copyright 1987-1998 by Conner McBride

DISCLAIMER:  (but I don't even know her! :)  Any and all characters belong to their respective creators at MTM, Shoot the Moon Productions, Warner Brothers, and Babylonian Productions.  No copyright infringement is intended.  Please don't sue.  It's not like I have money anyway.

NOTE FROM AUTHOR:  This story was originally written in 1987 as a RS/SMK crossover by said author at the age of twelve after both shows had been cancelled.  Lee and Laura just struck me as kindred souls.   Obviously, said author has revamped the story since then.  Cut to 1998.  What can I say?  I had to add the other show into the mix because Bruce has done the finest work of his career on it.  On that note, I would also like to add my immense thanks to J. Michael Straczynski for creating the greatest love story I have ever seen, not to mention Bruce and Mira for being two damn fine actors.

Dedicated to Susan (my very nice buddy who cheerfully puts up with my B5 obsession), Pat and Nancy, who write RS fanfic faster than a speeding bullet (how do you two do it?), and Jenny, who shares my Bruce Boxleitner obsession and who has also drooled over this space cowboy since TRON and SMK (Doesn't he look delish in an AOL uniform, Jen? ;)

<ending long-winded speech>  On with the story!  Whew!

      ***

 Lee Stetson gritted his teeth in aggravation.  Ever since Billy had come up with the grand idea of making Amanda King a partner-in-training for him, his-well ordered life had been turned upside down.  Today had been no different.
 He unlocked the door of his apartment and threw his mail on the counter before pulling out an ice-cold beer.  Kicking his shoes off and flopping on the couch, Lee flipped through the pile of mail.  Bill, bill, magazine, ad, bill, what the?
 Flipping over the blue envelope, he read the return address.
 "Well where the hell have you been hidin', stranger?"
 Chuckling, he opened the envelope, finding a birthday card.  Truly a card that only she could pick.  Lee grinned as he read the message written out in her unique left-handers' script.
 
 Lee, it's your birthday!  Time to salute Father Time...of course, which finger you salute him with is your business.  What do I care?  I'm not there!  Happy Birthday!
     All my love,
      Laurie

     Lee smiled.  Only Laura could have such a deadpan response to getting older.  Sighing, he picked up the picture on the table, one of the few he kept lying around.  There she was, hugging him and looking oh-so-proud in her crimson and navy letterman's jacket.  Long brown hair and all arms and legs, as only sixteen could look.
     He kept up with her exploits and had seen pictures of her and "Steele" in the LA Times.  She had done good for herself.  He was proud of her.  Lee sat back.
It had been a while since he had seen her---about seven years.  /I'm horrible at keeping in touch./  "Ah, what the hell?"
     They had finished their stakeout, he hadn't taken a vacation in three years, there was nothing pressing, and Billy was always on his butt to take some time off.  Why shouldn't he?
  Picking up the phone, he dialed Delta.  "Hello?  Yeah.  I'd like to book a first-class flight to Los Angeles.  Round-trip.  Yeah, I'll hold."

      ***

     Mildred went through her file cabinet for what seemed like the tenth time.
     "Alright!  I know I saw ya in here somewhere!"
     "Who are you talking to Mildred?"
     Startled, the resident mother-hen of Remington Steele Investigations whirled around to meet a pair of sparkling blue eyes.
     "Boss, that's not funny!  You coulda given me a heart attack!"
     Steele had the good grace to chastised...almost.  "Sorry darlin'.  Now, what were you looking for?"
     The portly woman gave a kick to the file cabinet.  "The Mackland file.  I know I put it in here."
     Remington shrugged, patting Mildred on the shoulder.  "Mildred, Mildred, you'll find it.  It's probably on Miss Holt's desk.  You know how Laura likes to make sure she's caught everything."
     Mildred exhaled in annoyance.  "Well, I guess it'll turn up."
     "Of course it will.  Now," he pushed Mildred back towards her desk.  "Don't worry about it.  I'll go see if Laura has it."
     Straightening his tie, the handsome Irishman strode towards the smaller office where the work actually got done.
     "Hey boss."
     Remington turned around, a mischievious twinkle in those sapphire eyes.  "Yes?"
     Mildred grinned, knowing how hard it was for these two kids to keep their hands off of each other when they were alone.  "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."
     Winking, Steele said, "What you don't know, Mildred, can't hurt you.  Later luv."

      ***

     Laura took a sip of coffee, her eyes never leaving the report.  Apparently Jena Mackland had skipped town to Denver.  Maybe Murphy would do a little scouting for them, since it was his neck of the woods she was in.  Laura heard her door open.  Looking up, she broke into a smile.
    "Why Mr. Steele, what can I do for you?"  Her amber eyes sparkled with their own particular wicked humor.
     "Nothing you can do for me, Miss Holt.  However," he pulled her out of her chair, pulling her against him.  "There are a few things I would like you to do to me." Remington grinned suggestively. Laura wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him lightly on the mouth.  "And I would love to oblige you---later!"
 She wiggled out of his grasp.  "I have to make a call to Murph and see if he'll do a little takeover of this case."
     Remington leaned over her.  It was the Mackland file Mildred had been looking for.  "Why?"
 She looked up at him.  "Jena Mackland skipped town about a week ago.  Her housekeeper says she went to Denver."
 He massaged her shoulders, dropping a kiss on the top of her head.  "Would Murphy be willing?"
 Laura shrugged.  "Sure.  And we'll cover for him if one of his suspects skips to this area."
     Remington released her, picking up the file.  "Call him and I'll give this back to Mildred, who, by the way, has made it quite clear that she really does not appreciate people invading her file cabinets."
 Giggling, Laura said, "Extend my apologies."
 His charming grin only made her laugh harder.  "Later luv."

      ***

     Mildred eyed the guy standing in front of her.  Boy, was this one nice looking! In his khaki chinos and leather jacket, he would give the Boss a run for his money.  /Okay, that's pushing it./  He turned a dazzling-smile in her direction.  /Then, again, maybe not./
     "What can I do for you, Mr.-"
 He offered his hand.  "Stetson, Lee Stetson."
     "Mildred, m'darlin'.  I told you Laura had the file."  He dropped the manila folder on the secretary's desk.  Seeing the tall, sandy-haired man in front of him, Remington poured on his usual business charm.  "Ah.  So sorry.  I didn't know anyone was out here, Mr?"
 "Lee Stetson."  The man shook his offered hand.  "So you're Remington Steele."
 Mildred watched as the Boss turned on the charm.  "That I am.  Now, how may we be of service to you?"
 His hazel eyes gleaming, Lee Stetson smirked.  "Actually, I'm here to see Laura Holt."
 "Really?"  Remington arched his eyebrow.  Mildred recognized his jealousy radar going on in full attack mode.  Apparently Lee Stetson didn't.  "Yeah.  It's been a while since I've seen her, so I thought I'd get down here and surprise her."
     Remington laughed mirthlessly, studying him.  Lee Stetson was the picture of the all-American cowboy, the type women would consider rugged, a jock, like Murphy.  Except for one thing.  He had an enormous amount of elan and dashing (smarmy, thought Remington) charm and savoir-faire.  How did he know Laura?  Warning bells were going off in Remington's head at an alarming rate.
     Lee Stetson cleared his throat.  "Well, could you tell her I'm here, but," he grinned at Mildred conspiratorily, "don't tell her who it is.  I really want to surprise her."
 Wide-eyed, Mildred gave Mr. Steele a look, who nodded his permission.  Remington Steele crossed his arms, his lips pursed together in anger.  Who was this man who apparently knew Laura so intimately and yet, she had never bothered to mention Lee Stetson to him?  Steele chose at this moment to conveinently forget the fact that he had never really been forthcoming with his less-than-stellar past.
     Mildred hit the intercom button.  "Miss Holt?"
 "Yes Mildred?"
 "Sorry to disturb you, but there's a gentleman here who wants to see you."
 An annoyed pause.  They heard Laura give a sigh.  "Mildred, I'm hip-deep in the middle of something.  Can't Mr. Steele see him?"
 "Uh--"  Mildred looked at Lee Stetson, who was doing his damndest not to laugh.
     Remington Steele was tempted to Stetson to bugger off since Laura was so busy.  After all, he was the boss, so to speak.  He almost smiled at that thought.  However, he was more than a wee bit curious to see how Laura knew this chap.  He pressed the intercom again.  "I'm afraid he's rather insistent, Laura."
 Another pause.  "Alright.  I'm coming."
     He faced Lee Stetson.  "Would you like to sit down?"  /Politeness old chap.  Maybe he's just a cousin./
 "No thanks."  Lee leaned against Mildred's desk, flashing her a dazzling smile.  Mildred looked like she was about to melt.  Remington gritted his teeth.
 Laura's door opened.  Lee stood up.
 "Now, how can I help---LEE!"
     Laura let out a shriek, throwing her arms around Lee Stetson's neck.  He laughed, twirling her around, hugging her so hard he lifted her tiny frame off the ground.
 Steele's eyes widened.  Mildred gave a gasp.  Lee Stetson had planted a kiss squarely on Laura's mouth; Remington noticed she didn't exactly push him away.
 He felt Mildred's hand on his arm.  /Icy calm, Icy calm./  He heard Laura chattering away.
     "When did you get here?  Why didn't you call---I would have met you!  What are you doing here?"  This Laura was bouncing up and down like an excited child.
 /And blushing like a lovestruck adolescent/ Remington thought sourly.
     Lee snickered.  "Are you sure you can get a breath in there somewhere, Spitfire?"
 Laura blushed again, punching his arm lightly.  Remington cleared his throat.
 "Eh, we're going to assume you two have known each other for a while?"
 The petite brunette nodded, linking her arm through Stetson's.  "Mr. Steele, Mildred, this is Lee Stetson.  He's one of my oldest friends.  I haven't seen him in about-oh-seven years."
 Remington nodded.  "We've met."
 Lee draped an arm around Laura.  "The reason I'm here is because I figured it was about time to say hi again."
 Laura giggled, planting a kiss on his cheek.  "Well, I'm glad you did."
 "And I also figured I'd take you out to lunch, assuming Mr. Steele can spare you around here."
     Remington didn't like the way Stetson smirked when he said his name.  He saw Laura raise her eyebrow slightly.  It wouldn't bode well for him if he refused.  He shrugged.  "By all means.  Apparently you two have a lot to catch up on.  In fact Laura, why don't you take the rest of the day off?"  He was aware of her look.  He hadn't meant to sound so cold.
 Mildred stared at him incredulously, unable to believe the Boss was literally handing over Laura on a silver platter to obvious competition.  Remington, for his part, was absolutely sure his workaholic Laura wouldn't take the day off.  He was wrong.
 "Okay.  Hang on Lee and let me get my purse."
     She started to walk towards her office before turning around.  "Mr. Steele, could I see you in my office?  There are some aspects of a case I want to show you before I leave.  This will only take a sec, Lee."
 Lee Stetson waved his hand dismissively.  "Take your time Laurie."
 Laura flashed him a smile before turning back to Remington.  "Mr. Steele?"
 Remington heard the unspoken part of the statement.  /Get in that office before I rip your lungs out./
 He followed her into her office.  Locking the door, Laura turned around.
     "Alright Mr. Steele, give.  What's wrong?"
 Remington assumed an air of loftiness.  "Whatever do you mean Laura?"
 "Don't give me that!  You just tried to bite my head off out there and you're casing Lee like he's Descoine's younger brother."
 Steele sighed.  "Laura, you're exaggerating."
 She walked up to him, forcing him to look at her.  "No I'm not.  What the hell is going on?"
 Remington looked at her, his blue eyes narrowed in anger.  "Who is he Laura?  An attempt to make me jealous?  Because if that's what it is, it's rather immature on your part."
     "An attempt--hold it Jack!"  Laura pushed him away from her, her gunpowder temper flaring.  "First of all, if I wanted to make you jealous, you'd know it!  Secondly, I don't feel the need to explain who Lee is to you, but for the record, you can relax!  He's a very old friend, practically a brother!"
 She started to walk out.  Remington grabbed her by the arm.  "Practically a brother?  Is that what you call someone who attempts to grope you in public?"
 The smack echoed in the room.  Remington stared at Laura, unbelieving of what she had done.  Maybe he had been out of line with that comment, but dammit, she had been pushing him away for weeks!  His anger flared up again.  "Hit a nerve, did we?"
 Laura bit her lip, trying not to say or do anything else she'd regret.  "Look, I'm cutting out of here for the rest of the day and I'm taking tomorrow off.  When you start acting like an adult, give me a call."
 Walking out the door, she composed herself.  Lee knew her like a book.  "Let's go Lee."
     Remington heard them exit the office.  "Damn!"  He punched the file cabinet.  He hadn't meant to say that, it had just come out.  Why were things so difficult between them lately?
 Mildred decided to ignore the bang in Laura's office.  Somehow, she didn't think this would be a very good time for inquiring.  Not that she wasn't curious about Laura leaving with Mr. G.Q.

      ***

     "So what have you been up to, Lee?"
 He took a sip of wine, chuckling at her evil grin.  "Okay Laura.  What are you driving at?"
 Laura sat back in her chair, shaking her head.  "Oh c'mon Lee!  Last call I got from you, you were complaining about the new civvy partner you had."
 Lee rolled his eyes.  "Please!  Spare me."  He shrugged his shoulders in aggravation.  "She's a housewife who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time."
 Eating a bit of salad, Laura snickered.  "So what are your new assignments?  Staking out the PTA?"
     He punched her arm lightly.  "What about you Spitfire?"
 Laura grimaced.  "Lord.  I can't believe you still call me that."
 "It's what I've called you since you were a kid.  You always had a temper."
 Laughing, Laura nodded.  "I was a rotten kid, huh?"
 Lee shook his head, signaling the waiter over.  "Nah.  I always liked having my little shadow around when I spent the summers here."
     The waiter brought the check around.  Lee slapped Laura's hand as she reached for it.  "Not a chance.  Keep your little paws off."
 "Lee, c'mon!  You're on vacation, let me pick up the tab."
 "No way.  Now shut up and let me be a sexist pig and pay for you."
     Laura groaned in mock frustration, secretly pleased to see the old big-brother attitude Lee was still there.  He had sounded so pent-up these past few years.
 These last few months, though, he had gone back to the boyish, all-American football player she had had a childhood crush on.  She was glad.  He was too nice a guy for it to be any other way; and ten bucks said that civilian housewife he swore aggravated the hell out of him was the reason.
     "What the hell are you smiling at?"
 "Huh?"  Laura was pulled out of her thoughts.  "Pardon?"
 "You look like the cat who swallowed the canary."
 Laura couldn't help herself.  She really couldn't.  "So how long have you had this crush on your partner?"
 The look on Lee's face was priceless.  Extreme paranoia was how Laura would have described it.  "Crush on--Amanda?!"
 "Oh, so her name is Amanda."
 "Yes!  No!  I do not have a crush on her!"
 "Uh-huh."
 "Listen Laura-"
 Their friendly bickering continued all the way to the car.

      ***

     "Hey Boss!  I picked you up a sandwich."  Mildred placed a bag on Steele's desk.  "Leo said he put extra pastrami on it too."
 "Thank you Mildred."
     Mildred made herself comfortable on the chair by the wall, kicking her feet up on the coffee table.  Mr. Steele had been brooding for the better part of the afternoon.
 "Say Mr. Steele, you okay?"
 He turned in his chair to face her.  "I am fine Mildred.  Just a little annoyed at Miss Holt right now."
 "Or at that guy who's wining and dining her right now."
 He glared at her.  "Who Miss Holt chooses to associate with ,Midred, is her own business and none of my concern."
 Mildred took another bite of her sandwich.  "Uh huh.  And I'm the Queen of England.  C'mon Boss, I know you two got something going.  Why don't you just admit it?  You're jealous."
 "I am most certainly not!"  He tried to put on a show of indigantion...which Mildred wasn't buying.  That, and she secretly enjoyed watching him go into a tizzy.  Besides, wasn't it her job to make sure these two kids got where they belonged?
     "Well, I don't know where Miss Holt knows him from, but he sure was easy on the eyes."
 Steele stared at her.  "Mildred, surely you weren't taken in by that smarmy charm?"
 Mildred shrugged, grinning evilly.  "I just think he's a real cutie.  Not like you are Boss," she hastened to add, seeing his look.
 Remington shrugged.  "You know what this is, don't you Mildred?"
 She shrugged. He assumed an injured air.  "It's Laura's attempt to make me jealous.  Not very creative on her part and I had expected something less petty on her part too."
     Mildred shot him a look.  "Maybe it is and maybe it ain't, but either way, if you're not jealous, why are you getting in such a snit?"
 Remington glared at her, the expression on his face answering her question.  "Don't you have some filing to do?"
 She chuckled, making a mental note to have a discussion with Laura about her "friend."  "I'll take that as a signal to beat it."
 "Say Mildred."
 The portly woman turned around, her eyebrows raised in expectancy.  "Yeah Boss?"
 Remington suddenly looked embarrassed.  "How close do you think they are?"
 "Ask Miss Holt, Boss, not me."

      ***

     Lee let the wind whip through his hair as Laura's little convertible sped down Interstate-1.  He had forgotten how great California weather could be.  Surf, sunshine, and lemon blossoms danced in his head.  Lemon blossoms, smelling of sweetly tart citrus, that unique foreign fragrance, smelling like her scent, like the scent coming from her hair---/No!  Not today!  I won't ruin the mood./
     He looked at Laura.  She was brooding about something; she was also half-cocked if she thought he didn't know what was on her mind.
 "So," he draped a companionable arm around her, "are you going to tell me what Steele did to piss you off royally, or should I guess?"
 Laura blushed, mumbling, "Lee, it's nothing."
 "Sure, and you and your mom get along like a dream.  Laurie, this is me you're talking to.  I practically lived with you in the summers.  I know when something's up with you.  Now spill it."
     Laura gritted her teeth, knowing full well Lee wasn't going to quit prying until he knew everything.
 /It's not like he doesn't know most of the story Laura!  Hell, he's the one who came up with the name!/  She rolled her eyes.  It was disgusting the way her mind got so logical on her.
 "Out with it Laura," Lee prompted her.
     Running her fingers through her hair, Laura sighed.  "You swear that this conversation never leaves this car."
 "Cross my heart and hope to die."  Lee made an X across his chest.  She shot him an irritated look.
 "I mean it!"  Laura shrugged.  "Look, we just had a fight in my office."
 "About what?"
 Her face heated up with a blush.
 "Laura?"
 "Alright!"
 Lee grinned.  "I knew I could wheedle it out of you."
 She rolled her eyes.  "Do you want to hear this or not?"
 Raising his hands in mock surrender, Lee became serious.
 Taking a deep breath, Laura said, "Well, you know--he and I---we're"
 "Spit it out Laura."  Lee couldn't help but notice Laura was turning the most amazing shade of pink.
 "Look, we had a fight about you, okay?"
 He didn't think it was possible for someone to get that flushed without the aid of a sunburn.  Lee tried to wipe the smirk off his face.  "Why a fight about me?"
 He barely heard her mumble, "He thinks you're an ex-lover."
 There.  She had said it.  Laura cringed, knowing what was coming.  Sure enough, Lee burst into his baritone laugh.  Vexed at being laughed at, Laura snapped petulantly, "Quit it!"
     Lee rubbed her shoulder affectionately.  "I'm sorry baby.  I just can't believe the guy jumped to that conclusion.  Did you explain about us?"
 Laura shrugged.  "Yeah, but trust me, he was not about to believe me."
 Grinning like a damn banshee, Lee teased her.  "Well, I can see why he would think that."
 "What?!"
     He winked, aggravating her even more.  "Think about it.  His pretty girlfriend gets a visit from a dashing, incredibly gorgeous old friend."
 Shaking her head, Laura grinned.  "You are such a jerk."
 Lee smirked before putting on his sunglasses (looking as incredibly gorgeous and dashing as he joked he was ;)  "So, since you took the day off, what's on the agenda?"
 "How long has it been since you rode the waves?"
 Shooting her an incredulous look, Lee groaned.  "God Laura, I haven't surfed in five years."
 "All the more reason you should do it now.  That is...unless you're chicken."
 "Oh, is that a challenge?  I'm the one who taught you how to ride one in."
 One finely sculpted brow rose.  "Put your money where your mouth is, cowboy."
 Hazel eyes met brown in mock contempt.  "You're on Spitfire."
 Laura giggled.  "Good.  Now, where are you staying?"
 "At the Sheraton."
 She shook her head.  "Not a chance.  Why waste your money?  My couch is yours."
 Lee looked at her.  "You sure?"
 Laura nudged him in that affectionate way she had with him.  "Hey, what are little sisters for, Scarecrow?"

      ***