The issue of sex abuse is often difficult for families to address. Like a pond when a stone is tossed into it, the ripples affect every family member directly and in different ways. Unlike for lovers or friends, relatives are a permanent fixture in a person's life. No matter how far apart you live, or how much you both change, someone is always your son, daughter, mother, father, sister or brother. This permanence creates a bond that is special and at times, intense.
Easy responses to being told of a family member's violation can be to blame the victim or to dismiss the act. It is necessary for you to be understanding and accepting. This is hard for both of you, and by placing blame or ignoring the matter, you repress your natural emotional reaction in an attempt to protect yourself from the reality of what your family member, whom you undoubtedly love and care about greatly, has been through and the support they need from you. The best thing you can offer a survivor is your steady support and unconditional love.
Because the issues facing each family member is different, I have created separate pages addressing the different issues for the mother, father, sibling, and son or daughter.