"Hi! What ya up to?"
"Angela? Is that you? I can't believe you actually took time out of your busy schedule to call me. I feel so honored."
"Cut the sarcasm, Sand. After Friday, I'll be free and clear and you'll be WISHING I wasn't calling you."
"So, how's that shelter thing going?"
"Pretty good, I guess. It's frustrating, though. Kenneth hasn't helped at all and he's just now getting me help. We really had it out today. I swear I wanted to hit him, he pisses me off so bad."
"Wow. You're still not getting along, eh? Just hang in there until October. Then you can come down here and party your ass off with me. I miss you. Purdue ain't Purdue without you."
Angela laughed at Sandra's little rhyme, but she was too tired to stay on the subject of her return to college in the fall. "I'll just be glad once this is all over with. You know, it's a great cause and I enjoy doing it, but as organized as it's been, I just want to say 'screw it' sometimes. I wish I would've gone back with you and finished up at the start of the school year."
"Waaaaaaah. You did the right thing, Ang. You're into that kind of shit. I'm glad, too, because you pick up the slack for me." Sandra hated doing any kind of hard labor, especially for free, good cause or not. "So, how many kids will be living there, total? Have you got a number yet?"
"I don't know. I think starting out there's only going to be 2 kids. The guy's name is Jerome. He's only 15 and he's been arrested for stealing about 10 times. And he's always saying stuff just to see how far he can push it until he pisses you off. And Coco, the girl, is SO sweet, but you can tell she's homeless because she smells so bad. And it doesn't help that she's pretty heavy. It just makes her sweat more."
"So how come they're not helping?"
"I thought it would be more of a hassle than a help, you know? Jerome would drive me crazy with his attitude, and Coco's so wishy-washy she'd probably need me standing over her shoulder telling her what to do. They'll be in Thursday to check it out, though. That'll be cool. I can't wait to see their reactions."
Sandra unknowingly brought up the initial reason for the phone call during her '50 questions'. "So who's gonna be helping you? More student volunteers?"
"You see, that's why I called you. He said something about it being the Backstreet Boys, and...."
"The BACKSTREET BOYS?!" Sandra couldn't suppress her disbelief. "No WAY! They're HUGE, Angela. I mean, they're HUGE!!!!! ......I don't believe it. I would have to see it to believe it. He's pulling your leg."
"Well, he seemed pretty serious. Why would he make up such a thing?" For the first time, Angela was starting to doubt Kenneth's story. She could tell by Sandra's babbling that this truly was 'something BIG' as he had promised.
"You're so gullible! You really crack me up."
"I'm glad you enjoy me so much," Angela said before she went back to topic. "I was freaking out because I thought he was serious and I don't know anything about 'em."
"Oh, you've seen them. They were just on the MTV Video Music Awards the other night." Sandra paused as she tried to think of ways to jog Angela's memory about who they were. When she couldn't think of anything, she added, "Well, I highly doubt he got the Backstreet Boys to come to "Hicksville" Indiana to work on a house."
"Yeah......that's what I thought, but....." Sandra didn't want to sound foolish, but finished her sentence anyways. "He was serious, Sandra."
"You really believe it, don't you! You're so funny!!!" Sandra couldn't stop laughing. She'd always had a soft spot for Angela ever since she'd met her. She reminded her of Ally Sheedy in The Breakfast Club ....weird, yet funny. And after she learned her story, she understood where it all came from. Not too many kids could lose both parents and their younger brother in one shot and be shuffled around from foster home to foster home (10 different ones, to be exact) before finding one that would keep them and still be normal. Of course, she ended up fairly normal after it was all said and done, but it was a long road getting there. Kenneth and Ann were the best thing that ever happened to her, even though she and Kenneth didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things.
"Hellllloooooooo? Are you there?" Angela couldn't hide her impatience. It was 11:30 pm and she had to be up by 6 in the morning. "What songs do they do? I don't know what songs they do."
"Ummmmmm....they do that one 'you are my fire' song."
"You are my fire??? What the hell is that?"
"YOU know......" Angela cringed as Sandra started singing. It was not one of her strong points." 'You are, my fi-re, the one, desi-re'...."
"Ohhhhhhhhhh yeahhhhhhhhh.......I know that song." Angela started writing it all down, knowing she wouldn't remember if she didn't. "Anything else?"
"Oh my God, they do TONS of stuff, girl. Let me think......." Sandra sang out the next set of lyrics with confidence, too, totally unaware of how horrible she really was. " 'I don't care who you are, where you're from, what you did, as long as you love me'....."
"WOW! I know that song, too! As....Long.....As....You....Love....Me..." She repeated the words as she wrote them out. "And Sandra, don't quit your day job, okay?"
Sandra started laughing, not because of the criticism, but because she realized that Angela was writing everything down. "Angela, I hate to burst your bubble, but don't count on it really being them. I'm telling you, they're HUGE. They broke all kinds of records with their new CD and stuff. Plus, they're probably out touring or something.....like they'd take a break to work on a house....."
"Yeah, but I don't want to look stupid if it IS them. You know?"
"Whatever...."
"Sandra, stop with the 'whatever's'. I don't REALLY believe it's them. I just want to cover all the bases."
"Whatever...."
"So what do they look like? Who's their lead singer?"
Sandra was on a roll now and could barely stop laughing to even talk. "Oh, for the LOVE OF GOD! They ALL sing, you idiot!"
"You know....you don't have to make fun of me..." Angela was a little hurt at being the focus of Sandra's amusement. She didn't think it was funny that she didn't know anything about them. She thought it was funnier that Sandra knew about them at her age.
"I'm sorry, but you're killing me here. Let me get my CD cover so I can tell you their names......"
"What?!" Angela said in mock surprise. "You don't know their NAMES?"
"Hey, I ain't no groupie. I just like their music.....And their new CD is called Millennium, by the way.....that's M-I-L-L-E-N-N-I-U-M, in case you need to know how to spell it."
"Fuck You! Do you hear me? And that's with a capital F-U-C-K, in case you need to spell IT."
Sandra giggled at Angela's outburst. Far from the reaction she was fishing for. "Oh no, she's cussing. That's not GOO-OOOD."
"Screw you. Is that better?"
"That's better. I can spell that."
"Okay, Sand, tell me their names, and you have to give me a distinguishing feature about them, too. Something that will click in my mind when I see them so I can remember who's who. I don't want them to know I don't know who they are. That would probably piss them off and I wouldn't be able to get them to do anything."
Sandra focused on her mission, studying the CD cover and flipping the pages to find their names. "Okay, the first one is.........AJ."
"AJ? That's his name?"
"Yup. Well, actually it's his initials, but that's what he goes by. He looks like an 'AJ', too."
"Well.......you'll have to do better than that because I don't know what an 'AJ' looks like."
"Okay, I'm thinking.....I would just remember the word 'funky'. Yeah......funky, that's him. He's got tattoos and a goatee thang going on. He looks pretty cool."
"Tattoos and a goatee thing? That sounds GROSS to me. I thought they were a pop group." Angela wrote down "AJ/Funky - Tattoo's" in her note book.
"They are, but they're not. I don't know. I don't analyze shit. He's just funky. Pop group or not."
"Okay! Next....."
"Okay, this guy......hmmmmmm," Sandra couldn't make up her mind what to say about him. She mumbled to herself. "What would be a distinguishing feature about him........."
"Atleast tell me his name so I can write that down while you're thinking"
"Okay, his name is, let me look.....Brian."
"B-r-i-a-n," Angela repeated again as she wrote it out. "And?......."
"Well.......I don't know. He looks like a fag to me, but that's just me."
Angela burst out laughing, shocked by Sandra's blunt and uncalled for statement. "I can't write that down! Besides, what does a fag look like? Sandra, that's not very nice."
Sandra chuckled. She knew she could make Angie laugh if she tried hard enough. "I don't know. He's got these high cheek bones and flaring nostrils thing going on. He looks..., "she paused to re-evaluate her description, but couldn't find better words. "...like a fag."
"Oh, he does not."
"He does, too."
"Well, I'm not writing that down. That's too mean. And besides, I know your taste in men, so he's probably good looking to me."
".....if you like fags....."
"Screw you. He's not a fag." Angela poured on the sarcasm, laughing along with it. "He's a Backstreet Boy."
"Yeah," Sandra picked up where she left off. "Hanging in the back streets with a bunch of fags."
"Stop it! Stop!" Angela's stomach hurt from laughing so hard. "You're killing me!! I just want to know what he looks like, not what you THINK he looks like. I need facts."
"You said 'you need fags'? Well, he's the man for you." Sandra couldn't stop laughing at her own jokes.
"I'm being serious, here, Sandy. It's getting late."
"Okay...here's a better picture of him. I stand corrected. He isn't a fag, just a little on the faggy side, but.....yet....not."
"WHAT THE HELL DOES HE LOOK LIKE?!!!"
"I don't know....."
"Look, you've got a picture of him in front of you, how can you NOT know what he looks like?" Angela thought for a second, then switched her approach on getting a serious description of Brian. "Okay, suppose he mugged you or something and you had to tell the police what he looked like. What would you say?"
Angela had to hold the phone away from her ear as Sandra shouted out, " "Officer! That FAG stole my purse!" She laughed against her will and tried to stay serious so she could finish and go to bed. "Sandra, seriously, I've got to get to bed. Got a lot of work to do tomorrow."
"Okay, okay. He's got medium brown hair with an Amish haircut. Yeah, his haircut looks like a little Amish boy or something. And his eyes are blue, I think. BIG nostrils. High cheekbones. Little mouth.........[whispers].....fag."
"I'm going to tell him you called him a fag, too. IF they really show up." She was hoping that threat would shut Sandra up, but no such luck.
"I don't care. It's not like I'll ever meet him in my lifetime." There was never any intimidating Sandra. She was undefeatable in that category, especially when it was Angela trying to do the intimidating. "So, what did you write down for him, might I ask?" Sandra asked, sounded a little more serious.
"I just wrote down 'Brian/Big Nostrils'. That'll work for me."
"No fag?"
"No fag. Can we get off the fag thing now?"
"Okay, okay....next is.......ummmmmm.......... Kevin."
"Kevin?"
"Kevin."
"K-e-v-i-n. Got it. And?....."
"I got one word for him, and it's 'eyebrows.'"
"Eyebrows?!"
"Oh my God, it looks like 2 caterpillars are growing out of his forehead."
"Are you critical or what? I'm also going to show them a picture of you and have them describe YOU."
"You do that. They would call me 'hot' and wish they could get a date with me."
"In your dreams..." Angela was joking now. She'd always felt inferior to Sandra. She was a brunette, too, but funnier and prettier and....popular. Her smile and laugh could light up any room. No mistaking that. And yet she'd been her friend from the moment they met. It never made sense to Angela how a popular girl would hang out with a newcomer who was far from her then-current friends and eventually even choose her over the popular ones.....Not that she was bad looking, maybe just average compared to Sandra, and not near as humorous. She never really got asked out a lot because the guys were always hitting on Sandy, but yet she was never jealous of her. She was shy anyways and was almost relieved that the guys left her alone. It was too much pressure for her to even think about caring about someone like that.
"Helloooooo? I thought you were in a hurry.....so what did you put down for Kevin?"
"Oh, I put down 'Kevin/Eyebrow Man'."
"Couldn't have put it better myself. You sound like you're getting tired. I'll hurry."
"Okay....who's next."
"Next....is......His name is Howie."
"Howie?" Angela giggled. "That's so dorky."
"Oh, Howie ain't dorky, honey, you know what I'm sayin'? DO NOT - I repeat - DO NOT put 'dorky' by his name."
"So he's the good looking one?"
"It's his eyes. He's got killer eyes. Big, brown, beeyootiful eyes."
"So he's the hot one?"
"I don't know. Seriously, they're all good looking in their own way. It would just depend what mood you're in, ya know?" That made Angela feel a little bit better. She was dreading meeting them because Sandy was making them all sound incredibly ugly.
"I put down 'Killer eyes' for Howie. What color are they, again?"
"They're brown. He looks Mexican, Spanish, or something like that. Ricky Martin can eat his Puerto Rican heart out. Howie's 10 times better looking than Ricky."
"I HATE Ricky Martin. Now, HE's a fag." Angela had heard "Livin' La Vida Loca" one time too many. Talk about over-saturation. And when she'd seen him on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine with a bunch of naked women around him it turned her stomach. "What a pig."
"Okay, you've established your Ricky Martin opinion before. I happen to like him." Sandra always got defensive when it came to Ricky Martin, so Angela was surprised when she made the next statement. "But I would pick Howie over him anyday."
"What, you don't want 'the fag'?"
"Over Ricky Martin? Hell, no! I'd do 'im, though. What the hell, he's got money."
Angela scoffed at Sandra's shallow remark. "You know, you really nauseate me when you say stuff like that, Sandra."
"Sorry, I was just joking. Geesh, chill out already!"
Angela yawned into the phone, hoping it would prompt Sandra to hurry up. "Who's the last guy? I've only got four written down so far."
"Nick. Nick Car-ter. Wooooo hoooo! He's a cutie. He looks like your type, too: Virginal." Sandra laughed at her own joke (again).
"Very funny. You know, you don't KNOW that I'm a virgin."
"Well, seeing how you've never been out on a real date, I would say that's a pretty accurate guess," Sandra pointed out matter of factly, knowing that Angela hated it when she brought this topic up.
"My sex life is none of your business."
"Hey, calm down. I think it's cool that you're a virgin." Sandra cackled as she prepared for her next wise crack. "Besides, it would make a great line for this guy." She turned her voice to a seductive tone. "Oh, yeah, baby, I want YOU to be my first."
"Fuck off. I'm hanging up. I don't give a fuck who the fuck he is....and YOU can kiss my ass."
"Hey," Sandra backed off, realizing that she'd really went too far. "I'm sorry. Really. I didn't mean to piss you off, I was just having a little fun at your expense. I'm sorry, okay? Calm down."
Angela forgave her reluctantly, like she always did. "Okay. So what's he look like? BESIDES 'virginal'!"
"He's.........Adorable"
"That's not cuttin' it, Sandra. What color's his hair?"
"Adorable."
"I'm serious. Hair color, eye color, SOMETHING."
"Adorable."
"Sandra, stop it, okay? I want to go to bed."
"Adorable."
"Fine. I'll put adorable. 'Nick/Adorable', are you happy?"
"Yes. And did I say that he's adorable???"
"Yes, you said that."
"Good. Cos he is."
"Whatever...I'm going to bed now. Take care, and I'll call you tomorrow and let you know what happened."
"Cool. Don't be to upset if he lied to you. I think Kenneth's lying."
"I won't. Good night."
"'Nite".
Angela hung up the phone and looked over her notes. She wondered if she would still really know a Backstreet Boy if she saw one. Adorable? Hmmmmmm.....adorable.....that would be cool.....and he must be a blond.
Sandra knew she had a weakness for blonds. A smile was on her face and she didn't even realize it. She was really looking forward to the next day. For once, Kenneth had done something right.........if he was being truthful.
Chapter Three
Chapter One
Story Index
