**Pyros go off and Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, and Joel Gertner make their way to the ring to call the ppv.**

JR: "Welcome everyone to the first ever EHW Original King of the DeathMatches! I am Jim Ross along with Jerry Lawler and. . "

JG: "And he was about to hand it over to the host of the ppv. Joel 'the man who used an entire condom filla. . and it tasted like vanilla! And the man who last night split your 42 year old mother in half, and stuck it to her like she was a pair of 21 year old twins.' Gertner"

JL: "Hey that was prett good, but your were talking about Rosses mother right?"

JG: "Of course not, JR's mom is so old her p*ssy has mice."

JR: "That is it, I am going to kill you Gertner, come here"

**Ross goes after Gertner but Lawler holds him back and reminds him that he has a job to do.**

JL: "While these two calm down, lets head down to the ring. For our first match, which is a semifinal round tournament match."

**Ring crew sets up a pole in the corner of the ring and places a barb wire bat a top it then places a long casket like length and deepness box in the middle of the ring and fills it with 10,000 thumbtacks. Then, Kanyon's music hits and he comes out to the ring. He gets in the ring and poses for the cameras to the crowds boos.**

Bret Hart's music comes on and he comes out to the ring to the applause of the fans. He gets in the ring and poses for the crowd and gets cheered some more and the match is set to begin.**

Both men go face to face looking at the box of thumbtacks below them. Bret kicks it aside and nails Kanyon with a hard right hand. He nails him with another one and knocks Kanyon down, Bret picks him up and gives him a running bulldog. Bret Hart goes to climb the ropes to get the barb wire bat, he gets up their but then Kanyon nails him from behind and lifts Bret on his shoulders and gives him a reverse powerbomb. Kanyon climbs up to the top and grabs the bat, he gets down and takes a swing at Bret with it. .but Bret ducks. Kanyon loses the bat turns around and Bret gives him a side back breaker, Bret goes to the second rope and legdrops Kanyon off the second rope. Bret picks Kanyon up to slam him into the box of tacks, but Kanyon ducks out of it and goes for a Flatliner! But Bret blocks it and gives Kanyon a headbutt that knocks him down but Bret grabs his legs. BRET GIVES KANYON A SLIGSHOT INTO THE BOX OF THUMBTACKS!! Bret wins.

JR: "Good God! Kanyon went face and chest first into that huge box of thumbtacks! That had to of hurt."

JL: "You are telling me, Kanyon had to be in the ring with that unhygenic canadian Bret Hart, phew."

JG: "Well, the medics are coming to get Kanyon, they'll earn their money tonight I can tell you that much."

**Kanyon is brought out of the ring and the upper front side of his body is almost completely silver from thumbtacks jamed into his flesh.**

**HHH's music hits and he comes out to the ring with Chyna. He gets in the ring and poses for the crowd.

The British Bulldog's music hits and he comes out to the ring. He gets in the ring and gets ready for the match to begin.**

JR: "Remember this is a 2 out of 3 Falls Match which I now understand has also been made a weapons match to top that off."

Chyna goes underneath the ring, takes out a garbage can filled with weapons, and both men go at it. HHH strikes first with a running high knee to Bulldogs face that knocks him down. HHH goes into the weapons and takes out a steel chair, he waits for Bulldog to get up and nails him with the chair over the head. HHH goes and gets a skateboard, he goes to nail Bulldog with the skateboard but the Bulldog leg sweeps HHH down to the mat, HHH gets back to his feet and the Bulldog picks him up and hits a running powerslam on the garbage can filled with weapons. 1.2..3! Bulldog wins the first fall. HHH gets 10 seconds to get back to his feet which he finally does, Bulldog runs at him with a tv monitor in his hands and HHH does a drop toe hold on the Bulldog drops head first onto the monitor and is knocked out. 1..2.3! HHH wins the second fall, and the Bulldog is given 10 seconds to get back up to his feet as well. He does and him and HHH lock up again, Bulldog gives HHH a hanging suplex and HHH is slow to his feet. Bulldog climbs to the top rope with a cookie sheet in his hands he jumps and nails HHH with the cookie sheet right over the head. 1.2.NO! Chyna grabs Bulldog's foot and drags him to the outside, Bulldog looks at the crowd then punches Chyna out cold. He gets back in the ring but as he does HHH nails him with guitar over the neck and back. Then HHH his The Pedigree! 1..2..3! HHH wins.

JR: "HHH wins with the help of Chyna. I better get used to saying that."

JL: "Chyna was just checking to see if Bulldog was laced properly."

JG: "Are you two blind, Chyna has been knocked out, I better give her mouth to mouth resesitation. Except I use my toungue!"

**Ring Crew puts up another barb wire bat and another huge box of 10,000 thumbtacks in the ring as Test's music hits. He gets in the ring and poses for the crowd on the second rope.

Enter Sandman by Metallica plays and The Sandman comes to the ring through the crowd. He gets in the ring and drinks a beer and he and Test go at it.**

Sandman cains Test between the eyes and right off the bat gives him a spinning kneck breaker. He picks Test up and cains Test in the stomach and in the back, then he throws Test to the outside of the ring. Sandman goes to the outside and pulls out a table, he sets it up on the ring and the guard rail and lays Test on it. He gets back in the ring runs off the rope and jumps over the top rope. . but Test moves and The Sandman crashes through the table. Test climbs back in the ring and grabs the barb wire bat, he waits for the Sandman to get back in the ring and then nails him with it in his back! He rips it off Sandman's back and nails him with it right between Sandman's eyes! Sandman falls to the mat and Test goes up to the top rope, he leaps and nails and elbow drop off the top rope. He waits a few seconds to pose yell at a few fans at ringside, then picks up The Sandman to put him in the box of thumbtacks. As he is dragging The Sandman over Sandman grabs the cain and uses it to nail a low blow on Test. Sandman hits Test with a Singapore Legsweep into the box of thumbtacks!!! Sandman wins.

JL: "That drunken idiot The Sandman is moving on to the final round of the tournament?? Ahhh!"

JG: "Hey Lawler, you hate both Hart and Sandman, who are you going to root for??"

JL & JR: "SHUT UP GERTNER!"

**Spotlights in the arena show a gravesite by the entryway and a casket at ringside. The lights go out, Seek and Destroy by Metallica hits, and Sting comes out to the ring. He gets in the ring and yells out to his fans at ringside.

The lights go out and Vampiro comes out to the ring. He gets in the ring and Sting attacks him right away.**

Sting punches him down and kicks him down in the corner of the ring. Sting picks him up and whips Vampiro to the other corner, runs at him, and. . hits a Stinger Splash. He goes back, and hits another one, goes back again and. . Vampiro ducks and Sting crashes in the corner! Vampiro is slow to his feet but when he gets to his feet he whips Sting off the ropes and gives him a spinebuster. He picks Sting up and goes for the Nail in the Coffin, but Sting wiggles out of it and hits the Scorpion Death Drop! Sting pushes Vampiro and puts him in the casket. He starts pushing the casket towards the grave site, he gets up to the dirt pile but then the door shoots up and nails Sting in the face. Vampiro gets up and hits a jumping spinning cresent kick on Sting out of the casket. He positions the casket near the dirt pile then Vampiro takes Sting up to the top of the pile and. . .NAIL IN THE COFFIN OFF THE DIRT PILE THROUGH THE CASKET!!!!

JR: "Good God Almighty! Good God Almighty! Good God Almighty! That dirt pile is about 10 feet in the air!"

JL: "He might have just ended Sting's carreer with that move! Ahh!"

The casket has been broken to pieces after the move, so Vampiro takes Sting's limp body and dumps him in the grave site and buries him in dirt!! Vampiro wins!

JG: "That was one of the most incredible moves I have ever seen! And I've seen the Pamela/Tommy Lee Video 5 times!"

JR: "That match will be hard to top but our next match is a 4 Way Dance for the World Title. If that isn't hard enough it will be a Barb Wire Lumberjack match on top of that."

**Ring Crew replaces the ropes with long strands of barb wire and doubles up on it so it stays on. Then lumberjacks start coming out to the ring. Al Snow, Hardcore Holly, HHH, Test, Kanyon, Vampiro, Scott Steiner, Saturn, Kronus, Konnan, Jeff Jarrett, Matt Hardy, Jeff Hardy, DDP, Disco Inferno, and Chris Beniot all come out to the ring and surround the barb wire roped ring.**

**The lights go out and The Undertaker' music comes on and the Undertaker comes out to the ring. He gets in the ring and shots up his arms as pyros go off and the lights come back on. HBK's music hits and Shawn Michaels comes out to the ring as the women in the crowd go wild. He gets in the ring and poses for the fans and the camera. NWO 2000's music comes on and Ric Flair comes out to the ring as pyros go off. He gets in the ring and stands in the corner taking off his robe. Finally, Sid's music hits and the world champion comes out to the ring. He gets in the ring and gives the belt to the ref as the fans chant him on.**

All four men are careful not to get tangled in the barb wire, in the middle of the ring Flair and Sid start going at it in a fist fight. At the same time, HBK and Undertaker start brawling and HBK dropkicks the Undertaker into the barb wire! Flair goes for a chop on Sid but Sid ducks and gives Flair a chokeslam! HBK goes for Sweet Chin Music on Sid but Sid ducks and goes to put HBK in the powerbomb, right before he lifts him up Undertaker grabs Sid by the hair from behind and gives Sid a reverse suplex. When Undertaker is about to capatilze from behind Michaels hits a side suplex driving him into the mat. He goes for a cover 1..2.Flair interupts the count by hitting a knee drop on the back of HBK's head. Flair picks HBK up and gives him a knee breaker, then he follows it up with a Figure Four! He locks it in, but just after applying it Sid hits a big leg drop on Flair and he releases the hold. Sid hits a big boot on HBK and Michaels goes into the barb wire bare back first! Then Sid and the Undertaker pick Flair up and give him double chokeslam! 1..2..3! Ric Flair is eliminated!

JR: "The former world champion is gone. Tough break for the legend."

Sid and Undertaker shake hands and then Undertaker clotheslines Sid down to the mat. Undertaker sees HBK in the barb wire ropes, runs straight at him and, clotheslines him over the barb wire ropes into the lumberjacks. The lumberjacks start kicking HBK while he is down, Jarrett picks him up and gives him The Stroke! The Undertaker back in the ring gets a running start, jumps, and does a Swanton Bomb into the lumberjacks!! Undertaker gets up and punches the lumberjacks he didn't take out down on their asses. He takes HBK and slides him back in the ring and HBK scrapes his back some more on the barb wire ropes. Undertaker gets back on the mat and Sid hit Taker with a guillotine on the barb wire ropes. The Undertaker's throat starts gushing blood!

JG: "He may have just ripped his juggular!"

Sid brings him in the ring, he stands him in the center of the ring and when HBK gets up. . Sweet Chin Music!! 1.2..3! Undertaker is eliminated.

JL: "It is down to HBK and Sid."

JG: "Good observation Burger King."

Both Sid and HBK are fatigued and struggle to get back up to their feet Sid hits HBK with a few right hands that are weakly thrown, HBK answers with a hard shove and Sid goes and trips into the barb wire ropes! The bloods starts leaking from Sid's back as he is still tangled in the barb wire. HBK pulls Sid out of the ropes and gives him a spike piledriver, 1..2..NO! Sid somehow kicks out! HBK climbs up to the post of the turnbuckle, he points to the sky, leaps, and misses an elbow drop off the top rope! Sid moves out of the way. . . . . . neither man can get to his feet, Sid finally does HBK gets up and Sid puts him down and POWERBOMB INTO THE BARB WIRE!!! Sid does a diving powerbomb into the barb wire ropes which snap off, but he hooks his finger. He lifts HBK up again and hits a POWERBOMB! 1...2..3! Sid wins.

JR: "By some miracle Sid has retained his EHW World Heavyweight Championship! I don't believe it!"

JL: "I am impressed by that and Sid deserves all of our respect. But so does everyone else that was in that match."

JG: "Did you see that move at the end?!! He powerbombed HBK into the barb wire ropes which snapped and stuck to HBK's back. Then Sid using brute stregnth picked up HBK and gave him another powerbomb with the barb wire still stuck in HBK's back! That is extreme!"

**The barb wire ropes are but back up with even more barb wire, and a barb wire wrapped wooden board laced with C4 Explosives on the back is put in a corner of the ring.**

**Bret Hart's music once again hits and he comes out to the ring to a fair ovation. He gets in the ring still looking fatigued and yells to his fans.

Enter Sandman by Metallica comes on again and The Sandman again comes out through the crowd. He drinks a beer with fans at ringside and goes to the ring. He gets in the ring carefully and stands in a corner staring at Bret.**

Bret and Sandman go face to face in the center of the ring and start trash talking. Sandman looks away then goes to cain Bret but Bret ducks, grabs Sandman from behind and gives him a russian legsweep. Bret picks the Sandman up and whips him as hard as he can into the barb wire! Sandman hits so hard that he bounces off the barb wire, though the back of his shirt is all torn up. Bret goes into the corner where the explosion board is and brings it into the center of the ring. He picks Sandman up and goes to powerbomb him into it, but when Bret lifts him up and Sandman punches his way out of it, gives Bret a sidewalk slam. The Sandman repositions the explosion board in the corner and hits a running elbow drop on Hart while he is down. Sandman picks Bret up goes for a suplex but Bret blocks it and gives Sandman a jaw breaker. Bret has ring crew put two chairs in the ring, Bret opens both of them and puts them in the corner. Bret picks the Sandman up and gives him a side back breaker, he stands on the chairs and drives the elbow into Sandman skull! Bret goes for a cover but the ref reminds him that the way to win is to put your opponent through the explosion board then make the pin. Bret picks Sandman up and goes to throw him into the board but the Sandman is almost dead weight and Bret can't lift him up. Bret takes a few steps back and looks at the crowd frustrated, he goes to pick Sandman up again but Sandman shoots to his feet, kicks Bret in the stomach and hits a swingback DDT. Both men are down. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . finally both men get back to their feet at the same time, Sandman gets up with the cain in his hand Bret hits Sandman with a right hand and Sandman falls back off the barb wire ropes, Bret goes for a hard right hand and Sandman moves and cains Bret in the head knocking Bret into the barb wire ropes! He pulls Bret out near the corner and. . HITS A SPINNING SINGAPORE LEGSWEEP ON THE EXPLOSIONS BOARD!!!!!!

BOOM!!!!!!

Bret Hart goes through the Explosion Board!!!!!!!!!!!!! The smoke clears and Sandman covers him, 1..2...3! Sandman wins.

JR: "Bret Hart may be dead!!! Someone get some medical attention in here! Now damnit!"

JL: "He may be seriously hurt, this could be carreer ending."

JG: "Gee, I remember when the Sandman won the King of the DeathMatches tournament. Don't either of you!"

JR: "Yes, you are actually right, The Sandman deserves credit and he will be going to Cyberslam 2000 to fight for the EHW World Title."

JL: "Yeah, but Sandman will be around for his shot, Bret Hart might be on his way to see Owen."

**Medics come in and dump Bret Hart with cold water then take him to a hospital in an ambulance.**

JR: "This has been one hell of a night. Don't foget to join us for our next PPV Cyberslam! Good Night everybody!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Wrestler of the Night: The Sandman ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~