The next day, counseling was scheduled for AJ. They only had two days left in NYC, but the sooner AJ started counseling, the sooner he would recover. They had recommended that only AJ would be there, and for Brian to pick him up when they called.
So Brian sat by the phone and waited. Waiting, waiting. Ring, he urged it every once in a while. It never did. The door to the room opened. Brian's eyes and hand never left the phone.
"Hey Bri," Howie greeted softly.
"Hey."
"I...I'm sorry. About everything."
"No," Brian said. "None of this is your fault."
"Yes it is...I was too busy with being famous to see it. It was so obvious. The things he did, the things he said."
"Don't think about it, Howie...it's everybody's fault."
"Bri, you need to eat something."
"I can't. The phone might ring and I need to be here."
"I'll stay here. Go get something from the cafe thing downstairs. I'll answer the phone if it rings."
Brian looked at Howie, then slowly, ever-so-slowly, stood and walked out of the room. Howie sat in the chair and waited. A few minutes later, Brian came back with a cup of coffee and a donut.
"Did it ring?" he asked. Howie shook his head.
"No," he said.
"Oh."
Howie moved from Brian's seat. Brian sat in it and the two sat in silence. Both jumped when the phone rang.
"Hello?" Brian asked. "Yeah....no. No! I'm sure. No. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Bye."
"Was it....them?" Howie asked.
"Yeah," Brian said. "I'm gonna go get him. See you when we get back."
Howie nodded. "See you."
Brian walked out the door after grabbing his keys. He drove to the building where AJ was getting counselled, pulled in the parking lot, and walked inside. He spotted AJ, who was sitting on a bench, looking like he could die.
"Hey AJ," Brian said quietly after he'd walked over to him.
"Hey," AJ grumbled as he stood. They two walked out of the building and got into the car. The two sat silently as Brian drove.
"What I wouldn't give for a shroom or two," AJ muttered, breaking the silence. "Acid would be nice...hell, I'd even take some coke right now. You know how much this is killing me?"
"You don't know how much it's killing me," Brian said.
"Why would it be hurting you, you're not the one who's going through this withdrawal that has to last forever. Your blood doesn't itch and cry because it wants some of it's love. Drugs were my lover, my escape. Now everyone's taking my love away."
"It kills me because you sit there and talk about it like it's nothing. Like it's okay that you're doing them. It isn't okay AJ. And you don't know how crazy me, Howie, Brianna, Kevin, and Nick have been. I didn't get a wink of sleep last night, and you got, oh, I'd say about twelve hours."
AJ sighed and the conversation dropped. He scratched his arm; it missed the prick of the needle. His tongue missed the weight of the tablets and pills. His nose missed the feeling that he was going to sneeze that snorting gave him. He missed his drugs.
Chapter 18
