James Matheson, 30, midfield. Although 'Mamax' will not admit it, he is now well past his best. Older than most in the team now, he is in danger of being transferred to Kyleakin or Plockton, where OAPs regularly get a game. Keeps harping on about Sleat/Strath, and how he used to be so good.
Iain MacKenzie, 24, forward. Iain 'Jek' is a forward, and only forward. Once appeared on mastermind where the answer he gave to every question was shoot. i.e., greedy little bugger who never passes.
Scott Kennedy, 24, forward. 'Tottie' should have his nickname changed to 'ouch'. An up and at 'em type of player, he always seems to be on the receiving end of some particularly nasty blades of grass. Girlfriend tells us theirs something wrong in the groinal region.
Ruaridh Kennedy, 24, defender. "SHOOT ROD" come the cries at 5-a-sides. Only this is because we like to laugh at the sheer height and distance this man can hit with his left peg. "Oh No" come the shouts as we see Rod winding up for a big one on the full size pitch. Main reason why there are so many dead seagulls around the pitch.
Sam Borthwick, 24, forward/midfield. Sammy is affectionately known as 'fast-hands' due to his rugby playing. But the rest of the boys know better, ever since Val couldn't open the lingerie section in her catalogue 'cos it was all stuck together.
Nigel Grounds, **, midfield. Nige is known as the midfield general. This is because he is the only player in the team who's been around since the war, and remembers what a general is.
David Healy, **, defence? Big Davie is an unorthodox defender. He gives 110% at every game, but always seems to be the scapegoat when something goes wrong. In fact, it was his fault that we got beaten by Portree earlier in the season. A feat made more remarkable, due to Davie being in Florida at the time.
Jason Fraser, 23, forward. Jason scored his first goal against Gairloch a few years back. The last goal in a 8 - 0 win for Kyle, so the pressure was off. Not so for Jason, who, with an open goal in front of him, managed to miss the ball with his first swing of his leg, knock it into the air with his second, he finally scored with his third attempt when it went crashing into the net from 6 yards. Of his shin!
James Matheson, **, defence. 'Raxer' won't be the first to admit it, but he's getting a bit old to keep up with the youngsters. He always seems to be wearing some sort of support on his legs these days. But he's still a Kyle secret weapon though. This is because he has done his refereeing course, and with ref.’s few and far between on the mainland, we will be looking to him for the ‘odd’ penalty decision etc.!!
Donnie Wood, 19, forward/midfield. Donnie is away in college in Bedford for the start of this years campaign. Which is a good thing really, because this way he might make it till mid-season before getting injured.
Norman Finlayson, 16, defence. 'Stormy Normy' is our youngest first team starter, and made quite an impact on the league last year. Should have no problem holding down a place this year either, due to Big Bad Dave Healy coming back from the USA This means Patty has a choice of who to play in defence. Not one of his toughest decisions.
George MacInnes, 24, forward/midfield. Probably the most outstanding player on the Kyle team. Usually left ‘outstanding’ in front of the Mace Shop half an hour after everyone else has gone to the game due to an 'error' by Borthwick concerning the Kick off times.
Martin Fraser, **, midfield/defence. Rumour has it Martin will be wearing a corset this season now that he's moving back into defence and Michael's already wearing the biggest defender top available. This man will always be seen hovering around the ball at any direct free kick, wanting to take it. But is much better in defence when facing one. This is because when he goes the wall, it leaves more Kyle boys to pick up opposition players.
Colin MacIntosh, **, forward Bad Boy Mouse MacIntosh will be hoping his leg gets better this season before he can start playing again. I think he hurt himself in a mouse trap in Portree, or somewhere like that. At least this season he'll be playing with the 'Boys in Blue (and white)'
Paul Wood, **, everywhere, except goal. Paul 'gascoigne' Wood has a bit of a Jekyll and Hyde personality. One minute he's scoring wonder goals, the next he's being sent off. This is so he can be the first back in the changing rooms and then on to the pub.
