about. Willow settled in a chair with the book and started flipping through it sullenly.

"Buffy, Xander, I'm afraid that we will have to risk making another trip into my flat. The books I brought last night aren't nearly enough to ascertain the true nature of this threat." Buffy jumped up enthusiastically. She was tired of sitting around and her wound from before had already healed to a shallow scrape. Xander hopped up as well.

"Lets go liberate us some books!" He enthused. Giles gave him an odd look. "Books that only like to be read by Watchers and witches and hate being abused by the filthy hands of Slayers and their chauffeurs." He trailed off and Buffy rolled her eyes and gave him a sarcastic thumbs up.

"Nice attempt, Xan. A bit shaky on the dismount." She whispered to him as they left the house side by side, followed by a bemused Giles.

"How shaky?" He whispered back.

"I'd say a 9.0." She surmised. "On the lame-ass scale." He stuck his tongue out at her and got into the car.

~~~

Xander hadn't seen the damage when he'd picked them up the night before, but now that they were approaching the scene of the attack, he was a bit stunned. The place was destroyed. As Buffy had said, it was like a tornado of knives had torn through the place leaving huge slashes in almost every surface. Xander wondered how the hell Giles had escaped with only a bump on the noggin.

Buffy ventured into the wreckage first, ready to leap out at the first sign of a renewed attack, but it was quiet. Giles looked to Xander. "We must move quickly. Buffy will watch while we get what we need. Stay close to me and only take what I give you." He ordered. Xander nodded and then scrambled to follow the older man as he entered the battered doorway past the surprisingly unharmed door. The attack hadn't left the flat.

The two men moved quickly to the shelves while Buffy stood watch. Giles quickly started loading Xander up with battered books and then grabbed a few himself before he indicated that he was finished. They reconvened in the courtyard outside, Xander offloaded the heaviest books into Buffy's arms with a grin. "Join me in my pack-mulery." He requested gallantly. She rolled her eyes at him.

"Well nothing went all Peeves on us, Giles. Does that mean its gone or is it napping?" Buffy asked. Giles shifted a few of his books and started leading them back to the car.

"Either could be true but I would like to be sure before moving back in all the same. There should be a spell in one of these references that will help us discern the nature of the attacker and from whence it came." Xander did a quick Giles translation in his head and then grinned at Buffy.

"Someday he'll just say 'I dunno.'" He cracked. She snorted.

"And then the Hellmouth will open and little bunny foo-foo will come bop us on the head..." They piled their liberated books in the trunk and then got back in the car. "Lets drive-through Doublemeat and bring back some lunch." She suggested.

Xander shrugged and did as he was told. When it came time for money to be handed over Giles merely handed over a twenty with a resigned sigh that made Xander and Buffy exchange evil grins. "Thanks Dad!" They chirped in unison. Giles muttered something undoubtedly nasty under his breath. Xander passed the bags of food and drinks to his passengers and took off again.

"Oh, hey, has Spike hit you up for blood lately?" Xander asked him as he drove.

"Not in the past couple weeks, why do you ask?" Giles answered.

"Just wondering. He looked like crap last night, didn't he?" Xander commented. Buffy gave him a teasing look in the rear view mirror and started humming "sitting in a tree". He rolled his eyes.

"Actually, he did look rather...underfed." Giles agreed thoughtfully. "But I'm certain that if he was having too much difficulty feeding himself he would let us know. Loudly and annoyingly as possible, no doubt." Xander nodded in agreement but resolved to stop by the butcher later. It didn't seem smart to him to keep the back-up muscle all weak and kittenish from starvation. That and Spike was less likely to hide in his basement if he were strong enough to take care of himself.

~~~

When they got back to the house they found Willow talking on the phone and looking worried. They unloaded the food and books while she finished her conversation and turned her attention to them. "That was Stacy from down the hall, Buffy. Our dorm's just been trashed. She thinks it was a frat prank or something but it sounds more like our poltergeist..." She filled them in. Buffy looked stricken.

"Did...did it get in the closets?" She asked, pale, as she lowered herself onto the couch. "Tell me it didn't get my clothes!" She begged. Willow sat next to her and patted her hand comfortingly.

"Stacy says that your closet was locked like normal, but mine was wide open and everything was shredded." She said looking upset. Buffy hugged her.

"Oh Will, your poor clothes!" She moaned. Xander exchanged a look with Giles.

"What a terrible tragedy." Giles commented dryly.

"Too bad people didn't get hurt instead of the poor clothes..." Xander answered with a grin. The girls scowled at them.

"Yes, well, this is good in that it gives us a bit more to work with." Giles said, getting down to business. "Buffy, you and Xander go to your dorm and see if there is anything useful about. Willow, please check online for records of anything similar happening." He ordered, settling down with his books.

"Right, we'll do that. After food." Xander said and plopped down on the couch and reached for the bag on the coffee table. Willow and Buffy gathered around as well and Giles just gave another resigned sigh and reached for his fries.